


Torn

by SpookyMoth



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, ChoujiKarui-Sideship, Dark, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Friendship/Love, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, NejiTen-Sideship, Post-War, SakuKanku-Sideship, ShikaTema-Sideship, Smut, Suicidal Thoughts, Survivor Guilt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-24
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:53:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 16
Words: 73,157
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25530895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpookyMoth/pseuds/SpookyMoth
Summary: They survived, but the price was high. They try to find their way back into their lives and adjust, but how do you build a future if peace was never an option? The new forming Shinobi Alliance is put to the test when a group of rebels forms to turn the world order upside down. Can they prevent the war this time? Because they're already torn.
Relationships: Inuzuka Kiba/Yamanaka Ino
Comments: 76
Kudos: 25





	1. Prologue: The Price

**Author's Note:**

> This story deals with different tough topics and therefore I advise everyone to stop reading here, if something in the tags let you feel uncomfortable. I also give an additional warning for potential triggers. 
> 
> I think in OG Naruto/Boruto they never really deal with the after-effects of war. Like trauma, PTSD, alcohol abuse etc. and this is my attempt to show the dark side of shinobi.
> 
> CW: Blood / Injuries
> 
> Song: Leprous - "The Price"

He knew her smell since their days at the academy and among all his other classmates she smelt really nice, because she always smelled like fancy flowers and earth. He liked those kind of scents. They were better than all those other nasty things sometimes penetrated his nose.

What was irritating him, was Naruto, who sometimes forgot to put on a clean shirt or Chouji, who loved to eat those spicy flavoured potato chips that made him sneeze. Sasuke's strong odour of fire also wasn't his cup of tea. Not to talk about Shino and his bugs. He didn't need to see them. He smelled them.

Shikamaru was one of the people he liked having around. Even if they never talked about it, Kiba new that his classmate was often in the forest and usually there was a hint of deer and grass in his clothes. Hinata and Sakura also weren't that bad. Sometimes the latter would use a shampoo that smelled too much and he often could smell the salty scent of tears on the Hyuuga heir – which made him sad – but they were good company.

But if he ever had to chose which company he enjoyed the most, it was Ino's. Not because of her brash personality. She often was too loud and emotional for him. Also he didn't understand why she still chased after Sasuke - to be honest he didn't know why any of the girls were chasing after the Uchiha – he just liked to smell her. And this wasn't odd. It was a way for him to communicate. She smelled welcoming.

That days were so far away now. He wished back those days. Where his only worries would be the next day in school or when Akamaru needs a bath. He clearly remembers how she always smiled at him. It was gentle and warm. It made her look even more beautiful.

However, being deep in thought about those more pleasant days in their lives didn't help them. He needed to focus. He couldn't space out in the middle of this damn war.

Ino was lying in his arms, unconscious and badly injured. Kiba smelled the blood, this iron-like scent every breathing being always had on his skin. The puddle of blood forming in the mud under her, showed she was dying in his arms and he couldn't do anything about it.

“Please, Ino. Please don't die”, he repeated like a prayer.

He would not loose her. Not after most of his friends were either wounded or dead. They needed her. He needed her. A life without Ino was unthinkable.

Finally Akamaru came back. Sakura riding on his back. She looked worse than the last time he had seen her. Kiba didn't know if it was hours or days ago. Then, she wasn't covered in dirt. The streaks in her face, showing she had cried not that long ago and the smell. She smelled like death.

“Where's the wound?” she asked, jumping to his side.

“At her stomach. She didn't stop bleeding.”

Sakura nodded. “Help me laying her on the ground.”

Kiba did as she commanded and watched her fascinated as she torn the cloths aside with her bare hands. Soon after her hands were glowing green. The deep wound got smaller and stopped bleeding.

“Hand me my needles and threads, Kiba. They are in my bag.”

“Is she going to be okay?” he asked with a hoarse voice, after he gave Sakura the needle.

“I hope so. She urgently needs blood. But for now she's safe.” Sakura cut the thread with her teeth. “Please hold her steady. This gonna hurt and I don't know if she will wake up.”

Kiba swallowed hard but placed his hands on Ino's shoulders. Her face was so pale. As Sakura began to stitch her up, she was whimpering and frowning.

“It's fine, Ino. You're not alone. I'm here.”

He hoped she could hear him.

* * *

She didn't remember how she got into a medical tent. The last thing she saw where this freaking Zetsu with the intent to kill. Then she was on the ground and looking at the slowly fading night sky that welcomed a new day. She thought it was a pretty sight. Dying like this wouldn't be so bad. After this her memory was lost.

Now everything hurt. She laid on her back because her whole stomach was a mess. Some medic, she didn't know, had told her she need some rest and at least two litres of blood before she was discharged. Ino had forgot to ask, if she was allowed to sit up and drink the water she was thirsty for.

She stared at the ceiling of the tent and couldn't stop thinking about the water. Also she needed to pee. But there was nobody near her she could ask for help. Ino knew they were at war. She wasn't hurt life-threatening. It was totally normal that no medic or her friends were near. Anyhow the urge to cry was there.

She wanted to cry it because it hurts. She wanted to cry because her father was dead. She wanted to cry because she want to be told that this war would end soon.

Ino was so done with this war. She wanted home. See the trees that surrounded her village. Just sell flowers at her family's shop and later go eating with Shikamaru and Chouji at YakinikuQ. Shortly after thinking about her teammates she started sobbing. She didn't even know if those two were alive.

_What if all of her friends are dead?_

“Ino?”

She turned her head and saw Shikamaru enter the tent.

Her lips trembled. He had an eye-patch on his right eye. His clothes were dirty and torn. Right behind him, was Chouji. She gasped as she saw that one of his arms was missing. This must be a bad dream. She's just dreaming.

They reached her camp bed and while Shikamaru placed himself near her feet, Chouji sat down on a stool. She clasped her hand in front of her mouth. She was so relieved they were alive, but to see them so destroyed, made her cry even more.

“Stop crying, Ino”, Chouji tried to calm her. “It's nothing.”

“I'm so sorry, Chouji”, she whispered.

Her friend gave her sad smile. “That's war. We are alive.”

“And I'm sure Lady Tsunade will think of something”, Shikamaru added.

“What's with your eye, Shika?”

He shrugged his shoulders. “It's still there, but I will be blind on that side.” She sniffed as Shikamaru squeezed her should. “As Chouji said: We are alive.”


	2. Exit Wounds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW: Blood/ Mention of alcohol abuse 
> 
> Song: Placebo - "Exit Wounds"

His new eyesight was still unfamiliar and often enough he ran into other people, trees, and mostly stumbled across the village like an idiot. Shikamaru knew he would get used to it one day, but he wasn't sure, if he was patient enough for this. The most unnerving thing was he couldn't see the Shogi board.

"Checkmate", Temari announced and grinned in his direction.

"That's unfair", he answered. "I didn't see half of the board."

"Are you whining, crybaby?" Her tone was teasing and he turned his head to see her smile completely.

He sighed. "Why did I invite you to play Shogi, again?" 

"Because of this", she said and leaned over the board to seal his lips with hers. 

He grabbed her by the shoulders to help her keeping the balance. Shikamaru sometimes thought it was a dream. Before war he wouldn't have thought that one day he and Temari are going to be a couple. And now he was sitting here with her, only months after the war and they were kissing on the porch of his home, while they play Shogi.

He could taste the orange tea she drank earlier on her lips. He closed his eyes and started getting lost in her. Kissing Temari was his most favourite thing in the world. It was like being drunk but without a hang over. She was his drug and he couldn't get enough of her, nor she seemed to be tired of receiving his kisses.

She had helped him to deal with everything war had chosen to burden him. The loss of his father and friends, living with only one eye and also all the duties he had taken over as soon as he could work again. He still could remember the tears she cried at his bed because the kunai that hit his eye almost killed him. Shikamaru knew it was all thanks to Kankuro he still had one eye. If he wouldn't had interfered his eye-sight would've been completely gone.

The pain was gone now, thankfully. But the after-effects still bothered him. He was exhausted easily, because reading with one eye needed training. And it was out of question he would go on missions soon. Tsunade, Shizune and Sakura had agreed that one day his left eye would adapt to the changes, but it could take up to at least a year. Therefore he pushed to form the Shinobi Alliance so he could do something for Konoha. Retiring wasn't an option. He wanted to help Naruto to become Hokage. So he would not quit.

Temari was now sitting on his lap and had her arms around his neck. He loved that she deepened their kiss and pressed herself closer. He had his hands on her hips. Being this close, breathing her in, kissing her, feeling her smiling against his lips. He didn't need more.

Her head rested on Shikamaru's chest. Absently he stroked her hair, while she let out a content sigh. She was so damn happy to lie in his arms after they made love. Even if it was winter, they had opened his door so they could watch the sun settling on the horizon. The last sun-rays shone on them. It was pure bliss.

She remembered the days they were just friends. All the nagging and banter they exchanged. That he always invited her for dinner although he she could pay the meal herself. How he lazily laid on his favourite hill to watch the clouds, and she had to search for him, because he needed a break and hid from the world.

He had grown so much. After the death of his sensei she recognized the first small changes. He got more determined and focussed. She knew he didn't like all the responsibilities, but he didn't complain as often as before.

The war had left not only the visible scar in his face. She knew how deep the pain rooted in his heart and soul. Therefore she tried with all her might to rescue him from this darkness. Shikamaru wasn't weak but he cared too much for his own good. She still was scared to loose him.

“I can hear you thinking, Tem”, he said tired. “Tell me what's bothering you.”

She searched for his hand and squeezed it. “I'm just grateful that I've you”, she answered simply.

“Even if I'm a lazy crybaby?” She could hear him smirk. Normally she would've punched him, but she just gave him a nudge at his side. He flinched.

“Because you're a lazy crybaby.” He kissed her on her hair. “I don't want to go home.”

“Then stay,” he offered. “You don't have to go back. Maybe we can join Choji and go to Kumo. Or what about Nami no Kuni? Living at the ocean sounds appealing. I'll fish and you can swim all day until you're tanned.” His hand gently caressed her back. “And in the evening we I'll cook and play Shogi.”

She laughed. “Don't be silly. Without me Kankuro and Gaara are lost in Suna. And we need your genius to get the Shinobi Alliance going. But if we both are done with all the stupid shinobi stuff, we can got on a vacation.”

“You're right, like always, my troublesome woman.” He exhaled deeply. “Also we should dress. I'm sure my mum comes home every minute and I don't think she will approve of what we have done half an hour ago.”

Temari let out a last sigh and propped herself on her arms.

She looked him in the face. Her hand softly stroking his right cheek. He didn't wear an eye-patch when they were alone. There was a diagonal scar from his temple over his eye, almost reaching his nose. His eye looked normal, just a tiny line in his iris that once was a large gap. The eye wasn't damaged, because Sakura healed it completely. But the optic nerve was beyond repair because of the poison on the kunai.

She kissed his eyebrow before she stood up.

* * *

She summoned a ton of shuriken from her scrolls to throw them into Neji's direction. He spun around and dodged every ninja weapon without a flaw. She landed on her feet and breathed heavily. They were training since sunrise and the evening was already setting but Neji still wanted to continue.

Since the war he was furious. He doubled his training-time and didn't rest properly. He had lost so much weight. Also he didn't sleep well. The bags under his eyes were scaring her. She was worried about him, but as stubborn as he was, she followed his path. Some day he would realize that this was wrong. She shared his anger.

Losing Lee was too much to deal with. And losing Hinata and Hiashi killed the last ounce of patience he had had. Now he helped Hanabi to take over the head of the Hyuuga clan. Neji wanted to please the elders, please Konoha and fill the gap in his heart with something. She got left out by him in these issues.

Tenten took a cloth and wiped the sweat from her face. She felt giddy and staggered. Thankfully Neji grabbed her before she made her way to the ground.

“I'm sorry”, he murmured into her hair. “I've overdone it again.”

She opened her eyes to see his face full of pain. “It's okay, Neji. I've said I will help you.”

He shook his head. “I know you're worried, Tenten. So please stop me from being an idiot.”

“You aren't an idiot. You're hurt. We all are hurt.” She bit her lip. “But can we call it a day? I'm done for today and I need something to eat.”

“Sure”, he answered and let go of her. “How about barbecue?”

She nodded. “That sounds good.”

Then he leaned into her direction and put a kiss on her forehead. “Thanks, Tenten.”

These small moments were the reason why she stayed by his side.

Hanabi greeted him at the gates of the Hyuuga complex. She looked worried. Like every time he came home late. He wanted to comfort her, promise her he would always come home, but that was a promise he wasn't able to give. She had to grow up the last months. After the death of her father and her sister she had to take the head of the clan. He wished he could do more, but he was from the branch family and therefore his power was restricted.

“You were gone the whole day. Please at least leave a note, Neji,” she greeted him, “the elders were looking for you.”

“Next time,” he answered, “now I just want a shower.”

Her face hardened at his response.

He knew he should show some kind of emotion. Show a sign that the deaths of his uncle and cousin bothered him. Neji didn't want to show weakness in front of her. She needed his support and he was giving her everything he could. But he would never cry in front of her. Crying was a weakness, and he promised himself he would become better. He was to weak to protect Hinata. It would never happen again.

He said good night to Hanabi and walked into his room. He had insisted to move into the main house and the elders agreed without much complaints. They knew without him Hanabi was lost. She was to young and inexperienced. He was an outstanding shinobi and knew all the clans secret techniques. If their antics wouldn't stand in the way, he would take over the head of the clan. He hoped one day the separation of main and branch family came to an end.

Neji undressed and stepped into the shower. As the water started pouring down his body, he didn't hold back the tears.

It took a long time before he was able to turn of the shower.

* * *

“Where is the blood?” Sakura screamed at the nurse, who was helping her to stop the bleeding. The last hour she tried to save a kunoichi from dying. Sakura's whole body was covered with sweat and blood. She didn't know how much blood they already infused into the woman's body, because she bleed from more than three wounds.

“We ordered it ten minutes ago”, the nurse answered and looked scared.

Sakura growled and kneaded more chakra. She would not lose this woman. It wasn't her fault that they were short of medic-ninja and therefore had to bring her back to the village to heal her. She already started to train every capable shinobi in Konoha to do at least first aid on the field. But it wasn't enough. It was never enough.

The bleeding didn't stop. She started swearing. No, not today. She had lost five patients today. Please, don't make it a sixth. Her husband and the two year old daughter were waiting outside. She wouldn't loose this fight. She wouldn't tell the man he lost his wife. The little girl wouldn't live without her mother.

All her cussing and praying didn't help. The woman's heart stopped. The blood still splashed on the floor, soaking her shoes. Sakura knew she had lost. She could try CPR, but without the blood there was not a chance of rescue. The nurse started the heart massage, the other medic breathed into the nose, but Sakura was done. She was done with this day and her job. She turned around and left the room, her colleagues shouting she should come back.

Sakura just ran.

The people looked after her as she got faster and headed for the exit. Her shoes made bloody footprints on the floor. She didn't care.

Finally outside in the cold and crispy air, she felt better. She leaned over one of the bushes and threw up. With the back of her hand she wiped her mouth. Now realizing she was covered in blood from head to toe, she fumbled on her shoes. She took them off and threw them into the next bin.

It was too much. Every patient she lose was too much. She had pretended nothing could stop her. She was invincible. The best medic, besides Senju Tsunade, in the whole world and nobody, not even death, would stop her. She was such a fool. In the war she wasn't able to rescue her friends.

Sasuke had died in her arms. The love of her life died because of her incapability to use chakra. He had reached with his blood covered hand into her face. Saying that he loved her. After all these years she had hoped for this, in the moment of his death he suddenly confessed his love.

She screamed and cried. Sakura fell on her knees no longer able to stand straight.

“I can't take this any more, Sasuke-kun. Why did you leave me? Is that some kind of punishment, because I loved you beyond logic?”

Her body trembled from exhausting and the sobbing. She needed a break. She should quit her job. It was too much.

Then there was a hand on her shoulder.

Naruto hated to see Sakura like this. He took her home with him after she was crying in front of the hospital. In his apartment he helped her to get into the shower, gave her clean clothes and even made a bowl with instant ramen.

Now she was sitting on his bed, her wet hair hanging sadly from her head while she stared into the bowl with noodles.

“You've to eat, Sakura-chan,” he said softly. “I'm sure you haven't eaten all day.”

She didn't look up or moved. Her eyes focused on the steam of the food. He wanted to do something.

Naruto knew that Sakura blamed herself for every single death of their friends, for every injury she couldn't heal and every patient she lost after the war. She did lose Sasuke. He lost Hinata. Shikamaru's blind eye and Chouji's missing arm: Sakura blamed it on herself.

If someone was to blame, it was him. He wasn't fast enough to defeat Madara and Obito. Sasuke died because she rescued Naruto. It was also his fault, not hers alone. But he could repeat this until the end of time. She wouldn't believe him.

“I'm not hungry”, she mumbled. “I'm just tired.”

He frowned. “You're not the alone, Sakura-chan”, he said softly, “we all are mourning and blame ourselves. You did everything you could in the war. You saved so many lives -”

“DON'T YOU DARE!” she yelled at him. “DON'T YOU DARE TO BLAME IT ON YOU, NARUTO!”

She jumped from the bed and with two steps she was in front of him. Her eyebrows were drawn together angrily. He flinched backwards. It was a long time ago she was angry at him.

“I'm also to blame, Dattebayo!” he said with a growl, “you healed me instead of Sasuke. It's my fault he's gone. I could've been more cautious on the battle field. But I wasn't.”

Her lips trembled and the tears started falling from her eyes. She threw herself at his chest. He put his arms around her.

“I'm so sorry, Naruto. I just can't take this any longer. It hurts so much.”

It was hard to keep his composure. He didn't want to cry in front of Sakura.

“We'll get through this hard times, Sakura-chan. We sure will.”

* * *

Morning strolls had changed. Before war he would always check if Hinata was home and take her with him and Akamaru on his trip through Konoha. Often they would met up with Shino in the forest and train. It was a nice routine they developed over the years. He thought it would always be the same.

War changed everything.

From now on his first walk would be to the cemetery, where he would pray for Hinata and Shino.

Since four months he was never interrupted in this routine. He still didn't comprehend they would never greet him again, talk to him, nag him. He missed Hinata's smile and cheerful attitude. He would've paid every price to see Shino standing silently beside him.

Kiba didn't cry at their graves. He cried at night, alone in his room, where he stroked Akamaru's fur and tried to understand why this had happened to him. His heart was not only broken, it was torn into pieces and these hurt him with every breath he took.

Today he wasn't alone. He saw someone else standing at a grave not far from his friends. He recognized her long, blond hair. Her head was bowed and the figure was shaking. Kiba hadn't seen her for long. They weren't that close before and after the war they were busy with so many duties. 

Team 10 was the only one amongst them that still had an intact team. Sure, Shikamaru was blind on one eye, and Choji had to live with one arm, but they were alive. It was a comforting thought that they still had each other. 

As he watched her, he unconsciously traced her smell. Her normal flowery scent was accompanied with a strong alcoholic breath. That alarmed him. 

Ino wasn't a drinker. She knew that alcohol was bad for her body and therefore she only drank one or two servings before dropping out. She wanted to preserve her beauty. Kiba sniffed a little longer. Even her sweat was filled with this alcoholic scent. His feet started moving without thinking. 

She had noticed him in the second he set foot on the cemetery. She was a Yamanaka after all and war had evolved her jutsu and her range. Perhaps the only good thing that came out of war. The rest of her life was nothing more than a burden to her. 

She still grieved her father's death and would probably never stop mourning. He was gone and she need to handle the nightmares. Ino couldn't remember the last time she'd slept longer than three hours. 

After all she should be grateful, because she was alive. Not like the other unfortunate souls that were buried six feet under, and died young, too young.

Her mind played games with her and showed her this picture-perfect images of her dead friends. Lee with his bushy eye-brows smiling, while he was walking on his hands through Konoha. Sai sitting on his favourite spot and drawing the falling cherry blossoms. Sasuke full of rage besides Naruto in the Fourth Shinobi War.

It felt unreal that she was sitting with Sakura in her bedroom and instead of talking about fashion, boys or hair, they were crying about their losses.

Sakura had changed. She worked more hours and seldom came home. Often Ino had to stop her from working another double shift because she could see her friend breaking apart. Sakura was fading away.

Ino knew she was a hypocrite. She didn't take care of herself. On too many evenings she emptied a bottle of wine to calm her nerves. Hoping that the nightmares would not smother her.

With one last look at her father's gravestone she turned around.

Kiba was standing right behind her, Akamaru at his side. They were two rows apart and he looked at her concerned. She tried to raise the corners of her mouth for a smile but failed miserable. The last time she smiled seemed so far away. Her costumers at the flower shop got a fake smile she had trained over the last months. It didn't feel right to give him such a smile.

“You're here early”, she started a conversation to break the silence.

“Akamaru needs a walk in the mornings”, he answered without any emotion in his voice. Kiba didn't make any attempt to smile.

She bit her lip as the awkward silence came back.

“Kiba, I don't think I've ever said thank you.” She looked down at her feet. “Sakura told me you were the one that saved my life.”

He cleared his throat. “You don't have to thank me, Ino. I'm sure you would've done the same.”

“I'm not that brave”, she squeezed out. “I saw people dying around me and I did nothing, Kiba.”

His hand on her should came suddenly. She winced and looked into his eyes.

“You saved me”, he whispered. Then his hand was gone and he turned around, leaving the cemetery. She starred after him not sure what he meant.

* * *

Kumogakure was nice. Chouji liked the food and the company. Since Karui was the one to care for his well-being inside the village he felt much less alone. He missed his friends and Konoha, but with her on his side the home sickness was gone. She felt like home.

He was walking through Kumo on his way to the outskirts of the village. The war gave them a lot of difficulties. In addition to all those killed in the war, which represented a great loss of security for all the major hidden villages, the Nukenin and vanished shinobi were particularly challenging.

Therefore he was sent with various other ninja from Konoha and Kiri as reinforcements. His mission could last years, but he needed to do this. He could not deal with the sorrow that drifted through his home. Every street-corner remembered him of his dead friends.

The tears Ino cried were too much. Looking at Shikamaru hurt him even more than the loss of his left arm. Tsunade was confident she could give him a new arm with the cultivated cells of the first Hokage. But it would take some time. Also because he was from the Akimichi clan and for his techniques he needed some special adjustments.

He greeted some of the villagers on his way and finally Karui came in sight. She was discussing something with two Anbu from Konoha. He waited patiently until she was done before he greeted her.

“Hey, Karui. What's our job today?”

She turned around and smiled at him. “Hi, Chouji. Tonight two strangers tried to infiltrate the village. So we are on high alert today.”

He nodded and adjusted his bag. It was filled with provisions for twelve hours.

“Are you leaving?” he wanted to know. Being alone on watch duty was beyond boring.

She shook her head. “You're lucky. Darui wanted me to look if I find something suspicious.”

“Then let's go.”

Karui liked working with Chouji a lot. He was calm and friendly. He loved to talk about food, but even more about his friends. She knew how much he missed Konoha.

They were sitting in the watch-post and she listened to his story about Shikamaru and his favourite past-time: Cloud-watching and eating potato chips. Thinking about such an hilarious profane activity made her laugh. She always thought that Konohan shinobi would train until the couldn't move a muscle. But Chouji proved her wrong, again.

“You're telling me, that Konoha is full of capable shinobi, who have nothing else to do but watching clouds?”

Chouji started laughing. “That's only Shikamaru and me. Naruto love to waste his time eating Ramen at Ichiraku's.”

“That's incredible. Could guys do more than eat and nap? I'm sure you're all not born with natural talent. Every shinobi needs to train. Even you people in Konoha.”

“Sure, we do. But we like to spend time with our friends. Bonds are important for us.” Karui could her the sadness in his voice. She put a hand on his arm.

They knew each other for two months until date and she already knew how much it hurt him that most of his friends were wounded or gone forever. Chouji had a kind heart. He never raised his voice in anger or speak ill of people. He got upset easily because of the smallest things and he couldn't stand unfair behaviour.

At one day she had seen how he jumped in between as some boys started to bully a girl. He scared them away and took the girl home. Karui knew that one day he would be a great and caring father. His wife-to-be would be a happy woman.

“How's your mother by the way, Karui?”

She was startled by his question. “She's better. It was just a cold.”

“That's good. I wanted to visit her tomorrow. Are you also home?”

She smiled at him. Karui really liked Chouji.

* * *

Gaara sat in his office and thought about the future. The world was still in tumour and the dust of war hadn't settled yet. They lost so many good shinobi. No, not just shinobi, but at most a lot of friends. 

He was in Konoha to honour the fallen. It had hurt him to see Naruto in so much pain. He felt the same as he remembered their faces. 

He knew all of them since their Chunin exams. Once they were foes. Back then he didn't care about them. He wasn't able - or better - didn't allow himself to feel attached to others. Gaara had relied on hate and anger. His sole purpose was to kill, fulfil Shukaku's desire for blood and killing. 

Thinking about all the loneliness he had felt back then unsettled him. Hate and revenge where the wrong answer. Because of the way shinobi were trained and left alone with their problems and insecurities war had happened, and finally led to the loss of their loved ones. 

He had seen his sister's face the moment Kankuro had found her on the battlefield and told her about Shikamaru's injury. Gaara immediately knew she loved him. It never crossed his mind, but the second she ran into the direction of the medical tents, seeing the tears forming in her eyes, he was sure. His sister loved Shikamaru and was scared to lose him. 

A knock on the door startled him out of his thoughts. Baki opened the door and entered the room. 

"Gaara, are you ready for the meeting? The Council is waiting."

He nodded and took his Kazekage hat with the insignia "Wind" on front. 

"Is Kankuro already back from his mission?" 

"We await him at the evening."

Kankuro was a capable Shinobi. He was experienced, quick and most of all a master of his puppets. With a flick of his fingers he sent Sasori into the direction of the man in front of him. His other hand moved Karasu behind him as Kunai flew into his direction. Sanshōuo was hid in the sand below him and should function as a trap for the two other man surrounding him. 

His plan was without a flaw. It was like a well studied dance he knew the steps without thinking. He had the skill and the confidence to win the battle without a scratch. Then the world spun upside down. 

He landed on his back. All air left his lungs. It hurt like hell. For one second he couldn't move. His back was paralysed. 

"Who's the winner know puppet boy?" 

Asked a voice behind him, from under the sand. He could sense his enemy's chakra even if he wasn't able to see him. It was huge in comparison to his own reserves. Almost on the level of a jinchuriki. Kankuro knew he was doomed. 

A sharp pain at his leg was the last thing he felt before he lost his conscious.


	3. Sober

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW: Alcohol Abuse / Blood / Mention of suicidal thoughts
> 
> Song: Pink - "Sober"

It was unusual to get called this early in the Hokage's office. Lady Tsunade sat in her chair and the bottle of sake clearly viewable on her desk. After war she gave up hiding the amounts of alcohol she drank.

Kiba always knew her days sober were less than everybody expected. His nose never betrayed him. He understood her. They all had lost something in the war and losing the Raikage and the Tsuchikage had not only destroyed her self-confidence but also the trust in her own abilities as a medic. He knew because Sakura and Shizune were the one doing the most work in the hospital, while Tsunade emptied another bottle of sake.

Shikamaru closed the door behind him. It still unsettled Kiba to see him with his eye-patch. There was no cure for him and it hurt Kiba so much, even if his friend said he can later tell his kids some cool stories of how he lost his eye-sight.

They greeted each other with a nod. Kiba walked further into the office and saw that Lady Tsunade also had called for other people. Kakashi was leaning on a wall and reading in one of his books. Naruto and Sakura were standing in front of her desk. And then there was Ino sitting on a chair.

“Thanks for coming, Kiba. I hope you're well.”

“Yes, Lady Tsunade”, he answered.

“I ordered you here today because of a mission. The Kazekage needs our help. They need to track down a traitor and a group of rebels. They almost killed his brother.”

“How bad is Kankuro wounded, Shishou?” Sakura immediately asked.

“He's alive”, Shizune answered, because Tsunade frowned her forehead.

Shikamaru sighed. “He's in a coma and they hope he wakes up. That's what Temari told me the other day.”

“Why can't these bastards stop?” Naruto made a fist and clenched his teeth.

“Because war is not over”, Kakashi said and closed his book. “What are our orders?”

“You will start you mission tomorrow morning. Travel to Suna and help the Kazekage.” Tsunade handed Kakashi a scroll. “Sakura and Shikamaru stay in Suna. Their help is needed inside the village. The others hunt down that traitor. The Kazekage wants him alive.”

* * *

_The sun felt nice on her face and she closed her eyes to enjoy the warm sun rays on her skin._

_She always preferred summer over any other season. Summer meant most flowers bloom and she could do so many different bouquets in lively colours. Also summer meant it was wedding season. Talking with bride and groom about the arrangements and find something that fits for the couple, was the best part about it. Ino liked to see people happy._

_“Why are you girls always this boring?” shouted Naruto, who had joined Kiba, Shino, Lee and Neji in a game she didn't know and much more didn't care about. She wanted a nice, quite day on the beach, eating watermelon and getting tanned._

_“Do Shikamaru and Choji look like girls?” Sakura answered loudly._

_Shikamaru opened one of his eyes and looked at Sakura. “Mendukose, could you two stop screaming? There are people who want to sleep.”_

_“Didn't you want to show Temari how to swim?” Chouji asked as he bit from his watermelon._

_“She decided I was too lazy. Tenten and Hinata are with her.” With this last remark he closed his eye again._

_Ino stretched her arms over her head and sighed._

_“Please don't move, beautiful.”_

_Completely startled she looked at Sai. He was sitting in front of her. In one hand he had his brush, in the other he had his sketchbook._

_“Are you drawing me?”_

_“I draw everything that's beautiful.”_

_She blushed deeply but the moment was destroyed as Kiba threw the ball at her and Shino's bugs swarmed to bring the ball back._

“Ino, sweetheart. Wake up. You just had a bad dream.”

She opened her eyes with a gasp. Her mother was looking down at her. Her dream had felt so real. The memory of this day was so stuck in her head.

As realization hit her, the tears started flooding her eyes. Like she always did when Ino was upset, her mother wrapped her in her arms and started rubbing her back. She didn't want to cry because of this dream. She remembered this day. It was such a precious memory. One where they were still alive. All of her friends.

“You can leave me alone, Ka-chan”, she said with a broken voice after a few minutes. “I've to get up. I've a mission.”

“Are you sure, you want to go, my little daisy?”

She sniffed as her mother called her that. “I need to fulfil my duty as a shinobi. I can't drop out.”

Kiba wasn't the first to arrive at the gates. Sakura and Shikamaru were standing and talking. They didn't bother as he joined them and just listened to the conversation, that was mostly about the mission.

Last night he didn't sleep well. Akamaru had tried to comfort him, but he couldn't stop shaking after he had again seen the dead eyes of Hinata. He still got shivers when he thought about it. She gave her life for Naruto and all he could hear was how she blamed him. Blaming her teammate for not reacting better and faster. He started sweating as he thought about it.

Akamaru moved closer to him try to give him comfort. It helped, if only a little.

One after another came to the gates. Normally they would wait for Kakashi. He always was the last. But today it was Ino they were waiting for.

“She's on her way”, Kiba said softly as Sakura thought about sending one of Naruto's clones.

Sakura looked at him dumbfounded. “How do you know?”

“I can smell her”, he answered bluntly and she didn't push further. They trusted his abilities and he was glad about it. A few minutes later Ino appeared out of breath at the gates.

“I'm sorry guys. I forgot to pack yesterday.”

Kiba could smell she had drunk. The sour odour of fermented grapes tickled his nose. He hoped she was able to work. Because without her jutsu they couldn't do the mission. They relied on her abilities.

* * *

She had a problem. The first day in the desert she felt good and was full of energy. Finally seeing something else. Not the borders of Konoha, but being on a mission. She felt alive, ecstatic and useful.

Since the war ended her focus was on grieving and putting the pieces together. Help her friends to get better. And on this way she lost herself. She lost to feel anything at all and started relying on a replacement: alcohol. 

It hit her the morning of the second day. She felt miserable. Didn't know if she got sleep at all. First she thought it was because of the temperatures that her head throbbed. She drank lots of water and tried to avoid the glares of her teammates. At night her hands started to tremble. 

Ino just sat by the campfire to warm herself, when she no longer could hold the chopsticks and they fell into the sand. She made a comment about her inability to eat properly and continued eating. 

The second time she dropped the chopsticks, Kiba prevent them from falling on the ground. He handed them back to her with a serious look on his face. She tried to act naturally. 

"Thanks, Kiba. I don't know why I'm this clumsy today."

"You're just nervous because I'm near", he answered with a grin. 

Instead an answer she raised her mouth shortly. Any other time she always had liked his funny remarks and flat jokes. She liked flirting with him. But it was different now. She felt wrong. She wasn't open for feelings or worse a relationship. Because she knew she could never love him. Love was lost for her. She was broken, beyond repair. 

She was grateful that Kiba and Shikamaru would take the first turn for the watch and after that it was Naruto and Kakashi. Ino knew she could rest the whole night and hopefully the trembling in her hands was just a sign she was cold. She wasn't an addict. She could function without alcohol. 

Kiba watched as Shikamaru lit his third cigarette within thirty minutes. The smell was horrible. He hated the smoke and how it burned in his nose. Thankfully there was no wind in his direction and he could avoid it. 

"Some day you'll realize that cigarettes don't make you cool."

Shikamaru looked in his direction and raised his eyebrow. "Did I ever make the impression I want to be cool?" 

Kiba snorted. "With that eye-patch you definitely look bad-ass. Is that how you got the Suna girl?" 

Shikamaru tapped the ash of his cigarette and took another drag. 

"War changes", he answered thoughtfully. "I knew she was important for me long before war. But after she cried at my camp bed because I was injured it suddenly clicked."

Kiba heard Akamaru yawn and he buried his hand into his dog's fur. He knew what Shikamaru meant. He also had this moment where he realized something important. The difference was: He didn't act on it because he could see that Ino wasn't ready. She avoided everyone and he didn't want to scare her. 

"I'm happy for you, dude", he said. "I hope one day I also find a girl that doesn't think I'm an idiot."

"You are not an idiot, Kiba", Shikamaru answered and put out his cigarette. "And I see how you look at Ino."

The dark tune in Shikamaru's voice was something he had never heard from his friend. He was always calm and collected. This felt dangerous.

"I'm worried about her", he answered, “she behaves strange." He exhaled deeply. "Also she smells like alcohol. I've traced it on her a few times now."

"We know." Shikamaru stared into the fire. "Choji and I tried to talk about it with her, but she just acted like it's nothing. I don't know how it is to have siblings, but I think it must feel this way, when I see her in pain. Would you help us, helping Ino?"

"You don't have to ask, Shikamaru. I'll do what I can."

* * *

The Kazekage's office was almost too small for the mass of people gathered there. Ino had seen that Temari threw herself into Shikamaru's arms. He friend kissed her on the top of her head, while they started a whispered conversation. She was a little bit jealous because of this sight and felt bad instantly. Shikamaru deserved happiness. 

Ino knew why she felt that way. She also wanted to open her heart. Give and take love. Feel complete again without searching for more, something that filled the void inside her. She tried. She really tired to be human again and not just function day in and day out. But the reality usually punched her with such accuracy in the face that her thoughts sometimes drift further. How it would be to sleep and never wake up again. 

The trembling in her hands thankfully subsided in the last two days. She sweated more than usual but they were in the desert. It wasn't that uncommon to sweat more, she told herself.

"I want to thank you for arriving so fast", Gaara greeted them, “I need every helping hand, therefore I requested one team to track the traitor down and Sakura for medical aid. Please let Matsuri guide you into the hospital." He nodded to a girl with light brown hair. "Shikamaru you investigate with Temari the incident that led to Kankuros injuries." Temari immediately took him by the hand and left the room. 

Ino tried not to snort. She knew exactly that those two would start their investigation in Temari's bedroom. She shook her head as the door closed. 

Kiba left the Kazekage building the second they were dismissed. He wanted to grab a bite, buy ingredients for Akamaru's food and after that a shower and a good night's rest. They would stay for at least two days in Suna. He and Akamaru needed to prepare because their noses, besides Kakashi's Ninken, ensured the success of this mission. If they were able to find this guy and all of his allies, Ino would use her Mind Transfer Jutsu to get him captured alive.

He turned right to look for a place with barbecue as he almost run over someone. He was surprised it was Ino. She had a bag in her hand and blushed. Akamaru barked at her sight, greeting her his way. It was an opportunity he could not let pass by.

“Hey, Ino. Are you hungry?” he asked.

She brushed a streak of her hair behind her ear and her hand grabbed the bag harder. He could see how she wanted to agree but also that she was in conflict. He tried to ease her mind.

“You don't have to agree. I just thought it would be nice to have company that actually can speak.” Akamaru gave a disapproving noise. “It's okay, buddy. I love you. But your smell after four days in the desert is not so nice.”

Ino looked at him with her eyes wide and then started giggling. Kiba was sure it was ages ago since he had her seen smile or laugh. It warmed his heart. Even if it lasted for a second.

“Let's get something to eat”, she finally agreed. “But first I need to bring my bag to my room.”

“I will carry it”, he offered and took the bag out of her hands. This time she gave him a smile.

* * *

„Are there any questions?” Kakashi asked after he had told them details of their mission. They all shook their head. It was a simple tracking mission and they only had a small area to cover. All borders were watched, the Sunese Anbu also tracked the traitor down. Their goal was the north. Gaara had gathered information that the rebels hid there to start a revolution.

Because of the war all nations were short of capable Shinobi and had to rely on the other villages man power. The Shinobi Alliance was in preparation but it would be months before the first official meeting could take place. Therefore the Kazekage used the already tight bond between Konoha and Suna to ask for help.

Ino knew that it was mostly Shikamaru's work their team was sent. He wanted peace. He wanted a peaceful world not for his sake but for Mirai and all the children that were to be born in the future. He always had the bigger picture in mind. She also knew that this was personal. It was Kankuro who had been hurt. He was not only Temari's brother, but he had a special place in Shikamaru's heart since he was the one, who rescued him from getting both eyes destroyed in the war.

Most people wouldn't believe that Shikamaru was able to be angry. His always severe and calm attitude disguised his emotional side. It was his strength that people underestimated him.

As she watched him talking with Kakashi before they would head out for their mission, she was sad he would stay behind. She missed the past times with him and Chouji. Missions where they would work as the Ino-Shika-Cho-combination. She didn't know if they would ever work as a team again.

Choji was stationed in Kumogakure for an unknown time. After he had recovered from his injuries and was able work with only one arm, Tsunade had sent him to the Hidden Cloud. He supported the village in security matters with various other shinobi from Konoha. He wrote letters from time to time and said how much missed his home. The barbecue was better in den Hidden Leaves but he liked the sweets they offered in Kumo. Ino hoped he really was fine and didn't pretend like she did.

“I wish you luck”, Shikamaru said goodbye to them. Ino nodded and ran after her teammates. The desert sun burned her neck.

The desert was the perfect hiding spot. With the winds and the always changing sand dunes someone unfamiliar with the territory could easily get lost. Also smells were carried over large distances and that didn't help people like Kiba to locate their target. But he was well trained in his clans techniques. Tracking smells and even just traces of a unknown scent over kilometres where a piece of cake.

They divided their group. While Naruto, Kakashi and one of his Ninken walked North-West, he, Akamaru and Ino ran along the borders of Ishi and Ame. Both countries had strict border control and were assisted by Iwa but their information said it was likely the rebels hide themselves in the more abandon areas in the Land of Wind.

Kiba stopped his run and closed his eyes. Akamaru had given notice that he had traced something. He made sure his Ninken had smelled the right scent. He collected chakra in his nose to increase the range of his jutsu. Most people believe he followed the scents he tracked without knowing the direction, like he was an animal himself. This mislead interpretation of his clan's jutsu had cost many lives of their enemies. His mind gave him some kind of a map itself with different smells that were colour-coded. He connected the smells from shinobi with their chakra-signature.

The difficulty was to find the scent he was tracking down without knowing the chakra of his target. He tried not to focus his senses on Ino. It was really hard to concentrate on the mission while he was worried about her.

The evening they had run into each other and gone eating he got a glance inside her bag. He swallowed hard as he saw two bottles of wine. He wanted to scream at her for being this stupid. Wanted to say how much it hurt him to see her giving up, but he knew he wasn't better either. He didn't numb his pain with alcohol, but with sex. He never asked for names and was gone the next morning. It helped him sleep. Forget he was alone and nothing more than an empty shell that pretends to feel something.

It was different with Ino. She triggered feelings in him, he knew he shouldn't have. He had feelings for her long before the war, but she didn't see him this way. Kiba knew this without her confirmation. She had run after Sasuke and Sai, perhaps loved them. He was too cheerful, made bad jokes and didn't have this serious, grown up attitude most girls fall in love with.

But that didn't mean he wasn't worried about her.

He opened his eyes and looked at Ino, who gave him a bottle with water. He took some sips and reached it back to her.

“I found something”, he said. “Can you still run? It's about ten kilometres into this direction.”

He pointed with his finger at a distant point near the border of Ishigakure.

“Don't worry about me”, Ino answered and also drank some water. “Should I contact Kakashi?”

He shook his head. “Not for now. I first want some proof I'm not tricked.” He looked at Akamaru. “Lead the way, buddy.”

He would regret this decision.

She had seen him first and instantly draw a kunai.

“Hide and contact Kakashi”, Kiba mumbled and grabbed shuriken from his pouch. Akamaru growled and his fur stood like spikes from his neck. Kiba threw the shuriken into the direction he supposed their enemy was hiding.

Ino didn't hesitate, crouched behind a dune and made an hand sign. Soon she felt her mind connect with Kakashi.

_“We found the target. Here are the coordinates.”_

_“Capture him. We're on our way”, Kakashi answered. “I count on you.”_

_“Hai!”_

Soon she was back in her own mind and could hear the sounds of kunai clashing together. She saw Kiba fighting with taijutsu, while Akamaru stood behind their enemy his teeth bared. They didn't know what kind of jutsu this man had, but he looked skilled and ready to kill.

He was in a poor condition. His clothes were torn on different places and Ino thought she could see half-healed wounds. But his will to fight and die was visible. His eyes had a glow Ino had seen in war on so many faces. In fights like these skill and expertise weren't the sole variables for survival. Most times pure luck helped them. And it seemed luck was on their side.

Ino hoped Kiba wouldn't gamble. He liked to play games and show off his skills. But he surprised her. He took out some paper bombs that were attached on kunai to trap the man inside a circle and then threw shuriken that were prepared with wire. The wire should immobilize the man as soon as it was wrapped around him. She was ready the moment the man gasped. Her hands formed the seal to use the Shintenshin no Jutsu.

Kiba knew something was wrong the moment Ino screamed. Normally he expected her to take over the man's body. But Ino was screaming like she was hurt. He wanted to punch the man in the face, but as long as he didn't know if she was in his mind, he could not punch him. It had effects on Ino, too.

So he jumped at her side and shook her by the shoulder. “INO! Do you hear me?”

He had to keep his calm. Getting into panic was out of question. Then a smell tickled his nose. It was fast approaching and he didn't know the scent. Akamaru also got unsettled and whined. That was bad. Really, really bad. He was alone neither Kakashi or Naruto were this fast. This meant one thing: Their target wasn't alone. He needed a plan.

Kiba formed the hand seals to clone himself. With his clone he took Ino on his arms and hid behind a large sand dune. She had stopped screaming but she didn't look like she was waking up soon. She breathed heavily. The Double-Headed Wolf transformation was his most basic jutsu but at least better than waiting for reinforcements.

As the sand exploded beneath his feet he jumped backwards. With this he was on Akamaru's back and made the transformation complete. Now he was not just a man but also beast. Ready to fight.

* * *

She woke up with a start and looked into the eyes of Naruto. His brows where formed in a worry-line. That didn't ease her mind. Something had happened and she didn't want to know what. But she needed to know.

“Naruto?” she asked unsure. The last thing she remembered was the pain after she switched minds with their target. Her hands felt the sand and the sun blinded her eyes. She still was in the desert. “Where's Kiba?”

Naruto shook his head. “We don't know. Kakashi-sensei follows the traces. There's a lot of blood.”

Ino wanted to stand up, but her head was dizzy and throbbed. It was hard to concentrate. Than her ears recognized a sound. Her head snapped to the side to look at where the sound came from. It was Akamaru.

“Help me”, she demanded from Naruto and grabbed his hand. He supported her clumsy walk to the Ninken.

With each step her heart pounded louder. As they reached Akamaru she was devastated. One of his legs was broken and stuck out at a strange angle. His fur was coated in blood. She never treated a living animal but it was Kiba's dog. She had to do everything for him. Kiba without Akamaru on his side was unimmaginable.

She placed herself at his head and stroked his fur gently. He licked her other hand. Even if she didn't understand Akamaru the same way as Kiba did, she wanted to believe that he was thankful.

“Do you have water, Naruto?” Ino asked softly, while concentrating her chakra in her hands.

“Sure, Ino. Are you thirsty?”

“Give something to Akamaru. He needs water. I'll heal him.”

And hopefully at night Kiba was with them again.

They had left him in the desert in the middle of nowhere. He was certain no bone in his body was whole. Breathing hurt, moving his fingers hurt and even opening his eyes.

He had underestimated his opponents. After he trapped their target five more shinobi appeared and they beat him into a pulp. He lasted five minutes in his transformation. That was nothing. He made a sound as he thought about Akamaru. His dog was in a bad condition. He hoped Ino could help him. She knew medical ninjutsu. Sure she would come up with an idea. He counted on her.

The worst was his broken nose. Without his nose he could not smell how far away he was from his team. Also he had no clue if Ino was unharmed. During his brutal fight she did not reach concioussness again.

He wanted to laugh. Instead worring about himself all his thoughts drifted to Ino. He was such an idiot.

All the years he grew up with Ino. Watched her getting a better kunoichi and even a better friend. Sure, Ino was gossip and loud, emotional and a pain in the ass, but she cared deeply.

He had seen how she took care of everyone. Hours she had sat with Sakura at the tea-house. Both women crying. At Hinata's Birthday she had put together a respectful flower-arrangement to put it on her grave. She was at the gates to see off Choji as he took the mission to Kumo and walked alongside Shikamaru through Konoha to help him train his new vision.

Breathing became harder and it burned in his chest. Kiba was prepared to die. He couldn't do anything against it. The last minutes he had tried to move himself but without chakra he was helpless in the heavy sand. He closed his eyes in hope death would greet him soon.

A cold dog nose burried in his neck. He hadn't the strength to react.


	4. Wonderful Life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Hurts - "Wonderful Life"

Kankuro reached consciousness after three days and was sitting in his bed bored and demanding to go home. Sakura made a check-up and tried to ignore his brooding. He was like every other shinobi. Full of confidence and knowing everything better than the medic.

She took his blood pressure, listened to his lungs, and did some neurological tests. Because he was young and in good health, there was no permanent damage. She was grateful for the small things.

“We're done”, she finished her examination. “If you behave like an adult you can go home tomorrow.” She gave him a stern look, so he wouldn't start arguing. He got the hint.

“You're a life-saver. Second time you rescued me," he said with a smirk. “I'll invite you to dinner.”

She rolled her eyes. “I'm not going on dates with my patients.”

“Leave, Sakura alone, Kankuro," Temari said entering the room. "Or I must remind you, about proper behaviour in front of a lady.”

“I don't know any ladies”, he countered and crossed his arms. “Only brutal kunoichi, who will rip my guts out with their pinky.”

Sakura had to laugh because of the expression on his and Temari's face. Temari reached her brother's bed and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

“You worried us”, she greeted him and sat besides him. “How do you feel?”

“Like I don't belong in a hospital.” Sakura cocked one eyebrow in his direction. “But I'll behave and stay for one night.”

A knock on the door announced another visitor. The door was opened and Shikamaru looked into the room.

“Hey, Shadows!” Kankuro greeted him. “Nice seeing you!”

“I'm glad you're fine”, Shikamaru answered. “I'm sorry, but I need Sakura.”

She turned her head in his direction. “What happened?”

“The others are back from their mission. It's Kiba.”

Without another word she stormed out of the room. She hated this so much.

* * *

From the second Kakashi came back with Kiba she hadn't stopped praying. She prayed the whole time she healed him. Naruto had shared his Chakra with her, so Kiba would survive the long trip back to Suna, to Sakura and her healing hands. Gaara was aware of their emergency and came half way with his cloud made out of sand. 

Now she sat in the waiting room, exhausted, almost completely drained of chakra. She knew rest was inevitable. But first she needed to know if Kiba would survive. She buried her face in her hands, sure she would cry any second. 

"Drink something, Ino."

Shikamaru was standing in front of her with a cup of water. She tried to take the cup, but her hands were shaking. 

"I can't, Shikamaru," she said desperately. 

He just seated himself beside her and helped her drink. She gulped. 

"You need to drink slowly. When was the last time you drank and ate?" 

Even with one eye Shikamaru could look worried. She shook her head. She didn't know. It was all in a blur. All that mattered to her was Kiba. 

"Did you see the enemies?" he now asked after she could take the cup in her hands. 

"Just one. I tried to use my Mind Transfer Technique and I failed. I don't know what happened because I can't remember."

"Hmm." He grabbed his chin deep in thought. "So you don't know what kind of Jutsu was used or how many enemies ambushed you?" 

"Unfortunately, no." She took another sip from her cup. "I thought we got him and in the next moment I woke up with Naruto hovering over me."

He wobbled his head from one side to the other. 

"So we have to wait for Kiba."

* * *

Naruto went to Gaara with Kakashi and reported everything he had seen. He had sent various shadow clones in all directions, each accompanied with one of Kakashi's Ninken, while his former sensei took Pakkun to search for Kiba.

He didn't find a trace of their enemies, not the slightest hint. So he helped Ino to heal Akamaru and later keeping Kiba alive. The wounds from war were still fresh and hurt. Losing another of his friends was out of question.

“I'm thankful you helped, Naruto”, Gaara said, after he was done reporting. “I already informed the other Kage about our progress. We hope that Amegakure and Ishigakure will cooperate.”

“I can go to Amegakure”, Kakashi offered. “I'm sure we will get a kind of agreement.”

Gaara crossed his arms and nodded. “We need the approval of the Hokage first. We've sent shinobi to all the borders.”

“Konoha watches its borders with high alert. I found Kiba near the Lands of Rivers." Kakashi cocked his head to the one side. “But about the shore? Is there a possibility that they travel via sea?”

“The Mizukage will cooperate with Nami no Kuni and control every ship. Hopefully our enemies won't chose this way.”

He wanted to do something instead of discussing possible tactics. There was an unknown enemy they had to stop before it got out of hands. Naruto hated standing still and wait for a genius to come up with a plan.

In moments like these he missed Sasuke even more. He would've stormed out with him to find the traitors. He was sure of it. 

* * *

Shikamaru stood outside the hospital after he persuaded Ino to lay down and rest. She was completely shaken by the mission and unable to comprehend what happened.

He knew that this also was a reaction because she hadn't had alcohol the last few days. He hadn't thought it could get worse. Ino was addicted to alcohol and he hated this. 

He finished his cigarette and wanted to light another. But Temari stopped him. 

"You've had enough."

He didn't argue. He hadn't the strength to win this argument today. 

"How's Kankuro?" 

She puffed out some breath. "He acts like it's just a scratch. I'll never understand men."

Temari did the same, but he didn't comment on this either. The bickering with her was fun, for sure, but he had to focus. They needed to know who the rebels were. 

"Did he say something about his attackers?" 

She nodded and took his hand in hers. The light squeeze she gave him, was all he needed for now.

"He didn't see them. Only one - Ino needs to look in his mind later - but he said his chakra was immense. Also he believes they're Shinobi from Iwa."

"Why?" That was an interesting information.

"They used earth based jutsu. He saw the hand signs and someone, the one who knocked him out, hid underneath him."

"Then we have to investigate in Iwagakure." He sighed. "But it has to be someone from another village. Kurotsuchi is not on friendly terms with Konoha because of Lady Tsunade. And Suna as an ally…"

He didn't need to speak further. Temari knew all of this. 

"Let's talk about this with Gaara and Kakashi. Maybe Kumo can help us."

He kissed her on the back of her hand. 

"Shikamaru-san?" 

A nurse had appeared in front of them. 

"Yes?" 

"Haruno-san wants to see you. She's done treating Inuzuka Kiba."

"Thank you…ehm…"

"Momoka-san", she helped him. "Should I lead the way?" 

"Sure," Temari said and didn't let go of his hand. 

* * *

"Hanabi is capable of leading the clan. I can help her in every way, she needs," Neji repeated for the third time, "I don't know why we discuss this every meeting. She's legally the head of the clan."

"The clan never had a female head. It's unusual and inappropriate", one of the elders answered. 

Neji saw how Hanabi's face got angry. He thought his cousin had a better position than him, but he had been fooled. The elders had an ace up their sleeves. He didn't know who they had in mind. He was curious. 

“It was my sister’s legacy. My father was the head of the clan,” Hanabi interrupted the talk. “So I’ll lead the clan. I’ll fight for it. Because it’s my duty now.”

She stood up and looked down to all the elders, fire in her eyes. Neji was amazed. Hanabi never was like Hinata. She didn’t fear to oppose the elders. She didn’t fear to speak up.

“I may be young and inexperienced, but I’ve Neji on my side, who should lead the clan, but can’t because of your antique rules. I want to change the clan. Get rid of your old thinking. I’ll not step down now matter how often you repeat I’m just a mere woman.”

“You’re a spoiled brat!” said her grandfather. “Like Hinata you could not fulfil all the duties the head of the clan needs to do. Hiashi was too weak to decide on a decent heir. So we need to correct this mistake.”

Neji didn’t see her moving, but in seconds she was in front of the elder, activated her Byakugan and staring into his eyes with fury.

“Don’t you dare to talk about my sister or my father,” she hissed, “they both got through so much pain. Hinata was treated like a nuisance all her life because you all have these high expectations. You hurt Neji with the curse seal, robbed him of a carefree childhood and the place of the head of the clan.” 

She pointed at him. “And my father saw his own brother die, because of the separation between the main and branch family. You’re not the future. I am.”

She stood straight and looked around. 

“If you complain once again I’ll leave the clan”, she threatened all attendants of the meeting. “The Hyuuga clan will not exist when you want to push me around like a doll. So, if anyone has something to say against me, say it now or keep your mouth closed forever.”

Silence was the answer to Hanabi’s speech. Neji thought it was a good moment to support his cousin. He came in a standing position and placed himself behind her.

“Hanabi has my full support,” he said with a calm, but severe voice. “I’ll also leave the clan the second you doubt her authority again.”

He turned to leave the room. Hanabi right behind him. He was proud of her. She would do wonders for the Hyuuga clan. 

Tenten woke up because of a noise on her window. She threw her covers away and walked to it. As she looked outside a familiar face greeted her. She pushed it open.

“That’s a nice surprise,” she greeted Neji, “Had something happened?”

“Want to take a walk?”

“I just need to dress.”

She left the window and looked through her clothes she had just shattered around her room. She didn’t need fancy clothes, but something that was warmer than the shirt and shorts she slept in. She found her pants and pulled them over her legs. One second later she threw over a jacket and jumped out of the window. 

She landed in front of him with a grin on her face. 

“So where do we go?”

Normal people would walk through the forests surrounding Konoha or alongside the water. But Tenten and Neji weren't normal people. They found themselves on the training grounds. He leaned against a wooden pole, while she sat cross-legged in front of him. He had his arms crossed in front of his chest.

She listened as he retold her about the meeting with the Hyuuga elders. Tenten watched how his face lit up the moment he talked how Hanabi took the lead and threatened the elders. Without him voicing it, she knew that he was proud of her.

“So we walked outside and talked a while before coming up with a plan”, he concluded.

“A plan?”

“Yes,” he said smiling. Her heart stopped one second because his smile was rare. She loved to see him smile. Not only because it was rare but he shared this with her. He trusted her enough to let his guard down. Neji was seldom relaxed.

“She wants to get rid of the curse seal, completely. She doesn't want a replacement. Hanabi wants to unite the main and branch family.”

“But how?”

“It's forbidden in our clan that members from the main and the branch family marry. Hanabi knew at least two pairs, who have a secret relationship. She wants to push that they marry.”

“That's a bold move.”

“First she suggested it was easier if I married her.” He hesitated as he saw her flinch. “But she knows about us, so she dropped the idea.”

Tenten blushed. Hearing Neji saying those words made her heart flutter. They never talked about their relationship. She didn't want to push him. She enjoyed when he kissed and hugged her. His lips felt so good and when his fingers traced her face, she closed her eyes to imprint his movements into her memories. 

He looked pleased with himself, and relieved as he sat on the ground. She could've looked at him forever. He was a handsome man. His elegant but prominent jawbone showed his strength and determination. 

Her hand reached to touch him. Her fingertips softly mapping his face. She took his hands. They were full of cuts and calluses, and were a sign of the fights he won. 

He was beautiful in every aspect. First it was his character she had felt in love with. Later she started recognizing his eyes. It wasn't the colour of his Buyakugan. In his eyes she could see so much pain. She wanted to heal him, take him in her arms and stroke his hair. 

His lips touched hers and then he laid her back into the grass. He didn't stop kissing, but used his tongue. She felt her skin burning by his touch. Slowly his lips made the way down her neck. The cool breeze of the wind made her shiver. 

"Are you okay, Tenten?"

"Continue," she whispered. "It feels good."

She was surprised to see a smirk on his face. Encouraged he took one finger and let it casually play with her breast. Tenten moaned as he sucked on her nipple still covered by the fabric. 

It was the first time he gave her so much attention. Before he surely had used his hands to grab her on the hips or waist, so she was closer to him, but this was so much better. Much better than the kisses or hugs. 

The stars were watching them as they went further, showing their love for each other on a whole different level. 

* * *

Temari was sitting in her office and tried not to listen to Kankuro and Gaara arguing. She wanted to write a formal request for the Raikage, asking for help with the investigations in Iwagakure. It didn't help that her brothers talked this loudly. Normally Gaara was calm and didn't scream, but she knew why he was this angry today. 

Kankuro wasn't fully healed yet and Sakura insisted on giving him a break of at least two weeks. Gaara naturally followed her advice and had taken Kankuro from the mission roster. That was when their arguing started. 

"I won't accept this!" 

"I'm the Kazekage," Gaara answered, "you do as you're told."

"I'm your brother. Why are you doing this to me?" 

She had enough. It was hard enough to see Shikamaru off today because his team was needed in Konoha. With Kiba not able to fight and Ino still drinking so many amounts of alcohol, that Temari noticed it, he needed to go. She knew he was worried about his friends, but part of her wanted him to stay in Suna. 

She threw the pen away, got out of her chair and opened the door of her room. With wide steps reached the Kazekage's office and entered with rage.

"I swear to all gods, if you two don't stop screaming, I'm going to murder you and take over as Kazekage," she growled in the directions of her brothers. 

They turned their faces to her, unimpressed. Gaara crossed his arms. Kankuro smirked. 

"You're always so bitchy the moment your lover boy leaves Suna." Kankuro's smirk got wider. 

"He has a name," she said through gritted teeth. "And I wanted to write a formal request to the Raikage. We need his help with Iwa."

"Thanks, Temari," Gaara simply said and looked back at Kankuro. "You can travel to Kumo and deliver the message. In war you worked with Omoi."

With this request Kankuro's mood lightened. "Is that the reason you wanted me to stay?" 

"No," Gaara said and his face got soft. "I want you to recover. But I know you won't listen to me. So I'm going to send you outside the village on a simple mission.”

Temari sighed. She loved her brothers, but sometimes she really wanted to hit them. 

* * *

“Could you just for once not come back from a mission with several broken bones and Akamaru hurt, so I don’t need to patch him up?” Hana asked rhetorically as she looked at Akamaru’s broken leg. 

Ino did a decent job healing his Ninken but still his sister had to redo her treatment because Ino wasn’t a vet. So he listened to her scolding and tried to calm down his dog. Akamaru whined just a little but Kiba didn’t like it. 

“I didn’t run into the enemy on purpose. And I’m also not responsible for Ino’s jutsu missing. I couldn’t run, so I fought my way out.”

Hana snorted. “You just acted reckless. Again.”

He rubbed a hand through his face. The trip back to Konoha had been exhausting. They took longer than usual because he wasn’t able to run. Most times Kakashi, Shikamaru or Naruto carried him on their backs. Sakura had carried Akamaru with her monstrous strength. He had hated the fact to be such a burden to his teammates. 

The worry about Ino clinged to him. She was so quiet and withdrawn into herself. Sakura told him that Ino had no aftereffects from her backfired jutsu. She would be fine.

Until the next time she grabbed a bottle of wine.

“We’re done,” Hana announced, "you two rest for now. I’ll cook you something. But first go to sleep.”

Hana carried Akamaru to his bedroom. Kiba let himself fall on the cool sheets and closed his eyes, dozing off in an instant. 

* * *

Kankuro followed her through the village with a grim look on his face. She was sure he was a nice guy, but they never had a conversation that consisted of more than a few words.

He wanted to speak with Darui. It seemed urgent. Therefore she wasted no time and walked directly to the Raikage's office. 

"Raikage-sama, we've a guest."

"Hello, Karui," he greeted her. "And hi Kankuro. You've a message?"

Kankuro nodded and handed him a scroll. "We need a favour. As you know I was attacked by rebels. Konoha had sent reinforcements and their team also was crushed. We suggest the rebels once belonged to Iwagakure." 

Darui opened the scroll and read through it. His brows furrowed.

Karui was shocked about this development. Her village had its own problems with rebel pockets. They got help from Kiri and Konoha. What if Iwa added more problems? 

Peace was in reach but its cost still was high. Many Shinobi had died, much more were dying because they weren't able to forget and adapt to their new life. She also struggled with the changes. She just wanted peace. 

"I see," Darui answered. "It's a big favour you ask. We're on friendly terms with Iwagakure. The moment we interfere Kurotsuchi likely will write us on her black list."

Kankuro bowed. "We know this, Darui. But it's urgent. How can we build the Shinobi Alliance if there's no trust between the five hidden villages? 

"I understand this. But why don't you send Temari?" 

"Because Iwa didn't answer our request for a meeting."

Kankuro saw that his last words struck like lightning. Darui pinched his eyes together and his face hardened. Karui stiffened. 

"How long?" 

"We waited two weeks. After we didn't get an answer we sent another scroll. It came back unopened."

The former Raikage was always on the edge of anger. Darui was calmer. He clenched one fist. 

"Karui search for Omoi and take him with you to Iwa. We need to prevent more damage. Also pack gifts for the Tsuchikage."

"But what about the rebel pockets? We're already short of Shinobi."

Kankuro saw that Darui was thinking. 

"Can you stay, Kankuro?" 

"I was ordered to stay as long as needed."

This was true. Gaara knew Darui would send his best Shinobi to Iwa. However it took a long time to convince him. 

"Then it's settled. Report back before you leave. I'll prepare a letter."

Chouji saw Karui approaching the watch post, followed by an oddly familiar face. He didn't know why Kankuro was here, because Suna was a six days walk away, but he suggested something had happened. He nudged Omoi's arm so he would stop complaining about the weather.

He wasn't in the mood for an angry Karui. Omoi triggered her anger in seconds. He was prepared for the worst. The faces of his fellow Shinobi were worried. So it was no good news. 

"Omoi, don't stand there like an idiot. We go to Iwa," Karui shouted. 

Her teammate had the look of pure horror on his face. "There's gonna be a war," he whispered, "I knew the peace would shatter."

"Get yourself together." Kankuro growled. "It's always the same with you."

"What happens in Iwa?" Chouji asked. 

He knew that Konoha and Iwa weren't on friendly terms after the war. Old conflicts lingered in the air and the new Tsuchikage was full of sorrow. Lady Tsunade wasn't able to rescue her grandfather. Kurotsuchi had chosen to punish Konoha for this. They doubled the prices for goods and made it harder for Shinobi to enter the Hidden Village and the Land of Earth in particular. 

Kumogakure also had lost its Kage but they took a different route. They strengthened their bonds with Konoha. That was one of the reasons he stayed here, far away from home. He wanted to achieve peace. 

"I was ambushed, and also Konoha's Shinobi," Kankuro answered. 

"Suna and Konoha both believe that the attackers were rogue ninja from Iwa,"Karui added, "that's why we investigate."

Chouji instantly got into a bad mood. He was stuck in Kumo and on the other side of their continent it started to erupt. He wasn't scared of a new war itself. He was scared about losing his loved ones. Sure he would break apart completely this time around. 

"Is someone hurt?" 

"Ino and Kiba were wounded, but they're back on track, save in Konoha."

He dropped his shoulders and exhaled. 

"We'll go now." Karui put a hand on his arm. "Watch Kumo for me, big boy."

Chouji noticed how his face reddened. 

"Stay safe, Karui."

She grabbed Omoi by his collar and pulled him away. 

"Nice girl that Karui," Kankuro teased him. "Are you two dating?" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the kudos! 
> 
> I would love to hear what you think about the story in the comments :)


	5. The Pretender

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Song: Foo Fighters - "The Pretender"

_“Kiba, run!” Naruto shouted as the ten-tails started shooting wooden spears._

_He could see how his friend tried to catch all the spears himself with the nine-tails cloak. Everything was illuminated in red and orange around Naruto. Kiba knew he should listen to him, but his feet felt like they were glued to the ground._

_He was so exhausted after the last days. Not only his body wasn’t able to perform more jutsu because he was drained. Also emotionally he couldn’t comprehend all the things that happened._

_The war had been in their favour for a couple of days and then everything went haywire. Yesterday - or was it the day before? - Shino got a deadly wound and died before he even touched the ground. His bugs didn’t have the energy to protect him. Kiba just stood beside him as Hinata suddenly cried their teammates' names._

_“Come on, Kiba,” another voice said. He turned his head and saw Ino looking in his direction. She grabbed his hand, pulled him with her. Out of danger._

He flung his eyes open and stared at the ceiling. His heart was out of his normal rhythm. It was hard to breath. Kiba’s hand searched for Akamaru before his fingers brushed the skin of the woman lying with him in this bed.

He had forgotten he wasn’t at home. Therefore he was without his ninken.

Kiba remembered he got really drunk after visiting Kurenai and Mirai. They had talked about the old times. About the times with Team 8. He had gone home and dropped Akamaru and then walked into the next bar.

Normally he just drank a beer or two before he started flirting with a woman, if he even drank at all. But this time he needed stronger booze and started with sake.

Carefully he looked at the woman that had passed out and was snoring really loud. He had his pattern, and he couldn’t do anything about this. They were blond with a small figure, but wide breasts. Kiba knew that he searched for a replacement because he couldn’t approach Ino.

The woman didn’t move as he quietly put on his clothes. After making sure she would not wake, he opened her window and jumped out on the street. Maybe he understood now why Shikamaru smoked cigarettes. Something to calm his nerves would clearly help him.

* * *

Ino looked at the clock above the door and puffed out some air, frustrated, she still had to work two more hours. She was tired. The last night she had drunk so much - again - that she barely made it out of bed to work in her family’s flower shop. But her mother was busy until noon and therefore she had to fill the gap.

But she was grateful for the small things. In her condition she wouldn’t have been able to work at the T&I Force today or go on missions outside the village. Selling and arranging flowers was a job she could do in her sleep.

The bell announced a new customer and Ino let a professional smile plaster her face. The smile got wider as she saw Shikamaru approaching.

“I don’t know when I last saw you walking into the flower shop, Shikamaru”, she greeted him. “Want something for Temari?”

He blushed a little and put a hand on his neck. “It’s not for Temari. Gaara needs something.”

“Gaara? Want to impress the Kazekage, so he won’t kill you, because you sleep with his sister?” She grinned. “I’m not sure if we have a flower that has the right meaning for this, but I’ll help you not to get murdered.”

Shikamaru blushed deeper. “Dammit, Ino. That’s not your concern,” he sighed. “Gaara collects and breeds Cacti. Therefore he needs some special fertilizer and he isn’t able to find it in Suna.”

Ino’s mouth fell open. She couldn’t believe what Shikamaru was telling her. Gaara of the Sand, feared because he once was a jinchuriki with an unbearable blood lust, collected Cacti? She never considered the possibility he could have a pastime.

“Tell me what he needs and I can send it to him.”

* * *

Akamaru was pissed because Kiba had slept outside and got drunk. His dog didn’t give him any attention while they walked through the forests in Konoha. Kiba just walked and hoped Akamaru would follow him. He dwelled on his thoughts.

The dream last night was haunting him. He still felt the fear, remembering the smell of blood, fire and so many other scents, that were stored in his nose, and all the dirt clinging to his skin. Ino’s hand was the only good thing to remember. He wanted to hold her hand one more time. To make sure it was the same. But she was out of reach.

He reached a nearby river and stumbled across Sakura. She was sitting on a large boulder, her feet in the cold water and had her eyes closed. Kiba didn’t want to disturb her. Obviously she looked for some quiet and peace.

“Don’t go, Kiba,” Sakura said to stop him.

“Nah, I’ll go. You surely want to be alone.” He shrugged his shoulders as she opened her eyes.

“I wanted to talk to you anyway.”

Akamaru made the decision and walked to Sakura. He greeted her with happy tail wagging and a bark. She fondled him behind his ears, which Akamaru forced to lay his head on Sakura’s lap.

He placed himself beside her and took off his shoes. The water was really, really cold and he squealed as he dipped his toes inside. Sakura laughed.

“Always thought you were a tough guy.”

“It’s still winter. Why aren’t you cold?” he asked curiously.

“Because it’s training. I train to focus my chakra in my feet.”

“You tricked me, Sakura!” he exclaimed and started to infuse chakra. “I thought the water is warm enough so I wouldn't freeze to death.”

Sakura laughed again and continued to stroke Akamaru. “When will you tell her?” she suddenly asked with a serious tone in her voice.

Kiba looked at her confused because he didn’t know what she was talking about.

“Tell who, what?”

“Ino, that you love her.”

He snapped his head to the side.

Why did everybody know how he felt about Ino? Had he written it on his face?

Kiba never talked with anybody about such private matters. He only ever had talked with Hinata about this. And Hinata never gossiped. That was against her kind-hearted nature. The other person he had talked about this was Shikamaru and he couldn't care less about the private affairs of others.

“Don’t look at me like this, Kiba. I can see it. In your eyes, how you behave around her.”

“I can’t tell her. She doesn’t love me the same way. She liked Sasuke and Sai this way.”

Kiba could hear the choking noise Sakura made because he mentioned Sasuke.

_You’re an idiot._

“Sorry, Sakura. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“It’s okay, Kiba. I have to accept that Sasuke is dead. And I know he loved me. He confessed this to me the moment he died.” She bit her lip. “I came to rescue Ino right after he died in my arms in war. I still had his blood under my nails. I don’t know if you remember this.”

Kiba swallowed hard. “I remember every second of the war. Most times while I sleep.”

Sakura sighed and took her feet out of the water. She slipped back into her shoes.

“I’m really worried about, Ino. She’s my best friend and she drinks so much alcohol. I know I’m not better. I work so much I sometimes faint after my double shift is over,” she shook her head. “But I’ve Naruto and Kakashi-sensei looking after me. My parents support me. But Ino? Her mother’s still grieving the death of her husband. Shikamaru works so much and has his own issues. Chouji is in Kumo. So, I need your help.”

“How could I possibly help her, Sakura? She avoids me.”

“Invite her to dinner. I know she liked it when you invited her in Suna.”

That took him by surprise. “Really?”

“Yes,” she said and put a hand on his shoulder. “Just take your time. I’m sure Ino will see how important you’re for her. She almost cried after they brought you back to Suna.”

Then she stood up and disappeared into the trees.

* * *

“You should get some rest, Ino,” her mother said after she took over the reins in the flower shop. “You didn’t sleep well, my little daisy.”

“I’m okay, Mum. Stop worrying.”

She brushed her mother’s hand on her arm away and pulled over her coat. Maybe she should eat something. Her clothes started to get looser because she ate unsteadily. Ino always struggled to eat when she was upset or stressed. And the times got wilder with every day. The signs were unmissable.

“Are you home tonight, Ino? It's been a long time since we ate together.”

“I’m not sure. Shikamaru wanted to see me.”

It wasn’t a lie per se. Shikamaru had asked her to meet in the evening. But she had refused, saying she needed to work. He knew she had found a really lame excuse. He worked at the Hokage tower and knew when she was working with Morino Ibiki.

Her mother looked at her concerned but just slumped her shoulders and continued counting the money in the cash register. Ino felt guilty. She knew her mother wanted to spend time with her.

“I’ve time tomorrow, kachan,” she offers. "Pudding sounds nice to me.”

Her mother smiled at her. “You’re so grown up. I know it's a bother to spend time with your mother."

"Don't say things like this," Ino answered and put a streak of her hair behind her ear. "I love you, kachan. I always will."

"Go, my little daisy or your mother starts blushing."

Ino raised her hand to say goodbye, and then she turned around, and almost fell because she ran into someone.

"You don't have to throw yourself at me, Ino," a familiar voice said.

"Oh, it's you, Kiba."

"Sakura said you are free after noon. So I wanted to ask if you want to join me. I need something to eat."

Ino wanted to say 'no' but her mother inferred.

"Aren't you Inuzuka Tsume's boy?"

"Yes," Kiba answered. "Ino and I went to the academy together."

"I'm really happy she has such good-looking friends that invite her to lunch."

Ino was sure she blushed from head to toe. Kiba looked a little bit shocked, but seemed to find his composure faster than Ino.

"I owe Ino a lunch. She helped Akamaru on our last mission."

Ino saw how her mother clasped her hands together and made a sweet sigh. She put a hand on her forehead, sure she would die of embarrassment every second. When did her mother decide to be interested in her non-existent love life?

"That's so nice of you."

"I go now, kachan. See you later."

She stormed out of the shop, Kiba right behind her. She was sure he snorted because of amusement.

Kiba let Ino decide the restaurant. Therefore he wasn't surprised to stand in front of YakinikuQ, where she always ate with her teammates. He ordered meat for three people, because Akamaru also needed something to eat. He put some meat on the small fire and took a sip of his juice.

Ino had dark circles under her eyes. She tried to hide it under make up, but he could see behind this facade. Also she smelled like alcohol again.

"I'm sorry for my mother. I know she's embarrassing."

He snorted and put his glass back on the table. Then he took the chopsticks and turned the meat on the other side.

"Your mother just wants you to be happy. And she said I'm good looking."

Ino widened her eyes because of his statement. He heard her sigh.

"Why are you always like this, Kiba?"

"Like what?" he said and put a few pieces of meat on a plate, so it cooled down for Akamaru. His dog already was impatient.

"You make dumb jokes in every situation. Even if it's totally inappropriate. How can you be so full of joy?"

This conversation started to lead into a direction that felt uncomfortable. He wanted to ease her mind. Not talking about serious topics. So he went with the flow.

"I want people to feel better around me," he said and let the meat for Akamaru disappear under the table. "We all have lost something or someone. And it hurts."

Without a warning Ino grabbed his hand. Her touch felt good and he didn't want her to stop touching him.

"Thank you," she whispered. "At least one thing hasn't changed."

He was disappointed as her hand let go of him, but he gave her a smile.

"At your service, mylady."

That made the corners of her mouth rise for a fraction of a second.

"The meat is ready. We should eat."

Lunch with Kiba was nice and made her heart lighter. It reminded her of old times with Shikamaru and Chouji. For once she could forget her loneliness.

She didn't notice how time flew. Two hours later they left the restaurant - Kiba insisted paying for the meal - and headed to one of the rivers. Ino was so full with food and yawned.

"Already bored of me?" Kiba asked and grinned.

She rolled her eyes. "I ate so much and now I'm tired."

"I can bring you home and you could take a nap."

"Do I look like Shikamaru?" she wanted to know and arched her eyebrow.

"Shikamaru is a good looking guy, but you're much nicer to look at. He's not as beautiful as you. And I'm sure he wants to grow a beard. Do you also want a beard?"

That caught her off guard and she chuckled. She had to hold her stomach because laughter shook her. His remark came totally out of nowhere. Kiba was such a goofball.

Also he said she was beautiful.

"Oh, Kiba. Please stop," she squeezed out. "Shikamaru with a beard. This surely will look ridiculous."

"Maybe Temari likes this look? An eye-patch and a beard?" He sounded thoughtful. "Does the Kazekage's sister have the hots for pirates?"

Ino snorted and stopped walking. Her eyes were filled with tears. She wiped them away with her hand.

"I don't know about Temari. But did you know that Gaara has a thing for Cacti?"

He squinted his eyes together.

"Really?"

"Yes, Shikamaru visited me today and asked for some fertilizer for Cacti."

"I hope you helped him. I'm sure Gaara is not that amused about the fact his sister has a thing for Shikamaru."

Ino shook her head. "Shika is a good guy. Everybody loves him. You cannot hate him."

"That's true", Kiba answered and buried his hands inside the pockets of his pants. "How's Chouji doing in Kumo?"

“He likes it a lot and at the same time misses Konoha. I think he has a thing for that girl from Kumo. Karui is her name.”

He could hear the sad tone in her voice. Kiba guessed that Ino feared her friend would stay in Kumo after his mission was over. Shikamaru often was in Suna, her other teammate in Kumo. It looked like the Ino-Shika-Cho-tradition came to an end. And she didn’t like it.

“I’ll show you something nice, Ino.”

His favourite spot in Konoha was found in the outskirts of Konoha. There weren’t any visitors in this specific place because the clan that once lived here was now extinct.

One day when he was alone with Akamaru, strolling through the village, training his tracking skills and strengthening his jutsu, he discovered a lake. Pain’s attack didn’t destroy this spot.

Completely lost in thought he recognized too late the absolute horror on Ino’s face. Her eyes were locked on the Uchiha’s clan crest at the entrance. He heard her steps slowing down until they stopped.

Kiba turned around and saw her trembling.

He realised his mistake, wanted to touch her, comfort her, also apologise, because he was a dense idiot.

Instead she turned on her heels and ran away from him.

“Ino!” he shouted, immediately following her. “Stop, Ino! Please!”

Akamaru was faster and reached her within seconds. He barked at Ino, trying to catch her skirt. Kiba saw the disaster unfold before his eyes.

Not only did his dog rip her coat appart, no, it was even worse. Ino fell to the ground because of the changed momentum. Her ninja instincts didn’t rescue her.

He heard a nasty cracking noise and a loud scream.

He really was an idiot.

Ino was sure the day couldn’t become worse.

She had closed her eyes and tried not to focus on the pain in her wrist or her knees. Tears were rolling down her face. She was utterly embarrassed.

The shock of facing the Uchiha compound still bothered a small part of her, the rest of her mind was laughing at her for falling down like a toddler, who walked for the first time.

“Ino,” Kiba said and knelt beside her. “Are you hurt?”

His damn dog started sniffing at her face and his tongue licked her ear. She squealed.

“Go away, Akamaru,” Kiba scolded him. “Please talk to me Ino. I’m really, really sorry.”

She decided it was safe to sit up and wanted to use her right hand. That was a bad idea. A sharp pain was sent through her whole arm. She hissed and more tears formed in her eyes. Kiba touched her shoulders and hugged her.

“Damn. I’m a total moron. I didn’t want to hurt you. Please forgive me, Ino.”

She clinged with her good hand into his shirt, not sure if she wanted to laugh or cry or both. His embrace was helping her to calm down, and collected her feelings together. Kiba also whispered several apologies, interrupted by cursing himself. The pain slowly subsided. The urge to cry also disappeared.

“It’s okay, Kiba,” she managed to say.

He loosened his tight hug, still holding her gently by the shoulders. She looked at her wrist.

“I think I need to go to the hospital.”

She didn't refuse that Kiba brought her to the hospital. Ino's wrist had swollen double the size and was in different colours from blue to red and violet. He had stopped apologizing and walked silently at her side.

"You can go home, Kiba. I just search for Sakura and let her heal me."

"I'll stay, Ino. Why should I leave you?"

"You don't feel comfortable."

He grinned. "Because I'm an idiot and blame myself for your injury. Also I want to buy you some ice-cream."

"Okay, I can't say no to ice-cream,” she answered and entered the hospital. “I hope you have enough money, because my wrist really hurts.”

Sakura greeted her with a polite smile, until she saw her wrist.

"What did you do?"

"It was my fault. We took a stroll around the village and then Akamaru…,” Kiba started explaining, but Ino stopped him.

"It's nothing, Sakura. I was just a little clumsy and fell on my wrist."

"I will heal this as best as I can but I think you can't work for at least two weeks,” her friend said. “Just sit still for a second. It will hurt a bit.”

Ino could feel how the littles bones and joints healed and flipped back into the right position. She hissed because at one point it almost made her jump from the chair. Kiba offered his hand, she could squeeze and also Akamaru - who normally wasn’t allowed in the hospital - put his head on her lap.

Sakura applied an ointment and put a supporting bandage on her wrist after she had finished using her chakra to heal the damage.

“Where done for now. I’ll give you some painkillers for the night.”

“Thank you, Sakura.”

“Every time, Ino. But please don’t repeat this too soon,” she turned to Kiba. “Please bring her home. After my chakra treatment it’s possible she will faint.”

“Sure, Sakura.”

They reached Ino’s home within minutes and Kiba was sad they would say goodbye. All he wanted to do was give Ino a good time. A distraction from her dark thoughts and sorrow. Instead he had hurt her - or better his stupid dog - and she couldn’t work for the next two weeks.

Kiba hoped badly she would not numb her pain with alcohol again. Ino behaved so incredibly reckless. Alcoholism was widespread amongst Shinobi. There was no denying the truth. The three shinobi prohibitions had a reason.

He also was behaving self-destructing. He had woken up this morning in a foreign bed, with an unknown woman. He didn’t even remember the sex. But that was the whole point for him. Having a warm body in bed, hearing the woman underneath him make these wonderful noises, while he felt less alone.

He shook his head. He needed to stop. The moment his mother or sister would find out what he had done with various, civilian women, he was a dead man. Mostly because it didn’t help him anymore. The nightmares were still there, haunting him and the whole in his heart still bled in silence.

“I think it’s time to say goodbye,” Ino interrupted his self-pity.

“But I still owe you ice-cream.”

She chuckled. “Since I have a lot of time the next few weeks, we can grab some ice-cream tomorrow. If you’re not busy.”

“Is this a date?” he asked and wiggled his eyebrows. Ino burst into laughter.

“Kiba!” she said and touched his arm. “I think it’s two friends having a good time with each other.”

He crossed his arms and touched his chin.

“I think I can agree to this,” he answered and smiled at her. “Tell me a time and Akamaru and I will take you to the best ice-cream place in Konoha.”

Kiba expected her to tell him a time, but instead she stood on her toes, leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek.

“Around noon. See you, Kiba.”

Then she opened the door and disappeared, while he raised his hand to his cheek.

“Bye, Ino,” he whispered. “Did you see this, Akamaru? She kissed my cheek!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short kiss on the cheek for Kiba. But with the next chapter we will return to the political issues in the ninja world.


	6. Perfect Illusion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Lady Gaga - "Perfect Illusion"

Gaara got nervous. Most times he kept his calm, and decided after thinking through the details. This time he had to act soon and fast, because Iwagakure seemed to be planning something. Since Kankuro had been attacked everything was going to hell.

Various reports from Konoha made him antsy. They have always been close to Ishi and Kusa and suddenly both countries decided to sever the bonds between them. They dissolved contracts, and, as one of the reports from Konoha said, started to work with Iwa.

He was worried about his own allies. The Land of Rivers was suspiciously quiet those days. Since the war ended they had agreed to cooperate, because they’ve seen that the strength of all ninja and samurai around the world was invincible. They were stronger together. And most of it was because of Naruto.

He stood up and decided to do something. Kankuro was currently in Kumo and had sent word that Karui and Omoi would talk with Iwa. Gaara hoped it worked as planned, because the yet building peace was something he wanted to maintain.

He left his office to search for his sister. She needed to investigate inside the Land of Rivers.

* * *

  
Ino hadn't had a day off since the war. She had worked in the flower shop, in the Intel Division, was busy taking over the reigns of the Yamanaka clan and in between tried to help in the hospital. Her day was filled with so many activities, she never took the time to reflect.

Therefore it crashed down on her now. She laid in her bed unable to move.

Last night she had tried to sleep without alcohol because she had to take painkillers. She had enough medical knowledge to be reasonable at some point.

She looked at her wrist. It hurt a bit but she had to smile. Yesterday was a wonderful day.

Kiba was a nice guy. She had liked him before and found his presence reassuring. He smiled every time she saw him. He hadn't changed. He had lost his teammates, his friends. He was left behind. She could understand him. But he never struggled.

Ino still had Shikamaru and Chouji, but both of them were out of reach. They had found something to feel less miserable. A goal they wanted to reach.

She was wallowing in pain, shame and sorrow. The pain about her lost father, the shame she couldn't sleep at night without alcohol and sorrow because she hadn't the will to live.

So many times she had thought about leaving this world. She continued either way. Not sure where her place was.

She turned her head to the picture that was on her nightstand. How hopeful and happy her team was back in those days. She wanted to go back.

She closed her eyes. She thought about Kiba before sleep caught her again.

* * *

His skin was itching because of all the tension in the room. Granny Tsunade had called him in her office. She was sitting at her desk and tapping her finger impatiently on the surface. Her face was distorted because of anger. Making the Hokage angry means something serious had happened.

Naruto had heard the rumors about broken contracts with their allies, that Iwagakure held a grudge against them because the Tsuchikage died in the war. He also could feel the anticipation of his friends. Most times he saw Shikamaru and Sakura, they looked worried. Since they worked close with the Hokage there had to be a reason.

“Why does he always come late”, Tsunade grumbled. “It’s not like we’ve all time to wait for him.”

The door opened and Shikamaru entered the office. He had a scroll in his hand. His face had a blank expression. Naruto knew his friend well enough to see behind this. He had bad news.

“Lady Tsunade, we’ve a message from Suna.”

She sighed and closed her eyes. “What happened, Shikamaru. Please tell me there wasn’t another ambush.”

“Gaara is worried about the Land of Rivers. He asks for a joint mission.” Shikamaru walked to the desk and handed her the scroll. “The news about Ishi and Kusa are worrying him. He’ll send Temari.”

“Then I think it’s the best you’ll go. Since we don’t have enough Shinobi, I know you work quickly. Send word to Gaara about this. I trust you, Shikamaru.”

“What’s going on, Granny Tsunade?” Naruto finally burst out. “What’s this about Ishi and Kusa? Are we preparing for war?”

He was fed up with waiting for information. He could feel all the emotions in the room. The world was changing again. Last time they hid something from him was as he was sent away to train with Killer B. And he still was furious.

“We have to wait for Kakashi”, was her answer. “Because I’ve got a mission for both of you.”

* * *

In Kumogakure things also were tense. After the departure of Karui and Omoi the rebel pockets decided to make a move. Kankuro had just killed around twenty missing nin and there were more flooding the terrain. Chouji got his back and was sending their enemies flying. He surely enjoyed the change in routines, but it was tough to fight after he got wounded. He had to admit a longer rest would've been better.

He finally captured one of their enemies alive in Sanshōuo, while Chouji and his other comrades took care of the rest. Kankuro wiped the sweat from his face.

"Is someone hurt?" he asked and looked around.

"Just some cuts", Chouji answered. "Let's bring this traitor inside the village for interrogation."

Kankuro watched the man from the Yamanaka clan look into the mind of the captured man. He had refused to talk, so they needed more advanced methods to get information out of him. The next step would be torture and he didn't approve of this.

He was a cruel man if he had to act like this, but the things he had seen in war made him softer. Force wasn't the answer. It created more hatred. Hatred that could lead to the next war.

"He was hired by Iwagakure", the fellow ninja from the Yamanaka clan announced. "I just saw that he got a great amount of money handed from an Iwa shinobi.”

“Do we know the Iwa shinobi?”

“It was Akasutchi.”

The silence that followed was thick and dangerous. Iwagakure had started a war. They needed to act.

“We better contact the other Kage”, said Chouji.

* * *

“I sure will go to the Land of Rivers. I also can see that something is happening”, Temari agreed and crossed her arms. “Are you okay to stay behind?”

“Don’t worry, Temari. Kankuro will come back soon. So I’m not alone. I can defend myself and call for help if needed.”

“I make sure I won’t stay long.” She gave him a crooked smile.

Gaara put his hands together. He was really tired. The stress started to rise and he was haunted by insomnia again. He wouldn’t tell his siblings. They worried so easily.

“I don’t know who will be sent from Konoha. But please behave.”

“It will be Shikamaru. Tsunade knows he’s the best shinobi for a mission like this.”

Temari’s smile changed. She always smiled like this when she thought about Shikamaru. He made her really happy and that also made Gaara happy.

He feared the day she would finally decide to move to Konoha. It was always nice having her around. She supported him in every aspect and made sure Suna was safe. But he would never stand in her way. Because he also supported her life-decisions.

“How is he? Does he adapt to his eyesight ?”

She shrugged her shoulders. "It’s better than before, but he still has a long way to go. And it bothers him that he can’t go on real missions.”

Gaara nodded. “Next time he’s in Suna I want him to have dinner with us.”

His sister looked at him shocked and blushed.

“You don’t have to do this”, she answered flustered. “You know him already. He’s no stranger.”

“But he’s important for you, Temari. He makes you happy. He’s family. Am I right?”

Before she could give an answer the door burst open.

“We have a message from Kumogakure,” the Chunin announced.

“What does it say?”

“The rebels in Kumo got their orders from Iwagakure.”

Gaara and Temari shared a shocked look. The Chuunin handed him the scroll. He didn’t need more information. He knew the signs of war.

“I will head to the Land of Rivers early tomorrow,” Temari said. “And order Kankuro back home. We need to prepare.”

With this his sister left the room. Gaara buried his face in his hands. He didn’t like this.

* * *

Karui and Omoi were greeted friendly at the entrance of Iwagakure, but like her teammate she recognized the stares and looks that followed them. It was completely different from the other hidden villages. The atmosphere was threatening.

She had to swallow hard as one of the men, who were looking at them with anger, shouted: “Traitors!”

Seemed all assumptions regarding Iwagakure and Kurotsuchi were right. Or why else would the people behave this in front of them?

Karui knew that the Hidden Stone loved their previous Tsuchikage Onoki. He was one of the pillars of their strength. With his Kekkei Touta they thought Iwa was invincible. The death of their beloved leader made them full of anger and sorrow.

She shared these feelings. The death of their Raikage was also an effect of the war. But she was able to see beyond and behind her emotions. She was Darui’s right hand woman now and he wanted to achieve peace. His personality was more humble and reserved. Therefore she supported him in every decision.

Finally they reached the Tsuchikage’s office.

There were a lot of guards standing outside and inside. More than usual.

Karui started to get suspicious. Why did Kurotsuchi need so much protection?

“Hello Karui, Omoi. Nice seeing you again.”

She bowed. “I’m grateful that you invited us into your village, Tsuchikage-sama.”

“There’s no need for formalities. Sit down.”

After Karui seated herself she shared a long look with Omoi. He also was surprised. She behaved strangely. Kurotsuchi wasn’t nice. This was too friendly.

“We have a letter from Darui. He needs an appointment."

The Tsuchikage took the scroll and read through it. First her face showed anger until she started laughing and tears fell down her face. That was an odd reaction.

She wiped the tears from her face and straightened her back. Kurotsuchi no longer held back her true intentions.

“I’m glad you’re here today. Actually, I wanted to ask a favour from your Raikage. But it seems you decided to take sides with Konoha and Suna.”

“What do you mean, Kurotsuchi?” Omoi asked, since Karui was too shocked to talk at all.

“I want to kill Senju Tsunade, the Slug Princess, the current Hokage. Because she deserves to die.”

* * *

  
Kankuro didn’t need a written order from the Kazekage. He knew he needed to go back to Suna. He looked at Chouji.

“I think you should also head back to your village,” Kankuro said, while they walked out the Raikage building. “Konoha needs you.”

“But Kumo also needs us. Karui and Omoi aren’t back from Iwagakure. And the rebel pockets are still attacking the village.”

“Okay, fine. Do what you need to do. But I’ll head back to Suna. It’s a six day long trip. And I’m sure Gaara sends Temari to the Land of Rivers.”

“How do you know this?” Chouji asked, surprised.

“He’s my brother. I always know what he’s thinking.”

With these words he left Chouji and went to his accommodation. Kankuro knew it was time to prepare for war. Iwa had made the first move.

He wondered what kind of shogi piece Shikamaru had in mind for him.

* * *

"I need you two to investigate," Tsunade announced since Kakashi finally arrived. "Naruto, you go to Kusagakure and after that to Ishi. We need someone to calm the waves in both countries. Make clear we are not opposed that they work with Iwa, but offer them to join the Shinobi Alliance."

"But I thought it would need more preparation for the Shinobi Alliance?" he exclaimed.

"Tetsu no Kuni had finished preparations. We want to meet for the first time in one month," Shikamaru explained. "Mifune will send invitations to every country and their respective capitals. But the smaller countries will be suspicious. So we need someone to talk to them. Making them agree."

"And I'll go to Ame", Kakashi noted, looking up from his book. “Because I know the terrain.”

“That’s right, Kakashi”, answered Tsunade. “Since Ame does not make allies with any of the great nations, we urgently need them to cooperate with the Shinobi Alliance.”

Naruto listened closely to the rest of the conversation and the plans of how he should approach the leaders in the villages. He wasn’t as skilled as Shikamaru with diplomatic talk, but if he wanted to be Hokage he needed to learn. He sometimes missed the old times where he would hunt down a cat instead of preventing war.

He didn’t know why Tsunade wouldn’t send him to Iwagakure. He was sure he could persuade Kurotsuchi to change her mind. It was his strength to make bonds and help people overcome their fears. He knew she was in a dark place. Grieving her grandfather.

Concluding it was better to ask Granny Tsunade before he stormed into Iwa himself he turned to her desk, but a harsh knock on the door stopped him.

Kiba came into the room with a worried face. His dog following him.

“We got word from Kumo. The rebel pockets are hired by Iwa.”

Tsunade slammed a fist on her desk. “DAMN! Kiba gather Neji and Tenten. I need to send them on a mission.”

“Should I also look out for Sakura and Ino, Lady Tsunade?”

Naruto saw that the Hokage shook her head.

“I need them inside the village. I can’t send all of you away.” Tsunade put a hand on her forehead. “Let’s hope we can prevent the world from another war.”

* * *

Neji just wanted to leave the Hyuuga compound and head to the training grounds as Tenten hurried to him.

“Neji!”

He felt a warm feeling in his chest at the sight of his girlfriend. They hadn’t seen each other the last three weeks. He was busy with his clans’ demands and she was on a mission. After Hanabi had announced her plans for the future uproar had risen. They wanted to suppress her. Their threat to leave the clan still lingered through the air.

“Do you want to join me with training, Tenten?” he asked.

“Lady Tsunade wants to see us. We don’t have time for training.”

He had heard about the various things happening around the Land of Fire and was on high alert. But with all his own duties he hadn’t the span of attention to worry about Konohagakure and politics.

“And since you came here it’s urgent,” he noted.

“I know that Naruto, Kakashi and Shikamaru will leave the village for missions outside. Kiba had searched for me.”

Neji wasn’t a person to trust his gut instinct. He made logic assumptions. But this time he felt some discomfort rising inside of him.

“Let’s see where we will be sent.”

* * *

  
Sakura sat outside the hospital to catch some breath. Her shift was over in an hour and she hadn’t taken a break since six in the morning. Working became harder. Concentrating on saving the lives of her comrades even more. She was exhausted.

She didn’t know the last time she had enjoyed work. After her breakdown two months ago she had seen the changes. Once she thought the art of healing was the right choice. She could make a difference, save people, her loved ones.

Then war happened.

Her future had been crushed. She didn’t need to close her eyes to see the images that haunted her at night. Every time she treated a patient she saw one of her friends. And she wasn’t able to distinguish if she was in Konoha or on the battlefield.

_Shino was the first one. She infused her chakra into his body, long after he had taken his last breath. Hinata cried at his other side, while Kiba tried to protect them. The moment his bugs left his body, Sakura knew she had lost this fight. She couldn’t help him anymore. He was dead._  
_With tears in her eyes she had to announce his death._

_A day later, without any sleep in between, she had to witness Hinata getting pierced with several wooden spears from behind, because she tried to rescue Naruto. Naruto begged her to help Hinata, but Sakura felt no pulse. It was too late. She took her best friend into a tight embrace, crying with him over another lost comrade. The smell of blood imprinted into her mind._

_And the war kept on giving._

_She had rested for at least two hours before she was called on the battlefield again. Her eyes were heavy and her limbs felt like she walked through water. She knew her chakra was low and she shouldn’t fight, but she needed to. She could not be on stand-by. Sakura was a warrior. If Naruto and Sasuke fought she would follow them._

_Rock Lee jumped in between and took a death blow from one of their enemies. They ripped his heart out in front of her. If Neji and Tenten hadn’t interfered she would’ve been next. She wailed over his dead body until Kankuro needed her help for Shikamaru and Chouji._ _At least those two weren’t dead. Only scarred for a lifetime. She left them alone the moment Temari started to cry on Shikamaru’s bed._

_She shortly thought about Ino. She hadn’t seen her for days. Was she alright?_

_Nothing prepared her for the day after this._

_Sai was crushed by a giant boulder because the ten tails went on a rampage. She couldn’t even say goodbye to him._

_Her heart almost stopped the second Gaara appeared with Naruto on his sand cloud. She wasn’t ready to lose him. They couldn’t lose him because he was the person that gave hope to every Shinobi and Samurai on the battlefield._

_Hardly after she rescued him she was brought to Sasuke. He was surrounded by Orochimaru and his companions. The red-headed girl with the glasses crying at his side. She put his head on her lap, brushed the strands out of his face. Sakura knew he was dying._

_“I love you, Sakura,” he whispered. “I always loved you.”_

_She hadn’t any tears left when Akamaru arrived._

She shouldn’t be alive. She didn’t value life any longer. It was sheer luck she survived and she wasn’t able to live with this guilt.

Sakura looked at the slowly fading light of the day, clouds covered the sky. The darkness was also in her heart. She headed back to work.

* * *

  
Tenten stroked Neji's hair while he was asleep on her chest. He had asked if he could stay at her place and she couldn't deny his wish.

Their relationship has shifted so fast. One moment she wasn't sure if this really was happening. Years of pinning and longing for him had come to an end.

He had kissed her the first time around the end of the year. Both had visited the graves of Lee and Hinata. Neji insisted on bringing her home. Seconds before they parted he shortly brushed his lips over hers. The snow started to fall as he got back to his home.

And then it repeated on various occasions. Their training sessions sometimes just were an excuse to kiss each other for hours. Neji never skipped training, he never would but his lips were hungry for hers.

Tenten wasn't a girl like Ino or Sakura. She kept their relationship a secret. She didn't gush about boys. She enjoyed the warm feeling of being loved by the boy - now a man - she had admired so long.

It warmed her heart and soul knowing that she was on his side. Helping him to build a future for himself and his clan. She would fight with him, if she had to, because Neji would do the same for her.

He moved in his sleep and mumbled words that only he knew. Her lips kissed his Manji on his forehead. He was safe with her. And would always be.

* * *

  
Akamaru didn't want to go out and so Kiba decided to leave on his own. Nighttime in Konoha was different. The whole village was full with guards either Shinobi or Anbu, keeping an eye on strange behaviour inside and outside.

He also had to do this in between his normal missions but since he was - like his friends a highly skilled Shinobi - he did the more dangerous work. He had to think about a lot of things lately.

Ino's kiss was still imprinted on his cheek. He could feel her gentle lips touching his skin. He put a finger on the spot. Kiba hadn't expected this. Hadn't expected such a reaction from her after all that happened the day before.

His feet were scuffling on the way and he gave no special attention to his surroundings.

Sakura’s words were following him.

_I’m sure Ino will see how important you’re for her_

Was the kiss a start? Did Ino have feelings for him? He dared not to think of the impossible. Kiba decided to hope.

As he passed the river he saw someone familiar sitting on a jetty. The blond hair was unmistakable.

“Hey, Naruto. Couldn’t sleep?”

Kiba saw his friend wiping his face. He felt guilty to disturb him in such a private moment.

“Sorry, Kiba. Didn’t see you.” Naruto’s voice cracked. “But you couldn’t sleep either, or?”

He shook his head. “I don’t like what’s happening. Also that I need to stay behind, while everyone else heads outside the village. I want to do something.”

“I hope we don’t need to face war again.” Naruto stood up. “I lost so many friends and I’m not ready to lose more. I thought fighting together would make strong bonds. That we’re at the same side. But Iwa…”

“This time we know our enemy,” Kiba responded. “We know their weakness and can act accordingly.”

“How can you say things like this, dattebayo!” Naruto grabbed Kiba’s collar. “There’s no need for war.”

“You can’t pretend war because you wish for it. Don’t you think this also troubles me? Do you think I don’t see how everyone is broken? Every time Shikamaru can leave this village to stay in Suna, he looks relieved. Ino is a total emotional wreck. And let’s not talk about Sakura.”

Naruto’s face lost all his colour. “It’s all my fault.”

Kiba grabbed his shoulder.

“No, it isn’t. It was sheer luck we survived.” Naruto didn’t look like this made him feel better. “How about we grab something to eat a Ichiraku?”

* * *

Her tessen was heavy these days. Normally she has no problems lifting her weapon. She had to smile as a memory came back to her. One day Shikamaru had asked if he should carry the fan for her. Temari had warned him in advance that it was heavy. He thought he was prepared. Minutes later she had to rescue him from being buried underneath.

She snorted shortly. Sometimes he was an idiot.

She would head out for her mission early in the morning and hopefully meet Shikamaru in the Land of Rivers and if not the Hokage had sent one of his friends. Temari hated to work with dumb, weak Chunin or Jounin. And diplomatic missions were a delicate matter.

At least she knew the leader of Kawa no Kuni. That made negotiations easier.

She closed her tessen and put it back on her back.

It was time to go to sleep.  
  


* * *

Shikamaru had smoked too much since he woke up. His throat felt sore. His lungs burned. He should’ve listened to Temari and quit this habit. The problem was the only other thing that calmed him down was her presence. It wasn’t the sex - even though he loved this part of their relationship a lot - but touching her, kissing her and sleeping next to her made him feel safe.

He thought about his mission and hoped it wasn’t too late to take action. All was rushed. His thoughts were buzzing in his head. Therefore he lit another cigarette. The nicotine gave him small moments of relief for the price of his health. He coughed.

“You should really quit smoking. You sound like Asuma,” Kakashi said as he appeared in front of him.

He rolled his eyes but took another drag. “Good morning, Kakashi.”

“I’m not sure, but why was I the first one to arrive after you?”

“Naruto forgot something at home, so he will come back soon.”

“You just beat us with a second,” Tenten said and joined them. Her hand was linked with Neji’s.

Shikamaru was hardly surprised. Ino had filled him with various rumors and suggestions, or as he called it: gossip. Neji threw him a short, knowing look. He nodded in response.

It was easy to work with Neji. He trusted Shikamaru’s assessment. He was a leader himself, but could work in any given situation. With more Shinobi like Neji, Konoha was safe.  
Naruto also came back to the gate. That meant Shikamaru could talk through their next steps. He knew that Tsunade expected this. They may not head to the same villages, but she trusted his expertise to make them succeed.

"So, let's see. You two are off to Kiri,” he pointed to Neji and Tenten. “Kakashi is in Ame and Naruto covers Ishi and Kusa. I'll go to the Land of Rivers, and also head to Nami no Kuni after that."

Shikamaru saw how all of his comrades nodded in agreement.

“Keep in mind that these are diplomatic missions. We need to prevent the outbreak of another war. Iwagakure has started to threaten Konoha, Suna and Kumo. Discretion is the key.”

“I trust Naruto to do his job, but why is he sent alone? Shouldn’t someone accompany him?” Tenten asked. “And what about Kakashi-sensei?”

“We don’t have enough Shinobi,” Neji answered her question. “Some of us need to protect Konoha in cases of emergency.”

“And Ame still has closed its borders for outsiders," Shikamaru added. "So it's better to send only one Shinobi

"I don't like this," Tenten murmured.

"Neither of us does," Kakashi said. "But this is our only chance. Let's do our best."

Shikamaru later would think a lot about these words. Kakashi was an outstanding Shinobi but nothing could have protected him from being captured and torture in the Hidden Rain. It would be months until they would see him again.

If only he knew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter we will be in the Land of Rivers. Be prepared. :) 
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	7. This Fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Franz Ferdinand - "This Fire"

She knew the Land of Rivers like the back of her hand.

In her childhood and youth she was sent here so often because of her father's political interventions. She was his only daughter and he had thought about marrying her to the son of Kawa no Kuni's leader.

Temari didn't obey his orders back then. She remembered clearly the day she had punched the boy straight in the face, when she was thirteen and he wanted to touch her. After this her father abandoned the idea of marriage from his mind and never talked about it again.

She chuckled as she was walking with Shikamaru through Tanigakure.

“What's so funny?” he asked and arched an eyebrow.

“Just thought about old times,” she answered and chuckled again, hiding it behind her hand.

He shook his head and turned it back to the street.

He had changed and in moments like these she didn't like it. The new Shikamaru was more focused on the tasks before him. He hadn't complained a single day. He didn't even greet her properly. Just a chaste kiss on the lips. He had refused every attempt of her to engage him into more.

She felt the distance between them. He closed her out of his feelings and thoughts. Temari had to admit it hurt her.

Shikamaru normally was easy to read. At least for her. He had opened up for Temari. Showed her his darkest thoughts and fears. She had held him so many times at night, while the nightmares made him scream. Temari hated to see him so hurt.

Since she couldn’t do anything for now, she shrugged her shoulders and followed him silently.  
She would talk to him later and he better was sorry.

Temari was quiet as they finally found an accommodation.

He had searched for a nice place with a hot spring because she deserved it after this journey. Shikamaru knew he had treated her badly and wanted to make it up to her. He was not good with those things. Sure, they knew each other for a long, long time, but his girlfriend Temari and the ambassador Temari were two sides of a coin.

He put his bag on the bed and got rid of his vest. Their long journey was tiring.

Temari walked to the balcony and opened the door.

A wind breeze caught her dress and hair. He heard her sigh in relief. The Land of Rivers wasn't hot like Suna. He knew that the wind was her element.

She could be like a gentle breeze in the mornings, dancing like a thunderstorm and destroying like a hurricane. Therefore he loved her. She was unpredictable, wild, whitty, his woman.

He didn't want to tame her. Just swirl around like a cloud in storms. They belonged together. He knew this for a longer time, when he wanted to admit.

The urge to touch her was unbearable. So he took the steps in her direction. Shikamaru put his head on her shoulder and hugged her from behind.

"I'm sorry. I'm an idiot," he mumbled into her hair. "I wanted you to be safe and sound. The times are unstable."

She pinched his arm. "At least you agree that you behaved like a dork."

Her grin was setting the tone in her voice.

"Are you hungry?"

Instead of answering she turned around and kissed him soundly. Her hands were quick to travel under his shirt.

"Not for food."

* * *

As usual Shikamaru had passed out after sex. She snorted as she got out of the bed, combing her hair with her fingers. Her stomach rumbled, but she didn't want to eat alone.

She gathered her Yukata and dressed. Too lazy to tie her hair, she untangled her streaks with her hand. With a last glance on Shikamaru and into the mirror, she grabbed her bag and headed out. Tea and sweet dumplings sounded like the right thing for now.

She took her time to admire the changes in the village. She wasn't in Tanigakure for four years. All the merchants wanted her to buy their goods, but she walked to a teahouse she had visited the last time.

She ordered green tea and some sweet dumplings, and sat on a bench that wasn't occupied. It was nice to watch the villagers. They were careless and happy because of her work. She could help to build permanent peace, and with the help of her brothers, her friends and Shikamaru she would achieve it.

Temari was halfway done with her tea as a familiar face came into her view. She choked.

"Temari? Is that you?"

She swallowed the tea. "Hello Yaten. Nice meeting you."

Yaten smiled.

"I hope this time, you won't punch me. It still hurts."

Nervously she laughed. "Oh, ehm...you're safe."

She noticed that he had grown to be a good looking man, with a smile any woman would fall for instantly. Temari knew she blushed herself and called herself an idiot. He sat on the bench across her.

Since she didn’t want to be rude, she accepted his company. She needed to meet him anyway. He ordered himself some tea and dango, then folded his hands under his chin, leaning closer to her.

“It must be years since I last saw you. How’s Suna? And your brothers?”

“Same old, same old,” she answered and sipped her tea. “It’s getting better since Gaara is Kazekage. Kankuro and I helped him a lot, but he had grown into a fine man.”

He nodded and smiled.“That sounds good.”

The waitress brought his serving and he immediately grabbed one dango.

“I’ve heard about all the losses and sacrifices in war. But I’m sure the bond between Suna and Konoha helped to do wonders for both countries.”

“Sure,” she answered, fiddling the mug in her hand. “We’re about to build the Shinobi Alliance. After we worked together in war, it seems like a good idea.”

“Do you want Kawa no Kuni to join, too?”

Temari bit on her lip. She didn’t want to spill the beans here in public.

“I think we should talk in private about those things.”

He agreed. "Are you traveling through, or are you staying?"

"I've a mission," she answered. She wanted to point at her head protector, but realized she didn't wear it.

"Oh, that sounds much more interesting." He leaned over to her. "Do you have time in the evening?"

"Actually -," she started but was interrupted by another voice.

"Here you are, Temari."

It was Shikamaru in his full shinobi gear. A disturbed look on his face. He wore his eye patch. Temari saw her bite mark on his neck peeking from underneath his shirt. He handed her the Suna headband.

"Thanks, Shikamaru," she said after she put it around her head.

"Oh, you're not alone, Princess."

Temari saw that Shikamaru looked with a frown in his direction.

"Nara Shikamaru. I'm the Hokage's advisor," he said.

"Watashi Yaten. I'm the leader of this country."

Shikamaru didn’t like the way this guy looked at Temari. He looked like she was prey, and her blushed face made him angry. He was aware that ripping this guy's head off wouldn’t help, but he really wanted to punch or kick him, because of his self-conscious smile and attitude.

Normally he wouldn’t mind, but it was Temari and he felt jealous.

It had occurred to him that Temari knew the leader of the Land of Rivers, but to see them chat familiar with each other and her red cheeks, showed him there was more backstory to this.

He had to prioritize his mission. Talking with the head of Kawa no Kuni to see if Iwa had approached them to join into a coup against Konoha and Suna. So for first he swallowed his pride and placed himself beside Temari.

“Yaten and I were talking about the Shinobi Alliance", Temari filled him in.

He felt her hand on his knee.

"We need strong bonds between all villages and countries. The peace is unstable as long as we're not gathered within the Shinobi Alliance."

Yaten nodded and smiled.

"You're a clever boy," he said. "But I've to go." He put some bills on the table. "It's my treat today. I'll send one of servants in the evening and we can talk about the purpose of your mission."

The leader of Kawa no Kuni winked at Temari and left.

* * *

  
She suggested walking through Tanigakure before they would go back to their accommodation and showed Shikamaru various spots she knew. He was silent and followed her with shuffling feet. His shoulders were slumped. At least he didn’t smoke.

Shikamaru seemed moody again and she was fed up with this behaviour. She didn’t want to make a scene in the middle of the street, so she just tried to ignore him brooding and continued to admire the beauty around her. Since she didn’t know how long they needed to stay in Kawa no Kuni, because Yaten could be really stubborn, she bought some fruit.

The Land of Rivers was more fruitful than the Land of Wind. Most vegetables and fruits were exported from here into her home. She was overwhelmed. All the smells and colours were so nice.

“What’s your favourite fruit, Shikamaru?” she asked and tried to involve him in a conversation.

“I don’t have a favourite fruit.” He shrugged and turned away.

She rolled her eyes. He always said she was a pain in the ass. Did he ever consider he was the problem?

Temari grabbed his vest. “You spoiled Konoha brats,” she said. “You never had to choose what you eat, because the Land of Fire can grow and produce their own goods, while we in Suna hoped for a scorpion to get caught in our traps.”

She heard a sigh escape his mouth.

“I like apples. But the sweet ones.”

“Thanks for cooperating, crybaby.”

Temari bought some apples and announced they could head back to the inn. He better had a good excuse for the cause of his again strange behaviour towards her. She already started to hate this mission.

* * *

  
He knew Temari would start yelling at him as soon they were in their room and she delivered. She put the bags with their groceries on the table of their apartment before she exploded.

“Would you mind telling me, what got into you, Shikamaru?” she asked with a growl in her voice. “I thought everything was fine until you found me sitting with Yaten at the tea house. So give me a reason why you behave like this.”

She lowered her eyebrows threateningly and clenched her jaw. Her arms were crossed and one of her fingers repeatedly tipped on her forearm. He ran a hand through his hair.

“It’s nothing. I’m just exhausted.”

“DON’T YOU TELL ME IT’S NOTHING!” she yelled. “I know you!”

She came near him, pointing with a finger at his chest.

“Calm down, Temari,” he said and put out his hands, palms facing her.

“I will only calm down when you speak with me. This whole relationship between us can’t work if you lie to me. So please, give me an explanation.”

He rubbed his neck with one hand. Shikamaru didn’t want to tell her he was jealous. She would laugh and that was the last thing he needed now.

“How long do you know Yaten? You two seemed familiar with each other.”

Her eyes widened and she put a hand on her hip.

“We cooperate for years with the Land of Rivers. Trading goods, mostly foodstuff, is what kept Suna alive. So, yes, I have known Yaten for a long time. We need this cooperation so my people won’t suffer.”

“And it’s normal for you two flirting with each other?” He bit his tongue, but it was too late.

Her mouth opened and she gasped. “Are you serious? You behave like a jerk because it scratched your ego that I'm on good terms with Kawa no Kuni’s leader? That’s this fuss about?” She snorted. “Wow, you’re unbelievable.”

“It’s not about my ego,” he threw back to her. “I agreed to this mission because I wanted to help prevent a war. Because Konoha and Suna are close allies. And you decided to hide the fact that the leader of this country loves to flirt and you know him really well.”

“Man up,” she said annoyed, raised her chin and now put both hands on her hips. “I’m not your property. I had a life before we met each other. If you can’t handle other men flirting with me, you should consider your life choices.”

He groaned and threw his hands in the air. “THAT IS NOT THE PROBLEM!”

She flinched as he raised his voice.

“Then tell me, Nara. If you’re not jealous, why are you acting like this? Enlighten me with your genius.”

Shikamaru grabbed her waist and pulled her closer, kissing her hard. She threw her arms around his neck. 

_Couldn’t she understand how she made him unreasonable? That she was the one why he felt so vulnerable? She could crush his heart in seconds with just a look._

He didn’t let go of her. His hands locked on her hips, wanting to feel her pressed to his body. He breathed her in and felt complete.

Shikamaru wanted to take her to bed, when a knock on the door broke them part.

Temari gulped, pushed him brashly away and headed to the door. He saw how a man handed her a scroll.

His ears were buzzing. The blood rushed in his head. So he didn’t understand what was happening.

“We’ve an invitation for dinner,” Temari announced. “We need to prepare in advance.”

Shikamaru nodded and couldn’t look her in the eye. They had a mission after all and their fighting had to be postponed. Maybe later they would talk.

* * *

  
The dining hall was huge. At least fifty people could sit at the table. Shikamaru was sitting across her, Yaten sat at the head of the table.

They had finished the third course of dinner and waited for the dessert. Until now she had exchanged pleasantries with Yaten. He also had asked Shikamaru about Konoha and the Land of Fire.

She knew that he acted professional in front of Yaten because of their mission. But his body language told her that he still was angry with her. He barely looked into her direction. Like she was just a colleague and not the woman with whom she shared a bed.

Temari never had a real fight with him. Their normal communication mostly consisted of playful banter. He was reasonable and calm. He sighed, but didn't push over the boundaries of people. She was hot-headed. She was the one yelling and screaming. She didn't hold back and regretted her reactions later.

Therefore she hadn't eaten much. Her stomach felt like a knot. She wanted to talk with Shikamaru. Tell him she was sorry or at least work things out between them. It shouldn't be this complicated.

The dessert was placed in front of them. It was ice-cream with lots and lots of fruit. She would have loved to dig into it, but as she glanced over to Shikamaru her appetite left.

"I still remember this is your favourite, Temari," said Yaten and put a spoon into his dessert. "Or am I wrong?"

She turned her head to Yaten and smiled. "You remember correctly. I'm just not this hungry."

"As long as you're here, you can drop by any time. Since we're old friends."

She heard that Shikamaru made a small sound. Temari thought it was time to talk about the important topics. Sooner or later Shikamaru would explode. They already have wasted two hours.

"You're right. We're allies since my father was Kazekage," she started. "And to strenghten our bonds we should talk about the contracts for the next season."

"Also Konoha has to make a proposal," Shikamaru added.

Temari thought they had agreed on a different approach and gave him a questioning look. She wasn't prepared for such a quick change of plans.

"I knew you had a purpose visiting the Land of Rivers. Two shinobi from different Hidden Villages, who cooperate for years? That can't be a coincidence," Yaten said and bit into a strawberry. "Since Iwa approached us a week ago I waited for a reaction."

Temari was thankful she had full control over her face, so Yaten didn't see her surprise. She saw Shikamaru frown. So he also didn't know about Iwa's intervention.

"We're forming the Shinobi Alliance," Temari said. "Therefore we want to gather all nations together in a peaceful atmosphere in Tetsu no Kuni."

"And Kawi no Kuni should join this alliance," Shikamaru added.

Yaten grinned. Temari wasn't sure what was on his mind.

“I want to be honest with you, Temari,” he continued. “I was tempted to agree to Iwa's offer. I really was. But I couldn’t.”

He pushed his chair from the table and stood up.

“I don’t think we should discuss this now. You just arrived today. So let’s postpone any decision till tomorrow.”

Temari knew this would happen. Yaten wasn’t an idiot. He would leave them stew in their own juices until he got what he wanted. She hoped Shikamaru really had some ace up his sleeve or they would stay until the end of time in Tanigakure.

Shikamaru also raised from his chair and bowed slightly.

“I agree. These matters need to be discussed in detail. I only can emphasize that Lady Tsunade offers a lot of solutions for a closer bond between our countries.”

“I take you at your word, Nara Shikamaru.” Yaten took her hand into his and placed a kiss on her cheek. “I wish you a good night.”

He left the room. Temari didn’t need to look into Shikamaru’s eyes to know he wasn’t fond of that kiss.

She swallowed hard,wondering if she needed another room this night. They would continue their fight and she didn’t want to.

* * *

He walked ahead of Temari, absolutely sure he couldn’t keep his calm. Yaten had successfully riled him up. The chaste kiss was a warning. He was the leader of this nation and would get what he wanted.

Obviously he wanted to have Temari.

She could’ve told him sooner her father once considered to marry her to him. Such information was vital for him; to get the whole picture.

He had looked up every information he could get about the Land of Rivers and knew about all the ominous stories with Yaten and women. Shikamaru didn’t know if Temari gave a damn about that gossip, but he had married three girls and all of them died, within the first year of their marriage. His contacts in Anbu had told him about various rumors about the strange circumstances of their deaths.

The first girl, at the tender age of thirteen, had died because of unknown internal bleedings; suggesting it was a backstreet abortion. Six months later the next unlucky girl, this time she was three years older, had drowned in one of the rivers; but it was odd she had marks of a strangulation on her neck. The last wife had lived the longest at Yaten’s side. Almost one year passed until the third woman disappeared. She never had been found.

He closed and opened his fists in anger and confusion. Shikamaru wanted to punch something. And it wasn’t Temari’s fault Yaten flirted with her. He knew this. However, he couldn’t get rid of that jealousy.

Until now he had thought it was a given Temari belonged to him. She cared for him and he cared even more for her. He was head over heels in love with her, but what if she didn’t feel the same way about him? What if Temari decided to end their relationship which was still undefined? Dragging each other to bed the second they met each other wasn’t a basis for something.

He felt safe around her. She was home. Not Konoha, the Nara forest, his friends. The answer was Temari. To all that he wanted and needed.

“Shikamaru,” she said behind him. He had stopped for a second. They had reached their accommodation.

“Not here, Temari. Not now. Let’s get in our room.”

He needed to show her that she belonged to him. Shikamaru didn’t want to rule over her, but she needed to know.

* * *

  
The second they entered the room he pushed her with force against the next wall and claimed her lips. He wasn't gentle but entered her mouth with his tongue, battling for dominance. His body pressed her much deeper into the wall, while his hand slid inside her Yukata to grab her breast. He twisted her nipple and she moaned because of the sharp pain.

"Shikamaru,” she said, trying to concentrate, while his hands travel further south her body. She closed her eyes, while he bit down her neck. “What the hell are you doing?”

“Be quiet for once, woman,” he mumbled and continued his ministrations with his lips on her neck and breasts. Her skin burned where his fingers touched her and a lot of sounds escaped her throat.

It was unusual for him to be this dominant. He often initiated sex because he had this urge to touch her, get lost in her and worship her body, but he didn’t mind if she took charge and led the way. After all, he was lazy. But he showed her a more demanding and also - and she felt embarrassed to admit it - such a sexy side, that she only could give in to his touch. It felt too good.

His fingers found her most sensitive spot between her legs and started a rhythm that would send her over the edge soon. She stopped thinking and wanted to touch him, feel him inside her. Her heart pounded harder, and her breathing became faster. She almost reached her climax, but then he stopped.

“Please,” she begged and tried to grab his hand. She couldn’t move. Her eyes flung open.

He had trapped her in his shadows. She could see his Kage–Kubishibari no Jutsu. The shadow hands pinning her arms at her side, while her feet were stuck inside Shikamaru’s shadow.

“You’re mine,” he groaned into her ear. “Do you understand that, Temari?”

She didn’t know what to say as he again started to kiss her hard. Their teeth clashing together. He grabbed her breast again and pinched her now puffy nipple.

“Yes,” she whispered as he interrupted their kiss.

He threw her over his shoulder and carried her to bed.

* * *

  
Shikamaru saw Temari grinning from one ear to the other. His back was burning from the scratches she had caused.

He hadn’t been gentle as he had penetrated her. He should feel ashamed for his behaviour but it had felt so good to hear her moans of pleasure, her hips begging him for more.

He had covered her whole body with bite marks. Temari’s hair was ruffled. The first time he had fucked her, he had just bowed her over the bed and slid inside her with one hard thrust, that made her moan so sweetly he almost lost it.

As she already was totally dishevelled he needed more. He wanted to show her that she belonged to him; that it was him who gave her all this pleasure, like no other man ever could. She wasn’t able to protest, because she came so hard, she trembled. He shortly had adjusted her position before he again pushed inside her this time facing her, enjoying her lust with every thrust.

He didn’t know how much time had passed or how often she reached her climax. 

All in all he was satisfied with how Temari looked at this moment. Her eyes were squinted, her skin was red and sweaty, and that smile plastered on her face made him melt.

He caressed her hip bone and wanted to put a hand between her legs, but she stopped him.

“Shikamaru, please. I’m done. I’m sore and sure the next time I pass out.”

Her voice was hoarse. He chuckled.

“You begged for more minutes ago.”

“I hate you,” she answered and sighed. “I just wanted to take a bath, but I can’t move a muscle.”

“I can help you with that,” he said and placed kisses on her stomach. “Though I like how you look right now.”

“I’ll kill you, Nara. I swear by all that’s holy, if you try something you won’t survive.”

Shikamaru didn’t want to test if she would make her threat true, so he kissed her temple and cupped her cheek.

“I love you, Temari. I really do. And I’m not sorry for giving you a good ride.”

Her face blushed deeply. Shikamaru didn’t know how she could be so open about sex and at the same time be this shy. She opened her eyes and looked at him.

“You never have said that before. That you love me.” Her voice sounded curious.

“How can I not love you?” he asked.

“Because I’m a troublesome woman,” she said and grinned. “Didn’t you say you want an easy life?”

“Everything is easy with you, Tem.”

She pulled him closer to kiss him properly.

“I also love you, Shikamaru.”

* * *

  
Shikamaru had gently put her inside a hot bath and massaged her afterwards, while he dabbed her skin dry. In between he had kissed her softly and even helped her to do her hair. Temari felt much better now.

Finally she understood why he had acted this way. He had been worried to lose her because he loved her. Temari didn’t want to laugh about this. Shikamaru had lost his sensei and his father, more of his friends. The whole burden of Konoha laid on his shoulders. So it was only natural for him to be scared. He had lost so many important people in his life. But she would not leave his side.

She didn’t think words were needed to express her feelings for him and how wrong she was. Shikamaru smothered her entire body with small touches of his lips as they laid in the bed again. She felt it fluttering in her stomach.

Temari grabbed his hair and pulled his face to hers. She leaned to kiss him on the lips. He smiled.

“You don’t have to fear anything, Shikamaru,” she breathed. “I’ll stay at your side no matter what happens.”

He sighed. “You kill me, Tem. The moment you look at me I stop thinking. I can’t tell you how much you mean to me.”

“You showed me,” she said cheekily, what made him chuckle. “But it’s the same for me. I know we don’t talk about the war, but I was sure I would die the second I saw you injured on that camp bed.”

He catched the tear that had lurked out of her eye. She buried her head on his chest. His strong arms held her tight. She was safe. They had each other and nothing else mattered.

* * *

It was the middle of the night he woke up sweating and with such a headache he was about to throw up. He slumped out of the bed, barely able to move and almost crouched to the bathroom. In front of the toilet he let himself fall to the ground.

The pressure of vomiting made the headache even worse. The pain behind his right eye made him unable to see with his other eye. He saw colours dancing. He wanted to hit his head on the wall because it was unbearable.

Shikamaru knew this kind of pain. He had endured this the first month after his injury. Sakura said it was a reaction from his destroyed nerves. His brain tried to communicate with his eye. Since it didn’t get a proper reaction it repeated the last information over and over again.

He heard the blood rushing in his head, could feel every muscle contracting and the nerves tingling like ants at the top of his head. Shikamaru didn’t want to wake Temari but he couldn’t suppress the screams that came out of his throat. He hadn’t felt this miserable for months.

The last time the pain came back, he was working at the Hokage tower. All of the sudden he had dropped the scroll in his hands. He was lucky Shizune was present and could help him. She had used her chakra to lower the pain. Then she took him to the hospital and prescribed him some meds he should take if the pain reached the same level again.

But this time it was worse.

He had pills he could take for small pain attacks. The morphine was for pain like this. He needed to find the syringe in his bag. The bag that was in the bedroom. He tried to stand up and felt the trembling in his whole body.

“Shikamaru?”

Temari was suddenly standing in the bathroom. He was so grateful for her presence. She knelt beside him, gently touching his shoulder.

“What is it? How can I help?”

“Morphine,” he growled as the pain increased again. “In my bag.”

She left him without more fuss and came back a second later. He pressed his fingers into his skull. It helped him to concentrate.

“Where in your bag, Shika?”

“A syringe. Leather case.”

He closed his eyes and prayed he wouldn’t pass out. The sounds of her rummaging through his things made him sick again. He turned his head to throw up again and didn’t care that Temari was with him. She could handle it. She had seen and smelled worse.

He felt her touch his arm and disinfect it with a cloth. The needle pierced his skin.

Now he had to wait for the morphine to do its magic.

Temari helped Shikamaru to get back into the bed. She was angry and worried. Angry because he didn’t tell her he still had pain attacks. Worried because it came out of the sudden.

He clinged to her shirt and muffled his screams with the pillow beneath his head. She didn’t dare to touch him. His whole body was tense. She knew that even the strongest medicine needed time to operate.

He breathed hard and mumbled some words. It took her time to realise that he was speaking with her.

“Sorry, Tem,” he said with a husky voice.

“Psst, don’t speak. No need to be sorry.”

She put her other hand on his, brushing her thumb over his white knuckles.

“Should’ve told you.”

“Yes, you should,” she whispered. “But don’t think about that now. Think about something nice.”

“Can’t. Hurts.”

“I’m sure the morphine works any minute.”

As on cue he exhaled deeply. All the tension in his body subsided and his breath came out easy. His hand relaxed.

He was asleep and Temari thanked all gods. She rolled him on the back so he had a more comfortable position to sleep. She pressed a kiss on his forehead.

“What should I do with you, Shika?”

That night she watched over his sleep and hoped he the pain wouldn't come back at night. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I'm a ShikaTema fangirl by heart. And this chapter turned out completely different. 
> 
> I planned to give them a spotlight with this chapter (and don't worry, ALL side-ships get one), but the smut wasn't planned and not Shika's painful headache.
> 
> But it's one of my favourite's so far. :)


	8. Wrong Side of Heaven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Five Finger Death Punch- "Wrong Side of Heaven"
> 
> CW: Mention of Wounds / Blood

He couldn’t sleep.

Being back in Konoha felt so alien to him. Like he was a stranger and didn’t grow up surrounded by trees. Kumogakure had become a second home to him. Mostly because he enjoyed Karui’s company.

He had waited for her return to Kumo. Chouji knew it was unreasonable to be worried about her. She was a grown up woman and a kunoichi that had trained under Killer Bee. People should be scared of her, not the other way around.

Before his departure he had visited her and her mother at home, inviting her for dinner. She had agreed happily. Also she seemed to be sad he had to leave, but Karui understood. They needed to react to Iwagakure’s threat.

She had said goodbye to him at their gates and Chouji knew she stared after him until he disappeared on the horizon.

He rolled back on his back and sighed.

He hadn’t seen it coming. It just hit him this very second he cared for Karui not just like a friend. He wanted to hold her hand and kiss her.

He had some crushes during his life. One time it was Ayame, the daughter of the owner of Ichiraku’s Ramen. But back then it was he was so in love with their food and not the woman itself.

Chouji thought about Shikamaru and Temari. He had watched them from afar. How they behaved around each other. His friend was so happy around her; he wanted the same.

He threw the blankets away.

A walk around the village would make him feel better. Normally he would eat something but his appetite left him with the second he had turned away from Karui.

* * *

The fog made it really hard to see with normal eyes. So Tenten trusted Neji and his Byakugan to lead the way.

It was a week after their arrival the Mizukage had agreed on a meeting. She wasn’t in the village because she had travelled to Nami no Kuni. So they used the time they had to ask around the village and investigate if they were hiding something.

It was a nice change for the better to have Neji on her own. She could sleep next to him, his arm around her waist and his nose buried in her hair. Tenten loved to watch him sleep. Then he smiled all the time.

They kept their relationship a secret inside the Hyuuga clan and Neji tried never to be alone with her. Hiding something from people with their visual prowess was a hard task. She wanted to hug him, kiss him on the cheek or just look into Neji’s direction without being caught. Therefore the fog was a great excuse for her to hold his hand this very moment; and Neji didn’t mind kissing her from time to time.

Tenten didn’t want to leave so soon. The delay matched with her plans to enjoy her relationship for once. Every additional day was an achievement.

Neji stopped in his tracks and let go of her hand.

“We’ve reached the Mizukage residence,” he said and leaned down to kiss her. “We need to act professional now.”

Tenten pouted. She didn’t want to be professional. She just wanted another kiss.

Neji seemed to read her mind and kissed her again, taking his time to make a lasting impression. She grinned as they entered the building.

* * *

Naruto was devastated. He had tried everything in his might to persuade Ishigakure to attend the first meeting of the Shinobi Alliance but their leader didn’t listen to him. Whatever Iwa had offered them was better than Granny Tsunade’s proposal.

He had treated himself to eat some ramen and then would head to Kusagakure.

He was the war hero, who had gathered all shinobi together to fight a common enemy. They all had lost their friends and beloved ones. Naruto still couldn’t think about Sasuke being gone for good. He had broken his promise to bring him back to Konoha. His life-time promise was just a sham considering the tears Sakura shed and would shed until the end of her life.

His determination, his ninja way, all his dreams were shattered into pieces.

He looked down at his hands. The hands that held the dead body of Hinata. One second her heart beat, the next second she did her last breath. It was his name she said before death called her. And then her eyes looked up at him. Her beautiful white eyes; now without the spark of life.

Marrying Hinata one day was his goal. He just wasn’t ready. Naruto thought about asking her for a date after war was over. He was so focused on bringing Sasuke back to Konoha; he couldn’t need a distraction. And Hinata was a distraction. She was precious to him. Not the way like his other friends. Even before she stated she loved him during his fight with Pain, Naruto thought differently about Hinata. He knew she was the next to take over the Hyuuga clan. He wanted to impress her father and show him he was worthy to date his daughter. So he pushed her away until the time came.

He regretted this deeply. Hinata died without knowing he had loved her.

The nights were filled with dreams where he rescued her. As he closed his eyes he could see her smile.

He paid for his half-eaten meal and put on his backpack. Kusagakure was waiting for him. He hoped for better results.

* * *

With most of his friends outside the village Kiba took over some of their tasks. He assisted the Hokage with her work the best way he could and ran errands inside Konoha on her behalf.

He was the one who got the hawk with the information about Iwagakure’s plans. Tsunade almost threw her desk outside the window because she was angry. Shizune had to stop her and Kiba just called in some Anbu to calm her down.

A death threat was an insult beyond believe. He still couldn’t fathom why Iwagakure tried to destroy every effort to build peace. It wasn’t about personal grudges. They needed to work together for the greater good.

So he was standing in front of the academy now and watched the kids during their break. He could see Iruka sitting in a corner, reading a book. Kiba sighed.

Shortly before war Shino had told him and Hinata he wanted to become a teacher. That he wanted to show the kids in the academy what it meant to be a ninja. Hinata was so happy for their friend, while Kiba was sad his team would grow further apart. He knew one day they all would lead their own teams or chose another path. But he thought they still would be a team. Went on missions together. If Shino decided to become a teacher that was out of question. But he didn’t show his confusion and sadness back then. As a good friend he congratulated him.

Now he felt bad for having such thoughts.

He hadn’t a path to follow. He didn’t have any dreams that were more than a prank. Kiba never seriously thought he would become Hokage. He just loved to rile up Naruto. Being a shinobi was everything he ever wanted. He didn’t want to be special or achieve some life-time goal.

He didn’t know if this was a good way to live his life. Maybe it was, as he looked at his friends, who all were torn because their future had changed and they couldn’t cope.

He looked away from the carefree children that played hide and seek.   
  
Kiba was awaited back at the Hokage's office and he hated it.

* * *

Another sandstorm - the third within one week - made it impossible to move outside and so Kankuro and Gaara took the opportunity for war preparations.

They had no news from Temari except that Yaten wanted to get a lot of concessions to join the Shinobi Alliance, otherwise he would raise the prices for food exports and make it impossible to cross borders between the Land of Wind and the Land of Fire. Both trusted Shikamaru and her to negotiate the contracts for the better, but it would take more time than expected.

Kankuro needed her input.

She knew which Chunin was capable of leading a squad inside battle formations. She had the names and techniques of each shinobi of Suna stored inside her head. She was the one who made decisions easier.

Gaara looked as frustrated as he felt. His brother couldn’t sleep, because the shadows under his eyes got worse. Being the Kazekage was a tough job. Therefore he tried to help him as much as he could. Some day they would lose Temari to Konoha and his job would become much harder.

Their sister had never let anyone get this close like Shikamaru. She had dated a few guys before him, but it stopped a year after she went to Konoha on a regular basis. Kankuro had never asked Temari about her feelings for the Konoha nin, because he wasn't blind. It wasn't solemnly camaraderie he had rescued Shikamaru in war. He knew if he died his sister would have died on the inside with him.

_He breathed hard and squinted his eyes. It was so hard to differ between friends and foes. His fingers and arms trembled. It was exhausting to manipulate his puppets over a long period of time. He needed rest._

_"Shikamaru!" screamed a familiar voice and he snapped his head to the side._

_He saw Chouji trying to stand up. His left arm was a bloody mess. Kankuro wasn't sure if you could describe this as an arm any longer. And on the ground he saw that dark signature pony-tail. He tried to defend himself with his arms. The enemy grabbed a kunai and stabbed Shikamaru on the right side, in his face._

_Without any thought he started to run. He blocked out the pictures in his mind. He knew that the enemy had hit Shikamaru's eye. The boy screamed because of unbearable pain._

_His fingers moved and Karasu grabbed the enemy, pulled him away from Shikamaru. He trapped the ninja inside Sanshōuo and threw himself on the ground; next to Shikamaru._

_He still screamed and tried to cover his eye. Kankuro tried to calm him down while he looked at his right side, the side of his face that was completely covered in blood. He could see the pieces that belonged to his eye. He got sick as he saw how much damage had been done to his friend._

_He held him close, mumbling words of comfort. As Shikamaru finally passed out he was grateful.  
  
_

* * *

"I can't believe we are her for a week and have accomplished nothing!" Temari walked from one side, to the other in their room and stomped her feet on the ground. "Does he really think we would agree to his ridiculous demands?"

She pointed with a finger on the paper and put her hands up in the air.

Shikamaru watched her from his position on the bed, trying to concentrate on her words, while his head throbbed again. He soon had to take one of the pills or it would get worse.

He didn't know what had triggered the constant pain attacks. Only that they got worse with each day passing since that one night. He closed his eyes and concentrated on his breathing. It helped a bit. What didn't help was Temari's tantrum in front of him.

"Tem," he interrupted her. "I know you're angry and upset. But I can't concentrate now."

He felt the mattress moving and seconds later her elegant fingers opened his ponytail.

"You should tell me, when your pain starts again," she scolded him. "But I hope you don't say this every time to stop me. You know how I love to ramble."

He wanted to chuckle, but immediately a sharp pain stabbed him behind his eye. Instead he groaned and grabbed his head.

"Do you have enough pills left?"

"Sakura's hawk delivered new ones today."

Temari pulled him into another position, so his head was in her lap. Her fingertips started massaging his skull. The pain slowly subsided.

They didn't trust Yaten enough to ask for help in the hospital of Tanigakure. So they had asked for help from Konoha. 

Yaten had delayed their departure for at least a week and it looked like they would need much more time. Shikamaru hated to be stuck, so he told Temari about Yaten's wives.

As he had predicted she got angry and even more after he shared the details he had found out. Temari wasn't as fond of Yaten as he had initially thought. She didn't mind killing him if he started to act up again. Her investigations had led to interesting insights into the politics of the Land of Rivers.

So interesting Shikamaru had asked for reinforcements - or should he say ANBU - from Konoha. 

He drifted into a slumber, while Temari continued to massage his head.

* * *

Neji had taken the lead in the discussion with Terumi Mei and answered all questions regarding Iwagakure. The Mizukage listened closely and her hands were folded in her lap.

He got used to diplomatic talk. All the meetings with the elders of his clan had given him enough confidence to tackle any difficulties regarding the upcoming war.

This time it wasn't too late.

Kurotsuchi wasn't like their last enemy. She was full of sadness and sorrow, anger and hate, so many emotions battled inside her, trying to grasp some kind of understanding what happened to her beloved grandfather. He felt the same pain; all of them.

"It has a nice touch that Tsunade sends the next head of the Hyuuga clan for such important issues."

He wanted to hand the Mizukage a scroll and shortly freezed.

"My cousin is the next head of the clan. I assist her until she's ready," he answered and lowered his head a fraction.

"I apologize for these false assumptions," she said and cleared her throat. "Then tell me Hyuuga Neji, what does Lady Tsunade want?"

"She wants every Hidden Village and every other nation to join the Shinobi Alliance. In around three weeks is the first meeting."

Mei cocked her head. "Did she approach the Tsuchikage?"

"Every attempt of contacting Iwagakure was shut down. Suna also tried to make an appointment but even here they didn't react."

"And so you've sent shinobi from Kumo, I see."

Neji didn't know if she was angry about this. Tsunade had made clear to him he had to be open about everything to persuade Mei into helping them.

"It was a logical choice. Kumogakure is in the same situation. They had to name a new Kage after the war. And Kumo and Iwa were close allies beforehand."

"I'll try to contact Kurotsuchi. And Kirigakure will participate in the Shinobi Alliance," Mei decided and smiled. "You can go back to Konoha tomorrow. Tonight we'll have a feast."

He glanced shortly to Tenten at his side who nodded. Another night in Kiri wasn't their plan either but diplomatic missions needed some sacrifices.

* * *

Karui missed Chouji.

Without him the days in Kumo weren’t so much fun. She had bought some of his favourite sweets to send them to Konoha and still struggled if she stepped over the boundaries of their friendship.

She had to concentrate on the meeting with Darui and all the other higher ups of her village but all she could think about was the Konoha nin and his smile. She must be a total idiot to fall for a ninja from another village. She wasn’t such a lovefool. She needed to get him out of her mind.

“Suna and Konoha are preparing for the worst case at the moment,” Omoi explained. “We have high expectations for the first meeting of the Shinobi Alliance. If we are able to gather all nations in one place maybe Iwagakure will be reasonable and listen to us.”

Darui massaged his forehead with one hand and nodded. They were sitting for hours in this meeting and a break was inevitable. Karui didn’t envy Darui. He hadn’t struggled to take over his spot as Raikage, but it was hard.

“If we combine our forces with Suna and Konoha, is it possible to win a war against Iwagakure?” he asked and looked around in the faces of his confidants.

“Don’t tell me you will change sides before war even started?” Karui burst out angry.

The Raikage raised from his chair and looked her in the eye.

“Why do you think I would do this? We can stay out of this war,” he elaborated and pointed at the map on his desk. “Iwa, Suna and Konoha share borders. Kiri and Kumo don’t need to take sides. That would be the best solution for us.”

“We wouldn’t lose more shinobi,” Samui added. “Half a year isn’t enough time to recover from the after-effects of the last war. Our village is in shambles from the Biju bombs.”

“But we are allies.” Omoi seldom had a strong opinion about things like these. “We can’t leave them alone in this!”

Darui closed the map. “I don’t leave them alone. I just wanted to show you our choices.” He clenched a fist. “I understand why Kurotsuchi behaves like this and I hope she listens to reason.”

“And what do we do now?” Karui asked.

“In three weeks we will meet the others in Tetsu no Kuni,” Darui decided. “Please answer Mifune as soon as possible, Samui.”

* * *

  
It was a logical choice to learn the Mind Destruction Jutsu and all the other secret techniques of the Yamanaka clan to join the Torture and Interrogation Force of Konoha. Her father had been working here and helped Morino Ibiki with his work. Ino just took over the reigns.

At first she had to learn coping with the rough tone inside the hidden chambers. Most of the shinobi working here were men and therefore sometimes behaved like a bunch of apes. Inoichi’s reputation opened her a lot of doors. They respected her status and were very attentive. What bothered Ino were the things she saw inside the heads of the people they held captive. And even more what they did to them afterwards.

Ibiki had no qualms with torturing. He took action and rushed forward. Ino was fascinated how her supervisor handled his job. At their breaks he made dark jokes and laughed a lot. Inside the interrogation rooms he was cold like ice and didn’t flinch when he held a kunai at the throat of their enemies.

She also knew that her father had been like this. Nobody would’ve suggested Yamanaka Inoichi who sold flowers and cared deeply for his wife and his daughter was a brutal shinobi, who could crush the minds of his foes with the flick of his fingers. Ino didn’t know if she was able to make a clear cut.

Today she watched Ibiki interrogate a shinobi from Iwagakure. It was the man they had caught in Kumogakure. One of her clan’s men had already looked inside his mind. Chouji, who was finally back in Konoha, had handed her the reports.

She had hugged him a long time before they even exchanged words. She had missed him so much. They would eat together in the evening. Hopefully Shikamaru would be back soon. She wanted to have her team safe inside Konoha. The signs for war were unmistakable.

“It’s your turn, Yamanaka,” Ibiki instructed her. “We need to implant a new memory inside his head and send him back to Iwagakure.”

“Ibiki-sama, I can’t do that. I only learned the Mind Destruction Jutsu. Implanting new memories in someone’s mind is something completely different.”

“I give the orders here,” he answered. “You do as you’re told. Since you’re an intern, you have to show some progress. It’s already time.”

Ino looked with wide eyes at Ibiki. He couldn’t be serious. He told her the other day, she can do things at her own pace. Why did he suddenly decide to change plans? She wouldn’t back down because that wasn't the way a Yamanaka handled difficult situations.

“What kind of memory should I implant into his mind?”

“The moment he crosses borders at Iwagakure he needs to kill himself.”

She didn’t ask why. It was pointless. Ibiki wanted her to do it. Ino didn’t like it, but obeyed his orders.

She would hate herself forever either way. She was a shinobi and wanted to follow her father’s path. 

Maybe it wasn't the right path for her.

* * *

Temari walked back to her accommodation. She had sent a hawk to Konoha asking for medical help.

Shikamaru had stayed behind. The headache had gotten worse. It was the second day he had to take the morphine to ease the pain. The second day he had hit his head against a wall because she was too late to interfere. He had a large bruise at his forehead.

She had even asked Yaten if he could help her with a contact in the hospital. Thankfully he behaved like a normal human being and had some compassion left. She got more meds for Shikamaru without much ado, but she was sure one day Yaten would let them pay for his hospitality.

Her last report to Gaara had been full of different suggestions to handle the contracts with Kawa no Kuni. They need other trade routes. Yaten had proven to be unreliable. She hadn’t been in charge of negotiating contracts for years and since this time they wanted more than just trading goods, he showed his true colours.

She opened the door to their room cautiously. Shikamaru was still laying in his bed. She walked silently at his side and put a hand on his head.

“That tickles,” he said with a tired voice.

“Sorry, I didn’t want to disturb you,” she said and sat on the edge of the bed. “How are you feeling?”

“Better.”

He opened his eyes and tried to smile. She grabbed his hand.

“Do you think you can eat something? You haven’t eaten for days. I’m sure you’re starving.”

“It’s okay, Tem. Don’t worry.”

She snorted and shook her head. “I worry whenever I want.”

“I hate being this useless,” he said annoyed. “We are here so long and we still didn’t accomplish anything. And then I burden you with taking care of me.”

“It’s not a burden, Shika. Never think you’re a burden for me. I just want you to feel better. It hurts me to see you like this.”

“Maybe you should choose Yaten. He seems in good health and has a lot of money.”

Temari really wanted to punch him for his dumb remark, but just brushed some hair out of his face. 

“I’m sure it would be easier if I seduce him.”

He laughed. “You should show me some time how you would seduce him.”

She leaned forward to kiss him.

“First you recover and then I have a lot of things I want to show you.”

He pulled her to his chest and stroked her hair.

“I don’t know why you chose me, but I’m grateful you did.”

Temari closed her eyes and breathed in his scent. She didn’t know either how he had grown so much on her, but she didn’t question the path her life took until this point.

She hoped they could still stop the war that was threatening them. The last one already had destroyed Shikamaru.

* * *

It was past midnight and Gaara stood on the roof watching the stars.

He was restless. His mind was filled with the things that were happening in the world. He did everything he could and it wasn’t enough.

He had so much help. Splitting the duties with his siblings, speaking and writing with the other Kage. Relying on help from Konoha and Kumo. Keeping the people in Suna safe. He couldn’t do more than he already did. Still he felt useless.

Last time the main hospital in Suna approached him and asked if he could ask for help from Lady Tsunade. Since they had to handle war preparations it was out of question to ask for more. Konoha had lost as many shinobi as every other shinobi nation. They work with limited resources.

What bothered him the most was Iwa’s unreasonable behaviour. His main goal was to achieve permanent peace; he wasn’t alone with this mindset. Instead of cooperating Kurotsuchi started to seek her own way. She didn’t rely on the other great hidden villages.

He couldn’t wrap his head around her ignorance. She destroyed everything they achieved thus far. She didn’t give a chance for proving the Shinobi Alliance could work.

Gaara thought about visiting her. Just talk with her. Like Naruto did help him. But he knew she wouldn’t listen.

“Go back to sleep, Gaara,” a voice behind him interrupted his thoughts.

He turned around to see Baki standing behind him.

“I’ve slept enough,” he answered, “and how could I sleep while the world keeps turning?”

“You’ve done your job in the daytime. It’s important to get some rest in the nights.”

He looked to the stars again. “I know you’re right. But I can’t sleep properly until we have attended the meeting in the Land of Iron.”

“It’s not too late this time, Gaara. Also the daimyo need to give their approval.”

He nodded, not completely convinced. There was a lot of work to do. He hoped Baki was right.

* * *

She first thought that it was a hallucination when she walked to her apartment. It was the middle of the night after her double shift in hospital. She was exhausted and couldn’t trust her senses. But with each step she was sure it really was Ino in front of the building.

She rushed to her friend's side alarmed.

“Ino! Had something happened?”

Sakura recognized the bottle of wine in Ino’s hand. She didn’t answer and took another swig from the bottle.

“Hey, Sakura! You’re finally here!” She laughed and threw her hands in the air. “You work too much!”

Obviously this wasn’t her first bottle of wine. Sakura searched for her keys and helped a swaying Ino up the stairs.

At least she was able to slip off her shoes alone before she walked into the living room. She went into the kitchen and grabbed water and something to eat. Maybe Ino also was hungry.

It had been weeks since she last saw Ino. Both had been so busy with work and other things, that Sakura was shocked to see her friend like this. Ino stopped hiding that she was addicted to alcohol. A lot of people must have seen her this drunk.

As Ino pulled off her coat, Sakura chocked. Ino had lost so much weight. She could see her thin arms and lean muscles. Why didn’t she see this earlier?

“Here, I have something to eat.”

Ino cocked her head from one side to the other. “You’re so nice, Sakura. I can always count on you, can I?”

“Sure, Ino,” she answered and joined her on the sofa. “So how was your day?”

“Bad.” Ino bit into the sandwich she had given her. “Was at T & I today.”

Sakura watched her closely. There were days Ino just drank a bit to calm her nerves in the evening. She had tried to talk with her about this. She had talked with Shikamaru and Chouji. All of them were lost about what to do with Ino. Ino acted like nothing could stop her. But relying on alcohol at the age of seventeen wasn’t the answer to her problems. She needed to talk with a professional. Or at least talk at all.

“What did you do?”

“Can’t talk about it. Confidential.”

Ino finished the sandwich and reached for her bottle of wine. But Sakura pulled her outside of reach.

“Drink some water first.”

She opened the bottle and dropped a pill that dispersed at the contact with water. It would sober Ino and also make her sleepy. Sakura hated to trick Ino, but she didn’t want her to leave in this state.

Ino didn’t get suspicious and emptied the bottle.

“You’re a good friend, Sakura,” she said with a dull voice. “You know Chouji’s back?”

Her voice got more slurred.

“No, I didn’t know. How’s he?”

“We wanted to grab dinner. But he forgot me. Like everyone else.”

Sakura saw the tears in Ino’s eyes. She bit her lip. She felt so bad.

Over the last six months she had tried to get in contact with Ino. But maybe she hadn’t tried hard enough?

Ino slumped to one side and closed her eyes. The meds had knocked her out.

“I’m so sorry, Ino. I swear I’ll help you. From this day I will be a better friend.”

She wouldn’t keep this promise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I never had the drive to write a story this urgently like with this one.  
> The ideas and the plotlines appear faster in my mind than I can write them. 
> 
> Also the story is so complex, because of the different POV's and all the struggles each of the characters have. 
> 
> So thanks for everyone reading this and even more for all the comments! It means the world to me. :)


	9. Habits

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Maria Mena feat. Mads Langer - "Habits"
> 
> TW: Mention of Suicidal Thoughts / Actions

Ino didn't know how she got into Sakura's apartment. She remembered opening the third bottle of wine after Chouji had forgotten their appointment at YakinikuQ. Now she was sitting at her friend’s sofa feeling nauseous and dizzy. Her head still was sitting on her head, but she would be happier to replace it.

She could hear Sakura preparing food in the kitchen. The smells made her sick. She jumped up and ran into the bathroom.

She retched repeatedly and sweat ran all over her body. Ino hated when she had drunk more than she could handle. Normally one bottle of wine was enough. She could do her work and function the day after; she didn’t ask for more.

More wine made the people suspicious. It was hard to buy the amount of alcohol unseen in Konoha. People knew her too well. But she had found a retailer that didn’t ask many questions. She changed the places she bought her share of wine regularly. So far nobody had seen her.

However, her friends knew.

It was hard to hide it from Kiba. His jutsu made him sensitive to smells. She tried to hide it by showering twice a day and using perfume and lotions with flowery scents to cover her sweat; chewing gums and brushing her teeth three times a day also helped.

Chouji had been easier to distract. She knew he also had written with Shikamaru, but since he was in Kumo, she could tell him, she was okay and that he didn’t need to worry. She never had lied to him before, but it became easier as soon as she suppressed the guilt with another sip from her bottle of wine.

The hardest thing was to hide from Sakura and Shikamaru. Both were intelligent and observant. They had approached her on various occasions. Invited her for a walk, tried to make smalltalk and analyse her behaviour. Every time Sakura had to work longer and Shikamaru was in Suna, she was relieved.

They should mind their own business.

She could live without alcohol. The time her wrist had to heal she hadn’t drunk anything. The nightmares were hard and the trembling in her body made it impossible to tie bouquets, but it worked. That she had opened her first bottle after her wrist had been healed, wasn’t a bad sign. She had complete control.

Ino joined Sakura in the living room.

Her friend looked rested and so lively she wanted to yell at her.

How could she look so much more at peace than her? Sakura had lived through hell herself. She missed Sasuke and Sai as much as Ino. So why didn’t she struggle?

“Good morning, Ino. Do you want some tea?”

“I don’t have time. I need to work.”

Sakura’s smile didn’t leave her face but got wider.

“I know you’re busy, but I hoped we could catch up. It’s been ages we have met and just talked. I’m sure you have time for a cup of tea.”

Ino gave her a tight-lipped smile.

“I’m really sorry, Sakura. Thanks that I could crush at your place, but my mum will look for me when she realises I’m not home.”

“I called her,” Sakura answered and filled a cup with tea. “She said she can handle the shop on her own today.”

That left her speechless. She hadn’t thought that Sakura would trick her. Ino wanted to go home and take a shower, go back to sleep. All her excuses were useless. Sakura wanted her to stay and talk.

“Okay, I stay for a cup of tea. But then I go home.”

“That’s fine by me,” Sakura said and moved on the sofa so Ino could sit down.

* * *

It wasn’t even eight in the morning as one ANBU appeared at his door. His sister asked him if he had done something to anger the Hokage. But it was just a message he would be sent on a mission and was awaited for more orders at the Hokage’s office. So he grabbed some toast and left the house after the woman with the duck mask disappeared.

The village came to live as he walked with Akamaru past all the shops. The atmosphere was peaceful. He was at the level of the Yamanaka flower shop as Ino’s mother called him out.

“Good morning, Kiba!” she greeted him and carried a large vase with flowers.

“Morning,” he responded and took the vase out of her arms. “Do you need help?”

“Thank you, but I’m almost done." She arranged the flowers in the vase he had out down in front of the shop. "Are you on your way to the Hokage?"

He nodded and followed her inside. She gave him another vase he carried outside.

"Phew," she exhaled. "Done in time. I'm glad Sakura called me early to say Ino and she had a girls’ night and couldn't come over to help me. I'm so glad Ino has so many friends." Ino's mum wiped a hand over her face. "She has changed so much. I seldom see her these days. So it's good I know she has some company."

These words made him feel really uncomfortable. Kiba knew that Sakura had lied even without speaking with her. All of them covered Ino's dangerous behaviour, because they knew that her mother still grieved her husband and didn't need more worries in her life.

None of them would tell her that Ino was addicted to alcohol.

How Ino hid from her friends; found excuses to be alone; worked more than necessary; tried to cover her headache after drinking too much.

"Don't worry. We got her covered. Friends look out for each other." He gave Ino's mother a smile. "Next time you can call me for help."

She blushed and put a hand at her cheek.

"You don't have to do this. But thanks for the offer." She waved her hand. "But you need to go, Kiba. Thanks for your help."

He said goodbye and followed the street to the Hokage Tower.

Kiba would talk to Ino. It was one thing to lie to your friends. But treating her mother this way made him really angry. Her mother deserved better.

* * *

All her plans for the day disappeared into thin air. Sakura and she were called in by Tsunade. She borrowed some clothes from Sakura and took a quick shower.

Now they were waiting in front of the office.

Sakura tried to involve her into a conversation, but Ino blocked every attempt. She wasn't in the mood. Back at her apartment Sakura had, of course, asked how much she drank yesterday. Ino had bluntly lied to her and told her it was only one bottle.

Behind them the steps of two visitors reached her ear. She turned around to see who would join them. It was Kiba with Akamaru.

"Morning, girls," he greeted them and grinned. "Seems we are again on the same mission."

"Nice seeing you, Kiba. Hope this time I don't have to patch you up afterwards," Sakura responded.

He started laughing nervously and put a hand on his neck. "You sound like my sister." Then he turned to Ino. "I saw your mother. Helped her carry some vases. Hope you and Sakura had fun with your girls’ night."

_Girls’ night? Was this Sakura's excuse why Ino had slept outside?_

She couldn't believe Sakura had lied to her mother on her behalf. She felt so guilty.

"Oh, thank you, Kiba."

Shizune came to her rescue and called them into the office.

* * *

Kiba rushed back home and packed his bags for the mission. Then he was gone and hurried to Sakura’s place. He had decided they needed to do something. Seeing Ino this morning had made him sick. She had looked like a ghost.

Sakura apparently awaited him, because she had prepared tea.

They sat down on her sofa and Kiba wasn’t able to hold back any longer.

“What happened yesterday?”

Sakura took a sip from her cup. “Ino was so drunk she didn’t even remember how she got here. I gave her a pill that would sober her and make her fall asleep. It didn’t want her to go back home in this state.”

That was exactly what he had feared. After Ino not only found more and more excuses to avoid him and others, she now seemed to slide even deeper into the alcohol addiction. At some point a glass or bottle of wine wasn't enough.

He groaned. “Dammit! I can’t even describe how angry I am.” He threw his hands in the air. “It was just a coincidence I ran into Ino’s mum today. She lied to her mother. Ino never lied to any of us. And now it’s the new normal.”

“Getting angry won’t help her,” Sakura said and set down her cup. “I’ve talked to Chouji earlier. Seems Ino had shown up at the wrong time at YakinikuQ. And she was so upset she drank a lot.”

“We finally need to do something, Sakura.”

“I agree. But since talking didn’t help until now we have to do something different.” She sighed. “The thing is Ino doesn’t have a clear mind. She obviously has post-traumatic stress. Like each of us. And she adds more problems with drinking alcohol.”

“What do you mean with each of us?” he asked, startled. “I’m fine. And you also seem fine.”

Sakura laughed with a bitter tone. “No, I’m not fine. It’s exactly the opposite.” She grabbed her cup of tea again. “Do you have nightmares? Numb you pain with something? Seek for comfort? Or do you flinch from being touched? Hide yourself from the world? Do you remember the last time you felt real joy, Kiba?”

He knew that you could see the realization on his face because Sakura's smile, the one she always carried with her, became sad.

“You see all of us try to cope with our losses. There are some people who are better with those things. Naruto for example never loses his optimism. He knows how to overcome difficult situations,” she looked him dead serious in the eye. “Or look at Shikamaru: He already has lost Asuma before war. And he wants to protect Mirai. Also Temari is on his side to help him. He has changed a lot over the past months, but in his essence he still is the same person.”

“I don’t understand what you want to tell me.”

He really was confused. What had this to do with Ino? Didn’t they talk about how to help her earlier?

“Chouji, Neji, Tenten, Shikamaru, Naruto...they all have changed, but are you worried about them?”

“No,” he answered truthfully.

“But you’re worried about Ino, right?”

Something clicked inside his mind. “You want to tell me that Ino was hit worse than the rest of us?”

Sakura shook her head. “She shuts herself from everything. She doesn’t want to face reality. So she started to drink. She numbs her pain. Ino tries to forget instead of talking about her problems. The rest of us talk or look for a healthy way to overcome the after effects of war."

“I have nightmares,” he admitted. “And if I tell you how often I ended up with a woman in bed, you would scold me.”

Sakura raised an eyebrow and emptied her cup. “I also have nightmares. Do you think I can sleep peacefully after I wasn’t able to rescue them? I know I did my best, but I can’t shake this feeling that I’m responsible for each of their deaths. And the worst is that I had to let go of Sasuke. That I couldn’t do anything.”

Kiba saw her fighting back the tears. He reached out for her arm and wanted to comfort her somehow, but she took her arm outside of reach.

“Please, don’t touch me, Kiba. I can’t stand this.” She stood up. “We should make a plan for Ino. The first thing we need to do is to get her sober. Don’t worry about me. ”

He wanted to believe Sakura, that she was okay, but he was sure at some point she also would break down.

* * *

“Damn!” Ino cussed as she searched her room.

She had forgotten to buy more wine. Normally she had storage for one week. Out of frustration she had emptied the last three bottles yesterday. And her retailer didn’t open until nine in the evening. At that time she would be outside of Konoha with her team.

She sat on her bed and clenched her fists. She needed a new plan.

The last time she had a mission with Kiba he had noticed her trembling hands. So she had to make some preoccupations to be on the safe side this time. Pills were one solution and if she would've known the way to produce them, she wouldn't sit on her bed, lost about what to do next.

She considered her possibilities.

Stop drinking this abruptly wasn't an option. They could reach the Land of Rivers before she showed symptoms of alcohol deprivation

Should she take a gamble?

Ino shook her head. If their arrival was delayed it would get worse. She straightened her shoulders.

She knew about the secret storage of her father. There had been a time Inoichi had met with Shikaku and Chouza in their living room, smoking and drinking, while her mother was away. He had made her swear to never tell her mother. Therefore she knew where he had hidden his sake

The memory made her almost smile. She would've loved to hear her father's voice for one time. But she would never be granted this wish.

She had decided to help herself with sake this time. One time wouldn't hurt.

* * *

He didn't mind night watches during their missions. First of all he had an advantage with his nose, second he liked to be the guy who protects his teammates and third: he could watch Ino in her sleep.

Sakura and he had agreed to watch her closely; when Ino disappeared with poor excuses to take a drink or took longer to catch up with them. They needed to see the pattern; point out if she only poured the wine in the evening.

Apparently she switched her usual pattern and the alcohol. He had smelled the sake on her. Smelled it every time she had taken a sip from her flask.

Kami, did he hate to watch her. Search for hints of her addiction. He wanted to shake her until she realised what she was doing. Scream at her for her behaviour. But most of all hold and kiss her. Give her the comfort she needed and was seeking for so urgently.

She twitched in her sleep and whimpered. Kiba put a hand on her shoulder.

"Hush, Ino. I'm here, you don't have to fear anything."

* * *

It was raining as they arrived in Kawa no Kuni. Kiba led them to the accommodation. Temari awaited them in the lobby. Ino saw how stressed she looked and that made her worried about Shikamaru.

"How is he?" Sakura asked first before greeting.

"He needs morphine to get through the day."

Ino didn't know that it was this worse with Shikamaru. She didn't even know about the pain attacks until they got their mission. Her friendship had been better. She had cared about her friends. She did know everything about him; it had changed, she had changed. And it all began with her lies and the alcohol.

Since Sakura immediately went with Temari, Ino tried to get two rooms.

"We are sorry, but there's only one room we can offer you," the innkeeper said. "Unfortunately it has only one bed, but there's also a sofa."

"Is this really the last solution?"

"This season we have a lot of tourists. The people travel from far away to see the oasis within the desert, also known as the Land of Rivers."

Ino didn't mind sharing a room with her team. She was used to it. She just wanted to escape the observing eyes of Sakura and Kiba.

They had tried to be subtle. Hiding their concerns, but she wasn't dumb. Their watchful eyes would haunt her the whole mission. Last time in Suna she had more time alone.

"We take the room," Kiba answered and put the money on the table. "But inform us if there's more than one room available."

"Hai, sir."

"Let's take a look," Kiba said and invited her to follow him. "And we can get rid of the wet clothes. I see that you're freezing."

Since she couldn't get rid of Kiba so easily, she had to admit defeat for the time being. Because he was right she was really cold.

* * *

He had to admit Shikamaru had looked better before. Sakura had treated him the best she could but said they needed a hospital; be it in Suna or Konoha. Tanigakure wasn’t this advanced with the medical equipment. Temari had used her connection to the leader of Kawa no Kuni to get access to the hospital, but Sakura only came back shaking her head, because of the poor state inside the medical facility.

“Maybe Yaten would agree to join the alliances if I make a proposal to improve their medical knowledge,” Sakura suggested and put her green glowing hand on Shikamaru’s head. “Because I can’t advise you to stay longer, Shikamaru. I need to examine why you have this recurring headache.”

“Do you know if Naruto or Kakashi had success?” Shikamaru pressed his eyes together, because it seemed Sakura’s treatment was painful. Temari held his hand, while Ino sat silently on one of the chairs and kneaded the material of her skirt. She chewed on her lower lip.

Kiba knew what a guilt ridden Ino looked like.

He didn't need to read her mind. Ino was bad at hiding when something was bothering her. He'd watched her closely for the past few months. Even the years before, when he hadn't admitted to himself that his feelings for her were more than just friendly, he had been able to read her like an open book.

“Ishigakure wants a stronger bond with Iwagakure and doesn’t participate in the Shinobi Alliance. Naruto is currently in Kusa. But there was no news from Kakashi,” Kiba answered the questions.

Shikamaru opened his eye a slit and looked at him. “What did Lady Tsunade say about this?”

“She wants to wait another week. If nothing happens she sends reinforcements.”

“That’s too late,” Shikamaru mumbled, closing his eye again. “Something is happening in Ame.”

“First of all you should rest,” Sakura said and moved her hand to his blind eye. Kiba saw her hovering over the eye and gently touching the eyelid. Shikamaru groaned as she started infusing her chakra. His knuckles got white as he grabbed Temari’s hand tighter. He moved forward to take his friends other hand, but Ino was faster.

“Here, Shika. Take my hand, if it helps you.”

“Thanks, Ino.”

Kiba saw that Shikamaru smiled. Maybe Ino started to come out of her shell.

* * *

Her hand still was numb. Sakura had taken her time to treat Shikamaru. In the end he had fallen asleep.

She was watching her sleeping friend. She had stayed behind. Sakura would speak to the leader of Kawa no Kuni, while Temari and Kiba would talk with the ANBU. It was urgent they leave this place in at most three days. Shikamaru had inflammation in his destroyed nerve. Therefore the pain had increased over the last week.

The change of weather could have caused the inflammation, or a grain of sand, that Shikamaru didn’t notice. Sakura had applied antibiotics to his eye and did everything she could without hurting him even more, but it was just first aid.

She didn’t try to take it personally that they had left her behind. Somebody needed to take care of Shikamaru if it got worse again. The meds were laying on the nightstand.

Her gaze caught on the morphine. How much of it did she need so that she never woke up again? Morphine paralyzed breathing. It was a nice way to step out of life. She could argue that she had to give Shikamaru a dose because he was in so much pain. If she thought about it further, it wouldn't be difficult to get a little more of the remedy through Sakura. Her fingers went almost automatically to the prepared syringe.

She could finally put an end to all of this.

"I hope you are not up to what I think," Shikamaru said suddenly in a tired voice.

She recoiled and gasped for air.

“Oh, you’re awake. How do you feel?”

“Don’t change the topic, Ino.” Shikamaru raised his upper body higher on the pillow and looked at her with pinched eyebrows and a clenched jaw. “You need to stop destroying yourself. Since when do you drink sake? Isn’t the wine enough any longer? Don’t you see that you’re addicted?”

“How about you mind your own business, Shikamaru, hm?” she answered flippantly. “You decided to focus on other things. After war it was more important to fuck Temari than thinking about your friends. You were seldom in Konoha or had time for me. So I moved on.”

He sighed. “You pushed Chouji and me aside. You hid yourself,” he grabbed her wrist, that was still hovering in the air. “And really? You pull Temari into this? She helped me, for kami’s sake! If it wasn’t for her, I would have done the same you’re thinking about now!”

Shikamaru raised his voice and his anger was lingering through the room.

“You would never think about suicide,” she whispered and looked searcingly in Shikamaru’s face. “You’re stronger than me.”

He snorted and shook his head. “I have only one good eye left. The pain was unbearable sometimes. It would have been easy to grab a kunai and end my life. But every time I saw Temari in my mind, how she smiled at me. So I decided to live and didn’t regret it.” He gave her a sad smile. “Please stop giving up. Talk to us, Ino. It’s hurting to see you this broken.”

She wanted to say something but the door burst open and Kiba entered the room.

“We need Shikamaru,” he announced. “The ANBU had found something.”

Ino helped her friend to stand up. They left the room. But she shortly looked back to the morphine on the nightstand.

* * *

Watashi Yaten seemed not amused about the fact his third wife sat in front of him, covered in a lot of golden necklaces and with at least two gold rings on each finger. Kiba saw his moving Adam’s apple and smelled the sweat; he was scared.

“Would you mind telling us about the contract between you and your husband, Ayumi?” Temari said with a wide grin on her face, propped up on her open fan and looking at her nails.

Shikamaru stood right beside her, his hands lazy buried in his pants, with his eyepatch looking like wrath himself. Kiba never had seen him like this and tried to keep his composure, because he had to hold back the laughter in his throat.

“We decided that I would change my name and disappear. Yaten didn’t want to marry another woman,” Ayumi answered and looked with a stone-cold expression at her husband. “I wanted a divorce, but Yaten only agreed on this, if he would convince the Kazekage to let him marry his sister. So I waited.”

“That’s not true!” Yaten shouted. “I never said this!”

“We have written proof of this,” Kiba said and gave Shikamaru the documents Ayumi had handed them. Shikamaru’s face was plastered with an indefinable look between amusement and disgust.

“I see he granted you a lot of money to hold up your cover. Did your husband contact you during the last week?”

Ayumi nodded. “He said that this is his chance to finally get divorced from me. He wanted to put enough pressure on Temari-san to agree into marrying him. Because he knew it was his only chance.”

Yaten jumped out of his chair. “Where’s your proof for that?” he dared her. “Tell me, Ayumi?”

“Actually, we don’t need a written proof for this,” Kiba intereferred. “See this woman?” He pointed to Ino, who was standing with Sakura on a wall, next to the ANBU. “She’s from the Yamanaka clan. She can use her jutsu to read your mind.”

The leader of Kawa no Kuni shrunk into his chair and made really embarrassing noises.

Temari leaned forward, just inches away from his face.

“You have two options, Yaten,” she said with a sweet voice. “Either you agree to all the contracts from Suna and Konoha and join the Shinobi Alliance. Or I tell Gaara and Kankuro about your nasty, little threat against their sister. Choose wisely.”

Watashi Yaten had no other choice than to agree to the new contracts.

* * *

As they decided to leave the next day Ino was proud she hadn’t drunk all day. She was a bit nervous but that was normal. She never had been in the Land of Rivers and it was foreign to her. It was totally okay to feel a bit of unrest. She was human and not a machine.

After Shikamaru had called her out she wanted to prove him wrong. She wasn’t an addict and he would soon see this. All of them were wrong.

She walked behind her friends, who were talking cheerfully, while they looked for a place to grab a meal. Ino thought Tanigakure was a nice place. The stars were blinking on the sky above them, while the streets were illuminated with torches. She saw that Shikamaru took Temari’s hand in his. She blushed a little, but seemed to be on par with showing affections in the public. Sakura explained something to Kiba and laughed because of a funny remark he made. Ino saw his teeth flashing.

They all were happy, and had made peace with the circumstances. Why couldn’t she be like this?

“Who also fancies a decent curry?” Temari asked them and turned around. “Because I know just the right place.”

“Are there dogs allowed?” Kiba wanted to know as Akamaru barked.

“I know the owner. He once lived in Suna and he owes me a favour.”

“Do I want to know why?” Shikamaru asked curiously but with a smirk on his face.

“Sure, I dated his son a while ago,” she answered and walked ahead laughing at his expression. “Come on, crybaby!”

Sakura giggled because Shikamaru ran after his girlfriend. Only she and Kiba stayed behind.

“Let's go, Ino,” Kiba said and stretched out his hand. “Don’t miss out on the fun.”

As Akamaru barked at her, she took his hand. Maybe it would help her to change her mindset just a little and she would understand why her friends were in a better state than her. Kiba’s hand felt good in hers.

_Screams filled the air, so many screams she wasn’t able to understand if someone was searching for her. She had lost sight of her friends and nobody was near her. All she could do is defend herself._

_Ino was scared. The days of fighting without a decent breakt took its toll on her body. The exhaustion was real. Since their enemies had scattered the medical units and the divisions, she could only rely on herself. She tried not to look too closely at the bodies of her dead comrades around her. She didn’t want to know now if more of her friends had died._

_She grabbed every weapon, blocked the attempts of her enemies to catch or stab her and she did it without much effort. Ino was thrilled that it worked so well. She had the confidence to fight her way out._

_But then she felt the pain, looked down at her stomach and saw the blood._

Ino still felt the pain as she woke up and threw the blankets away that were smothering her. She couldn’t breathe, the tears were streaming down her face and her hand reached for the spot at her stomach area that hurt. She gave a whimper of pain.

“Ino?” Kiba asked from the other side of the room.

Her whole body trembled and she couldn’t answer. It hurt too much and the dream was still in her mind. She wailed and bent forwards trying to get control over the pain.

His hands were warm and touched her lightly. Ino didn’t fight him. He sat on the bed and pulled her closer, rocked her back and forth like a child, while she sobbed.

It took her a lot of time to get back into reality. Again it was Kiba’s presence that calmed her down. She didn’t know why he was this comforting for her, but for once she just accepted that he helped her.

“What scared you?” he asked softly after she stopped crying and pressed her face to his chest, listening to his heartbeat.

“The war,” she said. “It’s always the war. Never something else.”

She heard Kiba swallow hard. “Is this why you drink, Ino?”

“Yes."

He stroked her hair and pressed her closer. The tiredness caught up with her again and she would not have minded falling asleep cuddled up against Kiba. He was warm and it felt good to be held that way.

“Where’s Sakura?” she asked suddenly realising she was missing.

“Shikamaru needed treatment. She left half an hour ago.”

“Oh, okay.” She yawned. “I’m totally exhausted.”

She reluctantly broke away from him, but she knew that it was absolutely not appropriate to sit with him like this. She didn't want to give him false hopes. The kiss on the cheek when they were eating together in Konoha already had been too much.

“If you want Akamaru will stay with you,” Kiba offered as he stood up. “It helps me a lot.”

His smile was still visible in the dark.

“I’m not sure if Sakura is fond of the idea to share a bed with me and a dog.”

Kiba laughed shortly as Akamaru made a disapproving noise.

“Good night, Ino.”

He leaned forward and put a kiss on the top of her head.

Something that friends also didn’t share with each other.

* * *

Kiba was happy they reached Konoha in around three hours. Their last night in the Land of Rivers he had stepped over some boundaries between Ino and him. He just wanted her to feel better. He could've gone back to the sofa and his well deserved sleep after Ino had stopped crying, but the idiot he was, he had given her a kiss.

And Ino clearly remembered this. She had avoided him during their trip, making sure not to look into his direction or accidentally touching him. He had hoped she would finally open up to him. Instead it was the opposite.

It was frustrating that he needed to start over again. All his careful attempts were forgotten because he got carried away. Holding her had been the best feeling in the world, even if she was crying, because she allowed his closeness for once. But he would not give up that easily.

They reached the path that led straight to Konohagakure and jumped down from the trees. As he landed a scent drifted into his nose.

"Stop," Kiba whispered. "I smell someone."

Behind him his teammates got ready to fight. He smelled the metal of the kunai and the explosives of the paper bombs, Temari opened her tessen and Sakura was cracking her knuckles. Akamaru moved in front of him.

He tried to identify the smell because it triggered a memory. It was a familiar scent but it seemed a long time he had traced it.

"Sakura, follow me," he ordered.

"Would you mind telling us what your plan is?" Temari burst out. 

"The person I smelled is hurt. And I know her. I don't want to scare her or put anyone in additional danger."

"If you don't come back in ten minutes we will follow you," Shikamaru decided. "Ino, keep in touch with them."

It wasn't that far into the thicket until they found their target. Sakura gasped as she recognized the person at the stream. Kiba followed her at a safe distance.

He hadn't seen the woman for almost a year now; he didn't even remember her name. The only reason she was present in his memory were her unmistakable red hair and the smell of her body that somehow reminded him of Naruto.

"Karin!" Sakura said and knelt beside her. "What are you doing here?"

Kiba also got to the ground. He supported her into a sitting position, while Sakura started her examination. He felt her bones through her clothes. Her state was bad.

"W-water…," Karin stuttered.

Sakura grabbed her flask and handed it to the weak woman. Her face was worried and her eyebrows were pinched together. Seldom Sakura looked this serious.

Karin regained some strength after hydrating and gave the flask back to Sakura.

"How far are we from Konoha?" she asked and tried to stand up.

Kiba stopped her.

"Firstly we ask the questions," he said.

Karin produced something like a chuckle. It sounded so wrong. Sakura shook her head to signal him that she had no serious injuries.

"As if you care. I know your chakra signature. You were with Sakura last year to hunt down Sasuke."

The woman started to laugh. The hair on his neck started to rise.

"I don't know what's so funny," he remarked annoyed.

"Of course," she said and backed away from him. "You're from the Inuzuka clan, aren't you?"

"Yes, but I don't know what you want to tell me."

"Use your jutsu and maybe you will find out what's so funny."

Kiba concentrated chakra into his nose and smelled another person nearby. The scent was younger. As he realised what he had tracked, he looked with wide eyes at Karin. She grinned.

"I did everything to protect him," she said.

"To protect who, Karin?" Sakura asked, startled.

"Uchiha Sasuke's child," Kiba answered for her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maybe I'm a bit sorry to keep you waiting until the next chapter before you get to know Karin's story.


	10. Stitches

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Shawn Mendes - "Stitches"

He hurried through the hallways and didn’t give a damn about the people who were shouting he should stop running. He was still tired from his mission, but he needed to know if it was real. He heard that his friends had come back from a mission with Karin and a child, that she claimed to be Sasuke’s. He couldn’t rest until he had talked with Sakura.

This couldn’t be true. The rumours just were rumours. Like the normal gossip travelling through the Hokage tower.

He ran deeper into the building and kept looking for the pink hair of his friend. She had to be here. Sakura was always at the hospital. She practically lived in this place. He had to make sure he dragged her out of the building from time to time so she would stop overworking herself.

“If you don’t bring me the meds immediately I will give a message to the Hokage that you’re hindering my work.”

That was the voice he had searched for.

“Sakura-chan! Here you are!”

She had tied up her hair and was wearing her typical white doctor's coat.

“Naruto, what are you doing here?”

He came to a stop. “I heard you are back and that Karin is with you.”

The nurse she had scolded before disappeared and Sakura ushered him into the next room.

"Who told you this?" she asked him and pushed him on a chair.

"I wanted to give Granny Tsunade my mission report. But before I reached her office I heard a conversation between some of the Jounin."

Sakura groaned and put a hand on her forehead. "I will kill Genma."

"So is it true?"

She turned his back to him and opened the cupboard with medicine, searching for something.

"Yes, it is Karin. And she has a baby. But we don't know if it's Sasuke's."

Her hands opened a glass with green pills, she took out ten and placed them in a smaller container. Then she put the glass back and took out another glass. This time two black pills.

"We took some blood from her and the baby. Since we have stored all data about the Uchiha clan inside the hospital, we can see if there is a match between the baby and Sasuke's DNA."

Naruto saw that Sakura pressed her hands into the plate of the cabinet.

"Can you believe this, Naruto?" she said with a trembling voice. "He said he loved me, but got a child with another woman? Why?"

"You have to ask, Karin," Naruto said with a gentle voice. "After all she says it's his child."

She didn't answer but left the room and slammed the door shut. Naruto stared at his feet.

_What have you done, Sasuke?_

The pills Sakura had searched for stood forgotten on the counter.

* * *

It had been an almost impossible task to find a nurse, who wasn't to inept giving her a bottle with milk for the baby and Temari sighed in relief as she stepped inside the room, where Shikamaru tried to calm down the child.

He walked around the room, talking with a soft voice to the little boy, patting the back of the baby. Temari thought a baby suited him, blushing, realising a second too late, that it was definitely not the right time to think about kids now. She was only twenty, and he was seventeen. They had plenty of time to get children. First of all they had to get married; and prevent another war.

She shuddered because her mind got carried away.

 _You need to focus_.

"Do you want to feed him?" she asked and approached Shikamaru.

He had stopped his walk in front of the window. His head turned slowly in her direction. She had interrupted his thoughts.

"Thanks, Tem."

He went to one of the chairs and Temari sat across him, watching how he cradled the baby in his arms, before he started feeding him. Shikamaru had a lot of practice since Mirai was a few months older. He wasn't scared to hold such a tiny, fragile human.

Temari had carried the boy the whole way to Konoha since the rest of their team was too shocked about the fact that the baby should be Sasuke's child. Shikamaru had taken the lead and ordered Kiba to carry Karin on his back, Ino and Sakura should run ahead to warn the Hokage of their arrival.

Of course the gossip started as they passed the gate. Shinobi were curious kreachers and loved to gossip.

"Do you think it is his child?"

Shikamaru had looked into the child's face thoughtfully.

"I don't know. It's possible after all," he answered and stroked the little face with one of his fingers. "But I hope he's not Sasuke's child."

"Because he would be the last Uchiha?"

Shikamaru nodded. "I saw how the burden of his clan destroyed Sasuke, but never did anything. I was a spoiled kid. I had my parents, my clan, my friends." He sighed. "Maybe it's also my fault that he's dead. I couldn't bring him back when I was twelve. But what if I had acted sooner? Invite him over for dinner?"

Temari shortly closed her eyes and exhaled. "You're not responsible for all the bad things in the world."

"I know," he answered and looked at her. "But I'm still judging myself."

* * *

“I knew he didn’t love me,” Karin whispered. “He always loved you, Sakura. But he was scared and needed comfort. It just happened. I realised after war I was pregnant with his child.”

Sakura looked into Karin’s eyes, searching for the signs of a lie, but she couldn’t find any hint. The woman in front of her told the truth. Karin was just a patient like any other. She had to detach from her personal feelings or else she would scream.

“Why did you hide your pregnancy? You could have come sooner to Konoha, Karin. Why now?”

“Orochimaru tried to find me,” she answered and clutched the fabric of the sheets on the bed. Sakura saw tears streaming down her face. “Sasuke hated his experiments. So I had to make sure his child is safe. And Orochimaru would’ve searched here first.”

She believed her. Each of them knew what Orochimaru was capable of. Sakura had heard the stories of his experiments firsthand from Tsunade when they spoke about morality and ethics as a medic.

Karin was obviously traumatized. Her body showed signs of starvation. Life had been hard on her.

“You should rest for now. You’re safe inside these walls and so is your child.”

“His name is Kouki.”

 _Happiness, Hope, Light_...what a meaningful name. Sakura grabbed her hand and squeezed it.

“I’ll come back later.”

“Do you believe me, Sakura? Please tell me you believe me?”

“I believe you, Karin. I truly do.”

She gave her a smile and left the room.

Sakura made two steps until she fell to the floor, a hand in front of her mouth to silence the screams.

Of all the things Sasuke had done to her and Naruto, to Kakashi and all of their friends, this was the thing Sakura had expected the least.

She gulped and wiped a hand over her eyes. Tsunade awaited a report. Later she could break down.

* * *

The smell of coffee was what made his life worth living those days. He couldn't count the hours he had sat with Gaara in the sheer endless meetings with Suna's Council. Worst part of it wasn't the meetings; they just didn't end in any result.

The elders wanted to start war against Iwa without Konoha. One of the men had suggested to join forces with Iwa and tear Konoha down. That had Gaara made turn around and leave the meeting. Normally Gaara didn't act like this. But Kankuro could understand him. He was fed up with this situation like him.

Even Kirigakure had contacted Iwa and received the same answer like Karui and Omoi: Kurotsuchi wanted to have Tsunade. Because she was the cause for the death of her grandfather. At least that's what she told everyone.

He filled his mug til the brim with the steamy coffee and added just a spoon with honey from his secret storage. He stirred three times, took the spoon out and licked the rest of the honey from the spoon. Kankuro would never admit that he loved the little hint of sweetness in his coffee. Every time he drank coffee with his siblings he couldn't use home, or sugar. They would mock him because of it. So he took this seldom opportunity when he was alone.

Kankuro had his own thoughts about Kurotsuchi and Iwagakure. Every village had lost so many shinobi to defeat Madara and Obito. The dead bodies sometimes haunted him in his dreams. So many comrades and friends that died too young.

Long time ago he thought different about being a shinobi. He was full of anger and hatred himself. His own brother had been used as a mere tool for the benefit of the village. He didn't know what it meant to be loved and was left alone with that demon inside him. Threatend to kill his siblings when Shikaku's bloodlust took over again.

And then Naruto made a difference. He changed Gaara.

Therefore he didn't want another bloodshed. He was grateful for Konoha's alliance.

He wanted to sit down and work through the paperwork on his desk, as the sound of an explosion echoed through the streets and let his coffee swap out of the mug.

* * *

Ino was unsure what to do next.

She walked up and down her bedroom, knowing nothing could calm her down. She had to wait until sunset. If she sat through the afternoon without a drink, she could make it till she went to sleep. Small steps would bring her forward. She had made this promise to herself. She had walked the wrong path.

Shikamaru’s hurt face haunted her. Kiba’s calming voice after she had woken from her nightmare. Sakura’s concerns after she had appeared at her doorstep drunken. Ino knew it was time to act like an adult.

The sake in her flask was already empty. She hadn’t drunk it, but drowned it in the sink of her home after coming home. But she knew where the rest of her father’s storage was.

_Should she tell her mother?_

She pulled at her fingers. She was stronger than this, so much stronger than her body. She just had to overcome the symptoms. The trembling and sweating, her mouth being dry and the sickness. It wasn’t that hard.

The doorbell rang. That was unusual to such a time. All the people she knew were working or busy with Sasuke’s baby.

 _Sasuke’s baby_.

Her mind was still engaged with processing this information.

He had slept with this woman - if she told the truth - and now there was this baby with dark eyes and black hair, without a father.

Ino made her way down the stairs as the doorbell rang a second time.

In front of her house was Chouji munching on his favourite chips.

“Hey, Ino. Can I come in?”

* * *

“Don’t you want to lay down, Tenten?” Neji asked as she was standing with her head bent over the railing, trying to control the seasickness.

“It doesn’t matter,” she answered and groaned. “It’s always like this. Every time I see a ship my nausea starts acting up.”

“Should I make you a tea?”

Tenten wanted to answer, but her stomach contracted again and she threw up more bile into the sea. Her throat already felt sore. She grabbed the bottle with water Neji gave her, took a sip and spit it out.

Their departure again had been delayed. The fog that surrounded Mizu no Kuni had gotten so thick no ships or boats travelled between the islands and most of all not to the shore of the Land of Fire. She had forgotten to pack enough pills that kept her motion sickness at bay. This was the result.

She couldn’t wait to set foot on solid earth again. She didn’t trust the planks that were screeching and moving under her.

“Could you ask the captain how long it takes until we reach the shore? I’m sure this will help me.”

Neji pressed a light kiss on her hand and walked to the captain.

She was sad. Soon they would act like they weren’t a pair. Tenten didn’t blame Neji. He didn’t want to put her into the spotlight. It was difficult enough for him to get the Hyuuga elders to agree to some small changes inside his clan. If they found out he dated a normal girl outside his clan, Neji’s position inside his clan was in danger. She knew that it bothered him a lot that they stayed longer in Kirigakure. He didn’t know if Hanabi was able to keep up against all the pressure.

Tenten thought Hanabi did a great job thus far. She had her opinion, she defended mercilessly, and a clear vision for the future of her clan. Neji should trust his cousin. She would do well.

She looked in the direction where Neji had disappeared. He walked back to her, his forehead frowned. Tenten decided to distract his thoughts for once and gave him a smile.

His mouth twitched lightly.

Then the ship made a movement that let her lose the balance. Then she heard an explosion not far away. She was swept off her feet, over the railing into the cold water.

* * *

Shikamaru was back at the Hokage tower in the meeting room. Temari had stayed in the hospital to watch Karin and the baby. Additionally some ANBU stood guard inside the hospital and outside to make sure nothing happened to either of them.

Konoha was on high alert. It was possible Orochimaru attacked them. He sighed as he looked outside the windows. As if it wasn’t enough Iwagakure wanted Tsunade’s death, now they had brought more chaos into this whole mess.

The room filled with people. Tsunade and Shizune were the first to arrive. Next followed Kiba, Sakura and Naruto. He put a hand on his head, where his right eye still was hurting. For a few hours he had forgotten the pain. He had felt useful. Almost like his old self. Sakura would surely drag him back into the hospital after the meeting and he would reluctantly agree.

Losing his full eyesight was one thing, but this unbearable pain attacks something else. He already had scared the hell out of Temari. She had dark circles under her eyes, because she had stayed up all night to care for him. She shouldn’t need to do this.

He heard the door closing. Shikamaru turned around to face his friends and the Hokage.

“We make this meeting short. There are already various rumours spreading through the village,” Tsunade started her speech. “We have Kusagakure and Kawa no Kuni as our allies. They will attend the first meeting of the Shinobi Alliance. Kirigakure had sent word they also agreed to this meeting. Neji and Tenten had a delay on their trip back home.” She nodded to all of them. “Kumo and Suna were on our side from the beginning.”

“Where’s Kakashi-sensei?” asked Naruto. “He headed out to our mission at the same time. Shouldn’t he be back?”

“There has been no contact since he left Konoha,” Shizune answered his question.

“Did you already send some reinforcements, Lady Tsunade?” Shikamaru wanted to know. As expected she shook her head.

“For real?" Kiba burst out. "Kakashi-sensei is one of our most important shinobi inside the village and just sit here and wait?"

That surprised Shikamaru. It was normally Naruto who attacked Tsunade directly.

"Kiba is right," Naruto added. "Why did you do nothing, Granny Tsunade?"

"Calm down you two," Sakura said and raised her hands.

"Tell me who I should send?" Tsunade said and glared angrily at Kiba and Naruto. "We have lost thousands of shinobi in the last war. All my Anbu I can spare are in different villages. We have minimal protection inside the village. I send Genin to B missions, inexperienced Jounin to S missions. I even had to recruit retired shinobi to secure the safety inside Konoha."

"Naruto was near Amegakure," Shikamaru said and cut her words. "He's capable of this task."

He stood up to underline his words. It was much more difficult to work with Tsunade since the end of the war. Shikamaru knew she was hiding something.

"You're just my advisor, Nara Shikamaru," Tsunade said coldly. "Not the Hokage."

"But he's right, Lady Tsunade," Shizune said and also raised from her chair.

"It was Kakashi's will," Sakura mumbled. "He said that nobody should search for him if something happens."

"Sakura-chan! Why do you know this?"

Sakura had a cocked smile on her face, looking at her lap. "He invited me to Ichiraku and wanted me to promise that I wouldn't search for him if something happens. That I should stop you from following, Naruto."

Tears sparkled in her eyes. Shikamaru thought that she looked like a goddess of justice, ready to fight her enemy. Sakura had grown up so much since their Genin days. He had to admire her for her strength.

"And we should listen to Kakashi-sensei. We need to protect Sasuke's child."

* * *

Chouji had left Ino with a guilty conscience. They hadn't seen each other for months and it had filled him with so much anger and sorrow to see his teammate, his friend in such a bad state. Of course he knew about the alcohol. He had written long, long letters with Shikamaru. It was even worse seeing it with his own eyes.

He hadn't enough imagination to think further ahead but if Ino would crumble even more it was too late helping her. He was lucky he had ran into Naruto. He had told him about the mysterious child and Chouji knew it would upset Ino.

He turned into the next hallway of the hospital and pushed open the door to room 217. A woman with blond hair jumped up as she heard his steps approaching. Chouji grinned.

"It's just Chouji, Tem. I'm sure he doesn't mind if we kiss," Shikamaru said laughing.

"It's not appropriate," Temari answered and blushed. "Hello, Chouji."

"Hi Temari. Nice seeing you. Do whatever you want and have fun," he answered with a wink and came to an halt in front of Shikamaru's bed. "It's good to see you again, mate."

He took his best friend into a tight bear hug. Chouji hadn't missed many things in Kumo, but there were a few. One of these had been Shikamaru and Ino. They had gone through thick and thin, fought side by side and never turned away from each other. He missed watching clouds with his best friend.

"Have you seen, Ino?" Shikamaru asked after Chouji had occupied a chair.

  
Shikamaru linked one of his hands with Temari, who still had a hint of red on her cheeks.

"She cried a lot," he answered and hummed. "I didn't know it was this bad, Shikamaru. I should have come home sooner."

"She will get better," Temari said with a fierce look. "Ino is strong. She just needs the right person she trusts enough to open up."

"We've known each other for a long time. She can trust us," Chouji responded.

"Because of that, she doesn't talk."

Shikamaru moved his position a little. Temari brushed her thumb over his hand.

"I don't understand this, Shikamaru. We won't do her harm. We want the best for Ino."

This was ridiculous. Ino could trust them with everything. He would trust both of them with his life.

"She doesn't feel safe any longer. The war had robbed her from so many things…" Temari made a gesture with her other hand. "Ino wants to be strong and independent. Therefore she acts this strange. She sees how all of you can handle the after effects of war. In her eyes she's a failure."

"Women are really troublesome," Shikamaru sighed what earned him a pair of rolling eyes from Temari.

"I see," Chouji said. "But what should we do?"

"Be yourself and act like you did before war. I'm sure it will help her."

Chouji's stomach started to rumble. He hadn't eaten enough today and this was his body's revenge.

"So when do they start your treatment, Shikamaru? I think I need something to eat."

Both Shikamaru and Temari burst into laughter.

* * *

Karui yelled orders around and luckily the Chuunin and Genin obeyed. She hadn't enough patience to watch each step of her people. They needed to rescue the civilians that were buried under the shambles of the school.

It was a surprise attack. She cussed under her breath as she re-entered the building, searching for more kids.

Her eyes caught the glimpse of some hair in one classroom.

"Oh damn."

She knelt beside the girl. Her foot was stuck under a table.

"Hey, little one. Are you hurt?"

Her eyes were blue and reminded her of a certain ninja that she once had beat up. The face of the girl was covered in dirt. A cut was on her forehead.

She nodded.

"My name is Karui. How's your name?"

"Kairi," she whispered. "Am I dead?"

Karui smiled and reached for her hand.

"I'm here to rescue you. Can you move."

Again she nodded.

Karui looked if she had other injuries but was glad there was nothing. She could lift the table a bit without the danger to cause instability of the building. She had to act quickly. 

"I will move the table," she said to Kairi. "When I say three you try to crouch as far away as you can, okay?"

"Yes."

She put on some gloves and grabbed the table. With her shoulder she secured the shelf that had fallen onto the table. She took a deep breath and counted till three.

Kairi moved herself, whining because of the pain, but she was a brave girl and didn't stop moving until Karui put down the table again.

Then suddenly a wall started to crack. She was too far away from Kairi to protect her, she only could jump aside, she didn't get hit herself. She covered her head. Stones and shambles were hitting her back, taking her breath away. It was worse than she thought.

"Karui!" someone called her name. She looked up to see Omoi standing in front of her, Kairi save in his arms, one of his silly lollipops in his mouth. He let his Katana slide back into its holder.

"You're a lifesaver, Omoi."

"Can you stand up?" He reached out a hand. She grabbed it and got into a standing position.

"I'll find those bastards and kill them."

Attacking her village was one thing, dragging innocent children into this another. She would kill Kurotsuchi herself the next time

* * *

He had secured the passengers on the ship, made sure to fix the hole of the blast of the explosion and contacted the Mizukage for further instructions. Then he went down the ship to his and Tenten's cabin.

He still needed to change his clothes. He had jumped into the water to rescue Tenten from drowning and he started to freeze. With horror he saw her shocked face as she flew over the railing. Like him Tenten could walk on water with infusing chakra to her feet. The problem was they were at high sea. And the waves had swept high. He couldn't be sure she would handle it on her own. Mostly because the motion sickness had taken its toll on her.

Neji pushed open the door and saw her sitting at the table, hands around a steamy mug with tea, around her shoulders a thick blanket.

"Do you feel better, Tenten?" he greeted her and bowed down to give her a kiss. She had opened her hair to let it dry. It was seldom he saw her without her buns. He loved how much softer it made her look.

"You're cold," she whispered at his lips.

"It's okay. I just need to change."

She put her mug on the table and raised off the chair. "I can help you with that."

Tenten grinned so mischievously he knew she had an agenda. As her hands grabbed his shirt he understood her intentions. She opened his sash and pulled his shirt off his shoulder.

"Weren't you sick earlier?" he asked unsure what to think of this sudden change of events.

"Got some pills which treat seasickness from another passenger," Tenten answered and nibbled on his ear. Neji had to swallow. He liked the idea she had in mind, but their cabin was small. They didn't fit into a bed.

"Shouldn't we wait?" he said as her hand opened his pants and played with the hem of boxers. "There isn't enough space."

She giggled and knelt down, getting rid of the rest of his clothes.

"We have a table. That's enough."

* * *

The explosion had hit the hospital and the buildings surrounding it. Gaara had rushed on his sand to the district in Suna, helping to stabilize the apart falling buildings. Kankuro was shouting instructions to several people, who were doing the same with their chakra-threads and puppets.

The screams of the people were drifting through the air. He saw the nurses and medics rushing inside and outside the building to rescue the patients. They treated the people that were hit by the pieces, stones, glass and other rubble.

He built a sand wall to protect them and hurried to Kankuro's side.

"Do you know what happened?" he asked him.

Kankuro shook his head and moved his fingers to pull away a broken wall, which Gaara instantly replaced with sand. It would cost a fortune to rebuild the hospital. The council wouldn't be amused.

The last months were like a constant fight against the council of Suna. They weren't easy to persuade from the start, because he was too young and inexperienced. Their choice for the next Kazekage had been Temari. But she refused from the start. Kankuro had just laughed and left the room. Gaara wanted this. Never in his life he had wanted something so badly.

Suna had treated him wrong. Most still feared him because of Shukaku. The people in his village were unforgiving like the desert. A mistake wasn't forgotten easily.

And the council was the village in a nutshell. They wanted to force Suna to war against Iwagakure without the help of Konoha. He couldn't count how often he had talked to the wind daimyo the last months.

He held up more walls from the failing buildings. The attack on the hospital came without a warning. He didn't know what happened. Nobody had alarmed him that an intruder had sneaked into the village.

Explosives were the speciality of Iwagakure. There were some Kekken Genkai users like Deidara or Gari with the power to perform jutsu that were based on earth release in combination with lightning and resulted in explosions.

Was it possible this was a threat from Iwa? He didn't dare to think this way, but it couldn't be a coincidence.

A Jounin under Kankuro's order hurried to them.

"Kazekage-sama! Kankuro-dono! We found something."

He handed Kankuro a white mass that was oddly familiar.

"This is clay," Gaara stated and looked in his brother's face.

"Contact Konoha, Gaara. Iwa had done the first move."

* * *

Kiba was still angry that Tsunade didn't want to send reinforcements to Ame. He couldn't believe she gave in to Kakashi-sensei's request. Did she expect them to stand by and do nothing?

He was even surprised that Naruto didn't storm out to do something. He wouldn't hesitate if it was Kurenai. They all knew what Shikamaru did to take revenge on his sensei's death. So how could Naruto and Sakura do nothing? 

Sure, they were confused and maybe hurt that Karin appeared with Sasuke's child. But did this justify they didn't give a damn about their former sensei?

He growled as he walked further away from Konoha's center to the training grounds. He hadn't a specific place in mind. He just followed Akamaru, who had found a trace of a squirrel or any other animal he loved to chase around.

Kiba put his collar higher because of a cold breeze. Then he realised it wasn't a natural wind flow. His eyes caught the movement of two women.

The wind was caused by Temari. She jumped around the training grounds and dodged all the weapons Ino was throwing at her.

"You can do better, Yamanaka!" Temari shouted as she opened her fan once more to hit Ino. "Even Shikamaru with one eye is better at aiming than you!"

Ino made a backward somersault and threw a hand-full of shuriken at Temari.

"I know you're lying," Ino answered her. "He was never better than me."

Kiba was amazed to see those two fighting with each other. He saw how heavy both women were breathing. Their sparing seemed to go on for a while. Ino looked really beat up. He smelled blood, sweat and dirt.

"When was the last time you have trained? Looks like I'm winning," Temari remarked with a sly grin.

Kiba didn't want to interrupt them. He whistled to call back Akamaru. A spar between friends surely would ease Ino's mind. And if not he hoped she wouldn't grab another bottle of wine. 


	11. Heart-Shaped Box

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Nirvana - "Heart-Shaped Box"

"I've a mission for you."

Sakura had been so absorbed in the medical records that she didn't notice Tsunade had entered her office. She put her pen aside and looked into the Hokage's face.

"What kind of mission?" she asked and straightened her back.

"You go to Suna, help rebuild the hospital and do some research."

"Is there any particular reason you want to send me away, shishou?"

Sakura crossed her arms as Tsunade came to her desk and placed herself on the edge.

"You're not happy here in Konoha. I can see that." Tsunade took a pen into her hands and played with it. "Also you never snapped at the nurses and other medics before. You used to love your job. But it's different. War changed you, and not to the better."

She knew her mentor was right. The hospital always was her home. The place she became a medic ninja but also a better kunoichi. Her fabulous chakra-control was the key to her strength. A new world opened to her the moment she healed her first patient.

In war she finally had reached her full potential. She felt almighty, invincible and most of all she didn't need to stay back like before. She could walk side by side with Naruto and Sasuke. Fighting along with them. She was useful and not a burden. Like she had imagined since the day she asked Tsunade to teach her.

"I can't bear this any more," she answered thoughtfully, "You're right that I loved my job. But now I'm totally exhausted. I don't see a purpose in healing, because they die either way. And since Karin and Sasuke's child are here, I can't sleep properly."

Tsunade turned her head into Sakura's direction. "So you will take the mission? I think this will help you to get some peace. And I'm sure you capable of doing this."

"When will I start?"

* * *

Kankuro kicked a pebble with his foot and exhaled deeply. He had agreed to pick up Sakura at the gates because Gaara had asked him. Normally this was Temari's job, but she would go to Nami no Kuni and do some research for Kirigakure until they would meet again in the Land of Iron. The ship that caused the explosion had sailed from there to head to Kumo. She was accompanied by Shikamaru and Chouji.

He wanted to step outside the village so urgently it hurt. The last time was when he brought the message by Gaara to Darui; too much time he had to stay put.

Suna needed him inside the village and so he obliged. But he didn't like it. That was the reason he was in a bad mood. He was restless, in need of a task where he could fight for his life, for his family, for his village, but there was nothing. Also the previous attack on the hospital made him nervous. Iwagakure tried to threaten them. It was a message Kurotsuchi had sent to Kiri, Kumo and Suna: Stay out of this or we will destroy you like we will destroy Konoha.

Sakura came in view and he smiled. She was a pleasant company. In contrast to her always talking teammate, she was quiet and listened to the people around her. With Sakura at his side he felt better. She was a feel-good person. And her smile was heart-warming.

With every step she came nearer his smile faded. Her normal cheerful aura was gone. She looked sad and tired. He frowned.

What happened since the last time he saw her? Sure, he had seen the hasty look on her face. She hadn't smiled, but he thought it was because she was worried about her friends.

Kankuro made a mental note to find out what was causing her trouble. He wanted the old Sakura back. Maybe his witty jokes would help.

"Hey Kankuro", she greeted him. "Do you have water? I'm so thirsty."

He grabbed his flask and handed it to her. She took a few sips before she gave it back to him.

"Better?"

"Much better. Normally I have enough water with me, but this year the heat in the desert is unbearable."

"It's a normal day for me", he answered cheekily, “you shinobi from Konoha are too weak."

She snorted. "I remember that you whined like a girl when it snowed."

"The cold is something completely different."

She put her arms behind her back and clasped her hands together. "Do you know where we can grab a bite? I'm starving."

"Is that a date?" He grinned at her widely.

"You can call it a date if you want. Lead the way, puppet boy."

"Puppet boy?"

As Sakura giggled he felt relieved. Somewhere underneath he could see the almost eerie Sakura.

* * *

She went to work the next morning and started to get familiar with the other medic ninja. Years ago, in a different life, she had worked at the greenhouses to find an antidote for Kankuro. Sakura knew how happy she was back then. She was useful and was confident. Today it was different. She changed, or better, war changed her attitude.

All the medics greeted her with a smile and showed her around. She noticed the variety of plants that had been added since her last visit. There were many other medical plants that were growing in Kiri, Iwa and Kumo. She also had a present from Tsunade for the green house. Some seeds from plants that were needed to produce antidotes for different poisons.

That was also the purpose of Sakura's mission. She should help prepare and research antidotes and poisons. Also she should teach a handful of shinobi basic healing jutsu to develop a new generation of medic nin. It was the right kind of challenge to keep her head busy. Here and there she would discuss with Gaara the re-building of the hospital and treat the injured that were hit by the explosion a week ago.

The change of location helped, too. She felt energetic and refreshed after an eight hour long sleep. Last time she slept that well was long before the war. She hadn't had a nightmare that night. She interpreted this as a good sign. A new start was all she needed.

“Your name was Takumi?” she asked the man, who was leading her to the last greenhouse.

“Yes, Sakura-san”, he answered. “Do you have any questions?”

She shook her head. “No, I just wanted to thank you. It's a great honour for me to work here. I hope we'll get along.”

“I'm just doing my job. And we're honoured to have the famous student of Tsunade in Suna. We surely need your help.”

“Then let's start”, she retorted and tied her hair together. “First I need all medical records and lists about the plants that are growing here.”

“Hai!”

* * *

“Still no news from Temari?” Kankuro asked Gaara as he entered his office. “Should we send reinforcements?”

“Shikamaru is with her. You don't need to worry.” The Kazekage didn't bother to look up from his papers on the desk. “Is there something else, Kankuro?”

Kankuro sighed and leaned against a wall. “I need a mission, Gaara. Outside of Suna. I'm going mad inside the village. Let me investigate or give me an escort mission. I don't mind if it's easy.”

“You've a mission”, Gaara answered and shuffled through his papers. “You're responsible for Sakura.”

“She can take care of herself. She's a grown up woman.” He raised an eyebrow even if his brother couldn't see it.

Finally Gaara looked at him. “The Hokage sent Sakura to us because she's worried about her. She told me that Sakura has problems with adapting after the war. Therefore she hopes helping us can give her some peace of mind.”

Kankuro was startled. So he was right with his assumptions. Sakura had changed. Since war all have changed. He still was shocked about the fact how easily he had gone back to his normal routine, while people around him have problems to get over it. Perhaps it was his personality or the fact he had to grow up faster than anybody after all the drama in his family, but he felt like before.

Yes, it hurt him that he wasn't fast enough to rescue his comrades. He felt like a failure because he could've been faster to prevent Shikamaru from getting wounded. He never blamed him though, and Temari was more than grateful that he had done all in his might. However, it was his fault.

“Does Sakura know?” He crossed his arms and leaned into Gaara's direction.

“I didn't ask,'' Gaara said and opened a scroll. “But you can ask her when you take her to dinner.”

“I'll for sure.” He pushed himself away from the wall. “But I still want to go outside the borders of Suna.”

“Make sure Sakura is okay, and I'll see what I can do for you.”

Kankuro left the room and nodded at his brother. He sure would help Sakura. He owed her several favours because she saved him two times. He would try.

* * *

The night settled without her noticing it. She was left alone some hours ago but she wanted to continue. Sakura wanted to make a list with all the poisons and antidotes she knew and compare them with the lists of Suna. It was work for days, but she felt so happy being busy with this task, she didn't want it to stop.

For hours the only sounds surrounding her were the buzz of the lamps and the scratching of paper. Therefore she recognized the steps approaching the greenhouse the second they came nearer. She was sure that everybody had left the building. That was odd. She took a kunai from her bag and placed herself near the door. She hid behind a large plant. Her heart was pounding. There was no chakra-signature and that made her curious.

The door was pushed open and she jumped at the intruder. It was his own luck, she didn't hit him with the kunai. Kankuro dodged her attack by squatting down. Out of balance she almost fell, but she was rescued by his chakra threads.

“Are you out of your mind?” Kankuro screamed at her angrily the moment he released her and she stood straight again. “Why did you want to attack me with a kunai?”

“You masked your chakra”, she answered loudly. “How should I know it's you, baka!”

Her hands were trembling, and she was out of breath. Almost she had hurt him. She just reacted as she was trained from an early age. She swallowed hard as the kunai dropped from her hands.

Kankuro's angry face disappeared and he took a step in her direction. He looked concerned. Obviously her fear was visible.

“Is everything okay, Sakura?” He wanted to grab one of her hands. She took a step backwards. The last thing she wanted now was being touched or comforted.

“Don't touch me”, she hissed.

“I'm sorry. I didn't want to scare you”, he gave her a crooked smile. “But I was worried because you weren't in your room yet. It's pitch black outside and you're not familiar with Suna.”

She held her hand in front of her chest and exhaled. Her shoulders were tense from all the fear of a possible attack. She wasn't angry at Kankuro.

“Why do you mask your chakra?”

“I do this unconsciously”, he answered and bowed down to take her kunai from the ground. “My chakra-control had developed over the years and to keep my high level I just do this without thinking.”

“That's amazing.”

It really was amazing. She knew that Kankuro had excellent chakra-control. His jutsu was based on concentrating and manipulating chakra to form thread for his puppets. She never had the chance to read about this kind of jutsu, but she assumed it was similar using the chakra scalpel with a finer point in directing it into the fingertips. And constantly masking your own chakra was exhausting.

“It's just a trick”, he said and shrugged. “Also I'm sure you could do the same if you want. Being a medic ninja means you have outstanding chakra control yourself.”

“I can't,” Sakura said and pointed to her forehead. “Because of my Byakugō.”

He widened his eyes. “How does it work?”

“In short I accumulate chakra and store it within this seal. Therefore I can activate the jutsu and heal myself in seconds on the battlefield.”

He whistled. “You call me amazing and you can do that? You've many secrets, Sakura.”

She blushed and wanted to say something. Suddenly her stomach rumbled. Instantly Kankuro started laughing.

“We can discuss this further during dinner, if you're interested.” He handed her the kunai.

“Do you have a place where we can eat Ramen?”

“I thought only Naruto is obsessed with Ramen.”

“You become used to it after so many years. It's my treat today.”

He snorted. “I'll never let a woman pay for her meals. Besides, you're a guest in Suna.”

Sakura rolled her eyes but agreed. “And for the record: I didn't call you amazing. I just called your skills amazing.”

“I take every compliment I get”, he said and turned around. “Also I know that I'm amazing, so I don't need your approval.”

* * *

Over the course of the next days Kankuro got antsy. Temari's reports from her investigation didn't sooth his concerns regarding Iwa. Kurotsuchi was more dangerous than he initially had thought. He had read the report by Karui again. She had written with an angry voice in her letter. They had attacked a school in Kumo. A place where the kids should be safe.

It was late at night as he was sitting in his room, thinking about the lingering dangers of the world and mended his puppets. He regularly did this in the morning but his whole schedule was upside down since Sakura arrived in Suna. She was an early riser and went to work at six in the morning. Therefore he had shifted his normal routine to fit into hers. After all Gaara had made clear he was responsible for her well-being.

He ate breakfast with her and accompanied her to the greenhouses or the hospital. At noon he would check if she wanted to grab lunch. The times he was busy with other duties he brought her a bento because she tended to forget to eat. One evening she had cooked dinner for him and Gaara. It had tasted wonderful and reminded him of times Temari was still home.

He was surprised how good it felt to have her around. He admired her determination although she wasn't the same person. She was quieter and a smile was hardly seen on her face. She didn't want to talk about her problems. He had tried several times to date and was usually greeted with a cold shoulder.  
He greased the last hinge on Karasu and put the oil away. A short glance on his clock showed him it was already two in the morning. He groaned. That gonna be a short night. He wanted to store away the puppets in his scrolls as all the sudden a loud scream echoed through the halls. It belonged to a woman.

Sakura was covered in sweat as she woke up screaming from her nightmare. She had thrown her covers away and stood at the window. The tears stung in her eyes. She grabbed the sill hard with her hands. Feeling the texture of the stone brought her back to reality. She knew that nothing could happen to her. That her dream was just a dream.

She exhaled and inhaled deeply to calm her nerves. She concentrated on the flow of air through her lungs. Neji had shown her meditation after she asked for his help. Most times it helped her to go back to sleep.  
"Sakura?"

She turned around as she heard the knock on her door. It was Gaara's gentle voice. Sakura had forgotten she wasn't at home and screaming in the Kazekage villa would alarm them.

A louder knock followed.

"Open the door, Sakura", demanded Kankuro. "Or I will open it."

She made her way across the room and unlocked the door. As she opened it, the faces of Gaara and Kankuro looked at her worried.

"You screamed", Gaara stated.

"It's nothing. Just a nightmare." She wanted to close the door but Kankuro stopped her.

"Are you alright?"

She hated the pity in his eyes. Gaara's face didn't show any emotion, but Sakura knew him well enough; he wanted to see she was alright.

“Just go back to sleep. I can handle it.” Of course they didn't leave her. It would've been too easy. Kankuro gave his brother a look and nodded to him.

“Good night, Sakura.”

The Kazekage disappeared back into the hallway. Kankuro, however, stayed at the door, his hand still hindering her from closing it. She got angry.

“Why can't you just leave me alone!"

“You've cried,” Kankuro said matter-of-factly. “And you screamed like you get murdered. So, I'm staying.”

“I'll punch you”, she threatened him. “And I'm going to enjoy every second of it.”

“Try”, he answered and flicked his finger.

She saw the chakra threads before he could attach them to her. She jumped back into her room. Kankuro seemed to have planned this, because he followed her and closed the door behind him.

“Leave me alone!” she growled now.

_How dared he to do this to her?_

She wanted to be alone. For the last months she had sorted out the whole mess inside with herself. She didn't need a hero to rescue her. She was Haruno Sakura. The most famous medic ninja in the world. This stupid nightmares wouldn't bring her down. She was better than that.

“How long do you want to play this game, Sakura? Pretending you're fine and smiling these fake smiles?” he asked, crossed his arms and leaned against the door. “I don't know you very well but even I can see that you're falling apart.”

Sakura clenched her fists. She really wanted to punch him.

“Since when are you such a caring person, Kankuro? And why does it bother you? You've nothing to do with this?”

Her voice was cold. She would not break down in front of him.

“That's my mission”, he answered slowly. “The Hokage sent you to Suna so we can help you.”

“You...what? Shishou told you to do what?” She bit her lip. All the anger was gone in the fraction of a second. The realisation hit her like a slap in the face.

The people around her were more observingly than she had thought. She wrapped her arms around herself. Her body was shaking. The tears she had held back overwhelming her with such a might she no longer could stand it. She let herself fall on her knees, sobbing and screaming.

And then there was Kankuro holding her in a strong embrace.

She told him everything. Between the sobs she managed to pour her heart out. He held her tightly and rubbed her back.  
Somewhere in between he had helped her to stand up. Now they were lying in her bed. Sakura's head was buried at his chest. The sobbing stopped. The silence that followed made him uneasy.

"Thank you, Kankuro", she whispered.

"What for?" he asked.

"Most men flee the moment they see a woman cry. Except Naruto. He always comforts me."

He gently pushed a streak of hair away from her face. She was such a strong woman but her soul and heart were so broken and battered that it hurt him. Kankuro hoped she would overcome this.

"I've a sister. I can handle tears", he answered.

"Temari never cries. You're lying."

He laughed because of her statement. Truly, most people feared Temari. She was brash and hard on the outside. But he knew her soft side and she showed it to few people.

"I'm sure she will kill me, Sakura. So let's keep this a secret between us."

"I have one condition."

"Spill it."

"I want to pay for dinner the next time."

That caught him off guard and he started laughing. Soon Sakura also laughed.

Finally Sakura went to sleep again. He was about to doze off, so he waited until she breathed deeply before he slowly entangled himself from her. Silently he left her room and closed the door.

He was greeted by Gaara in the kitchen. He took the mug with coffee from his brother and inhaled two sips before speaking.

"She told me what's upsetting her", he explained to Gaara and wrapped his fingers around the mug. He was so tired. It was exhausting to comfort a crying woman.

"The loss of Sasuke", Gaara said lowly and sipped his green tea. "And the appearance of his child."

"How do you know?"

"Naruto told me. He died in her arms. The latter was mentioned in Tsunade's letter."

Kankuro nodded. Sure, she told him. Also that she felt useless and burned out. That her work as a medic didn't fill her with joy. She was full of sorrow. Life had no meaning for her.

"You should get some sleep, Kankuro", Gaara said.

"I'm fine. I'll help you and then go back to Sakura."

"Didn't you want a mission outside the village?" Gaara asked, surprised.

"I can't. Sakura needs me", he simply answered and got up. "I go shower and dress. We meet in the office."

Kankuro knew something had changed between him and Sakura. She became more important to him than he ever thought.

* * *

Sakura got to work the next day, after sleeping almost the whole day after her breakdown. She looked through the microscope, while Takumi grinded some herbs. The smell of garlic filled the room.

She had prepared several common antidotes that could be stored for a few months. In the desert were different deathly scorpions and other poisonous animals, and ever so often the Shinobi and villagers got hurt by them. She had found some shortcuts to make the whole process of mixing and brewing medical remedies faster.

"Sakura-san, do you need more garlic or should I do something else?"

Takumi was a nice and thoughtful guy. He had helped her so much. His quick mind gave her new ideas.

"Could you look after the lavender? I need dried lavender."

"Hai, Sakura-san. Should I grind it?"

She took the microscope slide and placed it beside her. The antidote worked well after changing the ingredients. She had made a change to simplify the process of making the antitoxin. This way medics could mix it faster and increase the survival rate of poisoned people.

"I need it for myself. To ease my headache and I want to make tea to sleep better."

Takumi nodded. "Can I make a suggestion?"

"Oh, please. I would appreciate it."

"With balm mint, hops and valerian the tea does taste better and it has more effect. I can prepare you tea and pills."

"Thanks, that would be nice."

Takumi left here alone. She turned back to her microscope and placed a new slide under the lens. It was nearly eight o'clock and she was sure Kankuro was on his way to catch her. He didn't let her walk alone through the village. He didn't listen to her complaints. He wanted to play the gentleman. She let him be.

She felt his chakra approaching. He learned from his mistakes.

"Hi, Kankuro", she greeted him, her eyes focused on her research under the microscope. "I'm almost ready."

"It doesn't look like you're ready." She heard his smirk. He was right. There were twenty more slides on the table.

"You could help me."

Instead of doing this, he got next to her and touched her shoulder.

"Let's go, Sakura. You worked twelve hours. You need rest."

His touch sent shivers down her spine. It made her swallow hard.

"O-okay", she stuttered and stepped away from him.

Takumi came back from the greenhouses. He carried two small pouches in his hands, also a larger bag. A bundle of lavender was swinging from a belt on his hip.

"I'm done, Sakura-san", he said smiling.

She hurried in his direction.

"Thank you so much, Takumi-san. You can go home now."

"Same time tomorrow?"

She nodded. "Have a nice evening."

"Sleep well, Sakura-san."

"Lavender?" Kankuro asked after Takumi was gone.

"I don't want to take sleeping pills. Therefore I will start with lavender."

"I have a better idea", he said and took her by the hand.

Luckily she didn't protest as he dragged her through Suna to the outskirts of the village. She asked several times where they were going, but he just answered with a shrug and a grin. He didn't want to spoil the surprise because he knew she would like it.

He came to stop abruptly. She puffed angrily and took her hand out of his grip.

"Where are we?"

"Training grounds."

She looked at him and a real, bright smile crossed her face.

"I haven't trained for months."

"So you need a little spar."

He was amused about her joy. He could see how she was filled with anticipation. Then Sakura took out her gloves and slipped them over her hands.

"I'm ready, puppet boy."

"You're sure, little cherry blossom? " With a swift motion of his hands he opened the scrolls and his puppets appeared.

She didn't answer but ran in his direction.

"Shannaro!" she screamed and her fist punched the ground.

He knew her monstrous strength and was prepared. He jumped backwards and let Karasu fly. Today he had changed his puppets. Normally he would fight with Sasori but Sakura was traumatized for a lifetime. He didn't want to trigger more unpleasant memories.

As expected she avoided his puppets. He flicked two of his fingers and Kuroari was behind her. She ducked as the puppet stretched its arms to grab her. His attention got back to Karasu. He wanted to trap her into a corner, so he could close her inside Sanshōuo which was hurried underneath the sand.

Sakura was not a normal kunoichi. Her teacher was one of the legendary Sannin. She was intelligent and knew how to fight. Therefore she avoided all of his attempts to catch her with his puppets. But he was sure he would succeed.

Suddenly Karasu fell to the ground. He was surprised. He wanted to pull the puppet back, but he couldn't. The Chakra threads were cut.

"You did not!" he growled and wanted to attach the threads to his puppets again. Sakura grabbed Karasu and threw it to the other side of the training ground. That was far out of reach. She grinned at him.

"Is this your first time?" She asked and ran near him.

"The last time I was twelve," he retorted and started running. "How did you do this?"

"Chakra scalpel," she answered grinning.

Under no circumstances he wanted her to get near him. He wasn't good with Tajutsu. He could defend himself. He was able to dodge some blows. If it wasn't Sakura. She could crush him with a fingertip.

She was fast, really fast. There was just an arm length between them. He infused chakra to his fingertips and locked the jew formed chakra threads on Sakura. Shortly after she crashed with her back at a wall. He took out a kunai, hurried after her and pinned her with his whole body.

She was like him out of breath. He glared into her eyes, fully aware of their closeness. Her chest pressed against his own.

"I win," he said hoarsely.

Her face was so close he could not only see the moon but also the stars reflecting in her green eyes. It was a nice colour. She smiled at him.

"I don't think so."

She pushed him with her hand away and he fell to the ground. Sakura took the Kunai out of his hands, climbed onto him and held the knife at his throat.

"I win."

They walked silently back to the Kazekage Villa. Kankuro wasn't in the mood for talking. Sakura hummed happily beside him.

He was confused. His heart and mind were battling. First he had thought that he just was amazed by her skills. He acknowledged her technique. But as he was lying on the ground some other pictures flooded his mind. How he would kiss and undress her. His tongue mapping her body.

"Good night, Kankuro."

He didn't recognize they already were inside the building.

"Night."

He waited until he heard her door close before he slammed a fist to the wall. He called himself an idiot.

"Damn", he squeezed out.

Kankuro didn't know much about love, but what he felt weren't just friendly feelings. He was falling for Sakura.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was one of the chapters I've written long before the others. I had this imagine in my mind that Kankuro suddenly realised how much Sakura means to him in the middle of all this chaos.
> 
> (An additional author's note: Like all of the song titles I use for this story, I did some research on the song. Even if the lyrics are weird and seem to be totally random, it is in fact a lovesong. It underlines the mood I wanted to create in this chapter. And I like the image of a heart-shaped box.)


	12. The Colour of Snow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Polarkreis 18 - "The Colour of Snow"
> 
> TW/CW: Mention of torture and rape
> 
> (If you don't want to read this skip the last part after Neji's POV)

He had left Sunagakure with a bad feeling and hoped nothing would happen during his absence. He trusted Baki to handle the important things during his stay in the Land of Iron and that Iwagakure hadn't planned another ambush. The clay they had found after the explosion was secured in a scroll. He wanted answers from Kurotsuchi. Why she wanted to disrupt the new forming peace.

They took the direct route through Hi no Kuni and would meet the Hokage, his advisors and Temari on the borders. Normally he wasn't the type for smalltalk during their trips, but it was quite unusual Kankuro didn't say a word after they had left their village. Gaara was sure he knew the cause for this strange behaviour.

He had watched his brother interacting with Sakura. Kankuro seemed to care a lot about her. Since that one night he had stayed by her side, Kankuro gave Sakura long stares during breakfast and had a tiny smile in the corners of his mouth. He seemed eager to touch her occasionally, just a hand on her arm or a tap on the shoulder, but so frequently, that Gaara started to notice.

Since he never fully understood this kind of love between a man and a woman, he started to compare what he saw with his sister's behaviour around Shikamaru. The similarities were stunning.

_But should he ask Kankuro?_

Sakura also was heading back to Konoha. Since Tsunade would be out of the village she was needed in their hospital. She had helped them a lot during her stay. Her suggestions for the re-building of the hospital were really helpful. The medics spoke of her in awe and didn't want to let her go. Maybe she could come back after the first meeting of the Shinobi Alliance was over.

"Sakura, I'm very grateful for your help," he addressed her.

She stopped in her tracks and turned around. "I'm happy to help you, Gaara. Suna is such a nice place."

"You can stay longer next time, if you like."

She didn't smile but beamed at him.

"Of course. We have to talk to shishou first, but there's so many things I would love to research in your greenhouses."

Gaara couldn't help but give her a small smile. He liked Sakura not because she was Naruto's friend. She was a pleasant company.

Kankuro followed with interest the conversation his brother had with Sakura. He didn't participate because he didn't trust his voice. He wanted her to stay in Suna more than anything else, and feared it at the same time.

Her smile was the last thing he thought of before sleep caught him and was the first picture in his mind when he woke up. Kankuro didn't know what to do. He had kissed various women in his life. If he told them he was a shinobi and fought in the last great war, they believed him in an instant, sometimes it led to an hour or two in a cheap hotel room.

He knew how to treat a woman the right way and wouldn't play games with them; he feared the wrath of his sister. She once stumbled into his room when he was having fun with a girl. Temari made the girl flee and then talked with him for hours; repeating over and over again she would castrate him, if she ever found out, her brother broke a girl's heart.

They crossed the final border to the Land of Fire and the shade of trees was much nicer than the heat of the desert. He loved living in his homeland. The wild winds of the sand-storms, the always changing dunes and the challenging temperatures at day and night.

But he also could see the beauty in the greens of the trees, the rainy days and the more welcoming climate in Konoha. Kankuro would never leave Suna, but he admired that Sakura was such a strong person, knowing she had grown up in a much more friendlier terrain.

"We should take a break," Sakura suggested. "Lady Tsunade and the others should be here in a few hours. We can rest a while."

"That sounds like a good idea," Kankuro agreed and put down his scrolls under one big tree. "We could cook something. Gaara's soup is delicious."

His brother shook his head. "I'm not hungry."

"We all need something to eat. You haven't eaten the whole day, Gaara. As a medic I order you to eat."

Kankuro laughed out loud at Gaara's expression. Until now only Temari had talked to him like this. He was still giggling when his brother unpacked a pot and a pan to cook.

* * *

Omoi got on her nerves seconds after they left Kumo. Since the explosion she was furious. She trained more and harder than before, ready to fight Kurotsuchi, punching some sense into her. All the diplomatic talk hadn't done any good. The talk hadn't helped to put the issue of war off the table. She would end this.

Karui had visited the little girl named Kairi in the hospital. Her leg was broken at several places and she had a lot of bruises and scratches. She had brought her chocolate and a stuffed octopus. The girl was also angry and sad. She didn't understand why people did things like this. But she wanted to become a ninja and learn to do outstanding jutsu, showing she is strong.

They already had reached the borders of the Land of Iron and she heard the snow making noises under her shoes. She wanted to reach their accommodation as soon as possible. Darui didn't let them rest during their journey. After four hours of sleep he woke them and they continued their traveling. She was exhausted and upset.

Karui had thought about Chouji lately. He was so present in her mind and her heart, she was totally confused by her feelings. She hadn't experienced this ever in her life before. She had had a crush on a boy a long time ago, but it was different with Chouji. He had shown how much he cared for his village and his friends. She had worked with him for months. He even had met her mother. Karui didn't know if he recopiated her feelings, but she would find out. Surely Shikamaru accompanied the Hokage. She could ask him.

The night was slowly falling. The snow still blinded her eyes. She was grateful there wasn't a snow storm. The last time it was different. It was shortly after the war. Mifune had gathered them to talk about the future.

_She hadn't slept very well last night. Her eyes felt heavy and were rimmed red, because she had fallen asleep crying. They had buried A a week ago. The whole village was grieving the loss of their Kage. It was Darui's first meeting as their new leader. Cee would handle everything while they were in Tetsu no Kuni._

_She placed herself behind the banner with the Kanji for "Lightning" and looked to her left and her right. Shikamaru was looking pale and so different with his eye patch. Karui had heard that he had been hurt at his right eye. Even if Temari was sitting on her side she saw how close they were sitting together, holding hands. The other person at Shikamaru's side was Naruto. He looked more serious than before the war._

_The air was thick and buzzing. Kurotsuchi had held a long speech about friendship and the Shinobi Alliance, peace and bonds. She didn't feel any hope. It was too much._

The memory faded and she shook her head. She hoped that this Kurotsuchi from the past was still hidden under all the sadness and sorrow. That it wasn't too late for a change.

* * *

He held the boy with shaking hands and still unsure if he was doing it right. He didn't have any experience with babies or children at all. Nobody trusted him enough to hold such a tiny human. Naruto couldn't blame them. Mirai almost fell out of his hands the time he had held her. It was the combined powers of Chouji and Shikamaru that prevented the worst.

But holding Sasuke's child was different. He looked in the face of Kouki, who had fallen asleep again. He put a streak of the black hair aside that almost reached his eyes. Naruto didn't know how Sasuke had looked like as a baby but imaging that he once was such a sweet boy hurt him so much.

He had promised to protect him. It was the child of his best friend, his teammate. He would do anything to ensure a happy future for him. He should grow up with the security to be loved, smile and laugh the whole day.

"You should go home," Karin said tiredly from her bed. "You haven't left the hospital for days, Naruto."

He looked up from Kouki's face to his mother. She looked better now. So much healthier. Soon she could leave the hospital and would get an apartment in the same building he lived in. Naruto wanted to help her, not only because she was the mother of Sasuke's child, but she needed someone she could trust.

Orochimaru hadn't shown himself until now. Karin had said maybe Suigetsu and Juugo would look out for her. They had helped her to hide from him.

"It's okay, Karin. I don't need so much sleep," he answered and put Kouki in his bed. "Don't worry about me."

Karin blinked. She seemed really tired.

"I never understood why Sasuke wanted to go back to Konoha. He didn't like it when Suigetsu talked bad about you guys." She yawned. "But now I realise why. You all have such a warm aura around you. Whole Konoha feels so welcoming. Therefore I came here. I knew you would help me."

Hearing her talk about Sasuke still felt like a punch in the guts. She also was a former teammate of Sasuke. She knew things about Sasuke after he had left Konoha. He had trusted her enough to fight side by side with her. Naruto knew how picky Sasuke had been with the people he trusted. So he also tried to trust Karin. That she spoke the truth.

"Sleep a bit," Naruto said and smiled at her. "You need to be strong for your little boy."

Karin closed her eyes and exhaled deeply. Naruto pulled her blanket higher and left the room. He needed to search for Sakura. They needed a plan to get Kakashi out of Amegakure. He was fed up with losing his teammates.

* * *

Kiba had invited her for lunch and since she had no better excuse she met him in front of her favourite restaurant. It had been twelve days since the last time she had drunk alcohol. She hadn't told anyone because she could do it alone. They had seen her weak and crying all the time since the end of the war. Wanted to mend her like a broken machine. Ino was better than this. She was stronger. She was a Yamanaka and could fight her way out of this misery.

Still she was nervous to see Kiba. Their last time alone was in the Land of Rivers. The kiss he had put on her head - she wasn't sure if she had imagined it. Kiba was a great guy, if he didn't talk with his dog, than he looked so stupid; but it was kind of cute. He had been so nice to her and helped her to forget her loneliness.

She felt a bit cold even if it was summer. She couldn't believe time had passed by this fast. It seemed like yesterday they headed to war, their friends and family, and since she lost hope that this nightmare would end.

But she couldn't hide any longer. She needed to face her responsibilities. Start to live again.

Kiba turned around the next street corner and wasn't alone. Chouji was with him and they seemed in a good mood. The men were laughing. Ino smiled when they came nearer. She hoped one day she could laugh like this again. Feel the joy of being alive.

"Hey, boys," she greeted them. "Didn't think Chouji would join, too."

"And Sakura," Kiba added. "We met her on our way. She just finished work."

"Where's Akamaru?"

"Home with my sister. She needs to get rid of his fleas."

Ino still had the smile plastered on her face. She had avoided Sakura on purpose, because like her, she couldn't process that Sasuke had left behind a child. They shared the same pain and Ino wasn't ready for this. She had just stopped drinking. That was too much emotional pressure.

"Let's go inside, Ino," Chouji suggested. "Then we don't need to wait so long for the food."

That cheered her up for a fraction and she chuckled.

"Okay, we don't want you to starve, Chouji."

Kiba watched Ino closely during their meal. She hadn't eaten much, and stared into her lap with tired eyes. For the first time in months he didn't trace alcohol on her. Maybe that was the reason she looked like shit.

"So Chouji, you still need to tell us how it is in Kumo. Is it very different from living here?" Sakura asked when she put a piece of fish into her mouth.

"I missed you guys a lot, but it was great working with the people in Kumo. Karui is a great company."

The smile that flicked over his face, made Kiba interested. He had never heard him talk this much and above all not about a girl. Normally Ino would've asked a lot of questions about this Karui, because she couldn't live without having any information about the lives of her friends. But Ino just listened like she was an outsider.

"So you have already invited her for a date?" Kiba wanted to know and took a sip from his glass.

Chouji's cheeks got a bit redder than before. This guy was totally in love with Karui and it made Kiba happy for his friend. After he had lost his arm in war, and he had to help Shikamaru and Ino with their grieve, he deserved the good things in life. A great woman to bring him joy.

"I don't know if she likes me this way."

"You should ask her," Sakura encouraged him. "Don't you think so too Ino?"

Ino again had looked into her lap with great interest. She snapped her head up and her face showed confusion. She hadn't listened if Kiba had to guess.

"Yes, Sakura is right," Kiba helped her. "Chouji should Karui on a date."

Ino put a hand on Chouji's arm and shortly squeezed it. "You should do everything that makes you happy." The sad expression on her face didn't match her words. She sapped the napkin on her mouth and stood up. "I need to go. My mother needs me in the flower shop."

* * *

The snow and the cold air was refreshing. He didn't mind the weather like Kankuro did. He was complaining every five meters and only shut up when Temari threatened to put snow inside his clothes. Now he mumbled under his breath and got on Shikamaru's nerves.

He considered throwing him inside the snow because it was still a three hour walk until they reached the city where the first meeting of the Shinobi Alliance would take place. He wanted to lay down on his bed - maybe after having sex with Temari - and sleep more than five hours at night. This mission already was so troublesome without all the additional complications in Konoha.

Gaara and Lady Tsunade walked ahead and discussed their approach towards Kurotsuchi. There had been a video conference beforehand. Darui and Mei had agreed to talk Kurotsuchi out of her revenge. That they would not agree to a death penalty for the Hokage wasn't the answer and war not an option.

At least his headache and the pain in his eye were gone for good. Sakura had treated his inflammation. He felt immediately better. Because he had relied on the morphine this long he had to live with the withdrawal symptoms of the drug for some time.

The headache he had now, however, wasn't from his eye or the after-effects of the morphine, but Kankuro's complaints about the cold. He had to end this.

"Could you stop whining like a baby for a second, Kankuro?" he asked and tried to sound as annoyed as he felt.

"I'm not the crybaby," Kankuro responded with a mocking voice.

"Stop bothering him," Temari said from behind them. "Or I will throw you into the next pile of snow."

_He really loved that woman._

"You don't dare to do this," Kankuro answered and turned his head into his sister's direction.

Shikamaru didn't expect her to be already prepared, because Kankuro got hit by a snowball directly in the face. Temari laughed and fled towards the trees.

"TEMARI!" he yelled and ran after her. He tried to catch her with his chakra-threads but she avoided them with quick jumps out of his reach. The two Kage weren't amused about the break. Gaara was shaking his head while Tsunade sighed. Shizune on the other hand laughed.

Everything seemed fine until Temari slipped on an icy spot in the snow. She fell with her back first towards the ground and hit her head at a tree.

Shikamaru started running as she didn't stand up within seconds and saw her lifeless limbs.

* * *

He thought he would find Ino in the flower shop but was greeted by her mother. After he had talked with her while she put together bouquets for the graves of his friends, he headed to the cemetery. The sun was setting for the evening that looked so beautiful it almost hurt him.

He had been here the last time before he went to Kumo. First he put some flowers on Asuma's gravestone knowing it hurt the most. As soon as he read the name of his sensei the tears started falling. He still had the pictures of that day in his head, the feeling of despair lingering through his body as he remembered how Asuma had lost his life. He put down the flowers on the stone and went ahead to the next grave.

It took some time to visit all the graves until he walked where they had erected stones for Shikaku and Inoichi. Chouji still knew how hard it had been to comfort his friends. Shikamaru had started smoking again and did not let go of this habit since then. Ino had started to drink and fell deeper into the abyss of grieving.

He noticed that she was kneeling in front of her father's stone as he approached that part of the cemetery. She slightly touched the stone, caressing it. Chouji swallowed hard.

"Did you look for me, Chouji?"

She didn't turn around.

"I hoped to find you at the flower shop."

"There wasn't much to do."

Obviously she didn't want company. So he turned around, but was stopped by her grabbing his hand.

"I need help, Chouji," she said with a pleading voice. "Would you help me?"

He pulled her up into an embrace. She didn't cry but sighed loudly. Chouji wanted her so hard to be happy again.

"I think you need therapy, Ino," he responded carefully. "You started to drink. That's not like you."

"I stopped," she answered dully on his chest. "I needed to stop. But I want to go home and empty a bottle of wine so urgent right now."

Chouji rubbed her back. "You stay with me tonight. Mum cooks your favourite curry today."

They walked to his home in silence. His arm around her shoulder to show her she could rely on him every time she needed him.

* * *

"You need to go now," Temari said to her brothers, who had gathered around her bed with Shikamaru. After Tsunade had healed her head wound and she gained consciousness again, she was greeted by worried looks.

Kankuro had carried her the whole way to their accommodation and since then hovered over her like a cat over her kitten. Normally this was Shikamaru's part, but he didn't say anything until now. Even Gaara had expressed his relief that she was fine.

"I'm so sorry, Tem," Kankuro repeated again and that made her sigh.

"Did you push me so I hit my head?"

"No."

"Are you responsible for the ice and snow?"

"No."

"See? You don't need to apologize."

"But it was my fault. I should have -"

Gaara put a hand on his mouth and interrupted his never ending flood of words.

"We will go now, Temari. Rest a bit."

She smiled at her baby brother and squeezed his hand. Kankuro leaned down to hug her. As the door closed Shikamaru sat on her bed and embraced her tightly.

"You scared me so much, Tem."

"Nothing happened, Shikamaru. It was just bad luck I slipped."

He let go of her and put a streak of her hair aside. Tsunade had opened her hair and cut it a bit to close her wound properly. She had a concussion and should rest for the day. Tomorrow the first meeting of the Shinobi Alliance would take place and under no circumstances she would drop out of this.

She traced his lips with her fingers. He grabbed her hand and kissed them.

"You are too precious to me. I won't let you get hurt. And I really want to punch Kankuro."

She chuckled. "Kankuro deserves to get punched for behaving like a girl because of the cold."

Shikamaru grinned and kissed her this time on the lips. She would've loved to continue but her head started to hurt again. She pushed him away gently.

"Do you want to sleep?"

"Yeah," she answered and closed her eyes. "It's troublesome to hit your head on a tree." On this remark he chuckled.

He slipped off his shoes and the eyepatch, then snuggled with her under the blanket. She soon fell asleep with his wonderful smell in her nose. With Shikamaru she could feel safe.

He was home.

* * *

Tenten looked down on the plastic stick in her hand. It was the third test today. Yesterday it had been five. She still couldn't believe it. She had been in the hospital this morning. A medic not only tested her blood but showed her via ultrasound that it was real.

 _I'm pregnant_.

She knew that having sex could lead to children but she and Neji had been very careful and used protection; obviously at one occasion it had failed.

It explained at least why she still felt sick after she had left the boat. It must have happened before they headed to Kiri. She hadn't been seasick on their way home. She was with child and the little bean inside of her caused her hormones to take over.

Tenten didn't know what to do or how to tell Neji these shocking news. She knew he wanted children but not now. He was in a constant fight with the elders of his clan. Marrying a girl from outside or even get her pregnant would weaken his position. The seal on his forehead would also be branded inside his kids; like him she didn't want this to happen.

_Did she want kids?_

She was eighteen. A good age to start a family in normal times; not in time when a war was about to break out. She put the stick inside the bin and stood up.

As she looked outside the window she saw two boys chasing each other, laughing and screaming of joy. A girl sat with her friend in front of a store and they played with their puppets.

_Would her child also be this happy?_

Tenten shook her head. She needed to think about this, then she would tell Neji about her pregnancy. She wasn't prepared for such a big step.

A hand came to rest on her belly.

_What should I do?_

* * *

The barrier team had asked for reinforcements because they had a disturbance within Konoha's borders. They had captured two men, and there was a third one; he was unconscious. Because all present shinobi were too inexperienced to make a decision Neji had taken action.

He was within reach and so he just acted. Whatever happened he as a Jounin was responsible for the safety of his village. But most of all he could identify the third man.

As he reached the specific spot he was told by one of the Yamanaka clan, he activated his Byakugan. Neji could see in an almost perfect 360 degree angle. He focused on his surroundings and gasped. This couldn't be. Such a coincidence was impossible.

He slid on his knees through the grass and turned him over. His face was pale. A lot of blood covered his silver grey hair. The mask was gone and showed his dry lips. He was sure there were different body fluids around his mouth and chin. He didn't wear his vest and the rest of his clothes were torn. Hatake Kakashi surely had seen better days.

"Kakashi-sensei? Can you hear me?"

Neji looked at his chakra-network and realised he was under genjutsu. He pressed a palm of his hand on his chest and made the hand sign with the other to release him. Kakashi's eyes fluttered. He squinted.

"No, please," he groaned with a shaky, pleading tone in his voice. "Please let me go."

"It's me, Neji," he said. "You're in Konoha. You're safe, Kakashi."

The man didn't answer and he shut his eyes.

"Contact the Hokage and bring me a medic as soon as possible," he ordered one of the Chuunin. "And show me the two men you captured."

* * *

Sakura had shaking hands when she treated Kakashi. She had gathered the best of the best medics to assist her and even called for Ino. Her friend supported to heal all the broken bones, while she stopped the internal bleedings.

Her sensei already had a lot of scars on his body and there would be added so much more. She was yelling and ordering the medics around, giving short commands to work faster. Sakura didn't know what they had done to him but they had been brutal. She fought back her tears when she turned him around on his belly and saw the bruises of kicks in the area of his kindneys.

 _They have raped him,_ she thought and bit on her lip. _Oh, dear gods, please help me to heal him._

Ino was as focused as her on the task at hand. Sakura had to activate her seal to stop the bleeding faster. She was grateful Kakashi was under narcotics. He had a long recovery time ahead.

Neji had told her he had been under gentjutsu and pleaded they would stop. She was disgusted about the methods they use in Amegakure. He hadn't fight his way out alone. Suigetsu and Juugo brought him back to Konoha. She had to talk to them as soon as she had rescued Kakashi.

The heart monitor started to beep suspiciously.

"We need more blood volume," she ordered a nurse. "And check his blood status."

The skin under her hand, where they obviously hit Kakashi with a whip started to heal. Ino worked on his legs and healed the broken femur at his left side. A nurse dapped the sweat of her forehead.

Kakashi's heart rate went back to normal and Ino stepped back.

"Is there anything else to do, Sakura?"

"We have to pray and wait." She turned to the nurse. "Bring him to the IC and contact the Anbu. We need guards around the room."

As they rolled Kakashi out of the OR she exhaled deeply. She would shower and then stay at his bed. Ino tapped her on the shoulder.

"You did a great job, Forehead."

"You too, Ino-pig."

Hearing her best friend laugh made her heart lighter.


	13. Running Up That Hill

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Kate Bush - "Running Up That Hill"

Tsunade had trusted Neji with the ANBU for the time of her departure. Although he still needed to ask the other higher ups and the clan heads of Konoha to get into action. Kiba waited with him in the meeting room until they decided on a plan.

While Naruto and Sakura stayed in the hospital, Ino was interrogating the two men that had brought Kakashi back to them. Since they were Orochimaru's subordinates at some point they couldn't walk around freely; it didn't matter that Karin knew them, that was even a proof they had to watch every step of each of them. Such a coincidence made him curious and Kiba was even more worried about Ino.

He knew she had helped Sakura with treating Kakashi. After this Ino now searched in the minds of those who were Sasuke’s teammates after he abandoned his home. That was too much for her to handle in her unstable condition. He wasn’t as close to Ino and maybe would never be as Sakura, Chouji and Shikamaru, but he was so worried.

Kiba started to face the reality that Ino may like him, but not the same way he wanted her to reciprocate his feelings.

This was after all a bitter pill to swallow and he shouldn’t focus on Ino so much. Konoha was in great danger and he was with all of his friends responsible to keep it safe, especially in times when the Hokage was absent. But he couldn’t stop caring for her.

It was already late when Akimichi Chouza finally re-entered the room.

“You may contact Lady Tsunade immediately,” he announced.

“Thanks a lot, Chouza-sama,” Neji thanked him and stood up. “Will you come along, Kiba?”

He nodded and followed Neji out of the room.

* * *

“Are you sure you want to do this, Yamanaka?”

It was peculiar that Ibiki held her back before they went into the room to interrogate their captives.

“Of course, Morino-sama. Why shouldn’t I do this? It is my job after all.”

His hand still was on her shoulder, tightly, hindering her to move. She never was scared of Morino Ibiki. But the look he shared with her, the raised eyebrows, and that cold aura surrounding him, made her shudder in this situation.

He was an expert at his field and could read a thought without looking into people’s minds. Just a movement of a finger, the slightest sign of discomfort and he would eat your soul alive. Ino was prepared to argue with him. He could take over. He was her senior and she still in training.

"You're personally involved," he answered her question. "But I trust your assessment." His hand left her shoulder and she advanced forward to the room.

Ino was prepared to give her best. She could make a cut between her feelings and those memories she would see. The last months she had trained so hard to prove to Ibiki she has the right to work at the T&I.

This was her chance to show she was the true heir of her clan.

* * *

Calling Tsunade furious would have been an understatement. Her voice was full of anger and her whole body ready to punch something. They had quickly made all the adjustments for a video call and Kiba thought this had been a bad idea. Shikamaru, who sat on her side, moved away from her with a scared look on his face. Kiba had to hold back the laughter. He had so many women in his life, who constantly made him trouble. He didn't want to change places with him.

“Kakashi had been tortured in Amegakure and was rescued by two of Orochimaru's former subordinates,” Neji repeated with a firm voice. “Sakura and Ino treated him, but his condition still is life-threatening.”

“Did they say why they helped Kakashi?” Shikamaru asked as Tsunade threw a book in the room aside and jumped out of her chair to order Shizune to bring the sake.

“They're still being asked by Ino and Ibiki. So we don't know yet,” Kiba said.

Shikamaru frowned his forehead and sighed. “Okay. Just keep us updated. We will contact you again when we have some orders for you.”

“Did Amegakure come to the Land of Iron?”

Kiba wasn't surprised that Neji asked such a question. He wanted to have full control over situations and was a leader. He planned ahead. He felt responsible for Konoha and wanted to weigh the options. If a new complication started to rise on the horizon Neji wanted to be ready.

Shikamaru waited until Tsunade - now mumbling angry - left the room. He sighed as she was gone.

“No,” Shikamaru said. “We still wait for some participants. Mifune says he doesn't want to jump to assumptions.”

Neji nodded and crossed his arms. “But you don't think they won't show up.”

That statement made Shikamaru grin.

“That's why I still think you deserve to be a Jounin, Neji,” he stated.

All three men laughed. It was a constant joke between them, that Neji had been made Jounin before Shikamaru. He had been, like Sakura, promoted shortly after the war.

Kiba thought he should maybe try to rise higher in the ranks. This way he could get missions that really mattered for the protection of Konoha. But first he needed to make sure his friends were okay, especially Ino. He was such a hypocrite thinking he could get rid of his yearning for Ino thus easily.

“Take care, Shikamaru.”

“Of course,” he responded and yawned. “Keep Konoha safe.”

“You can count on us.”

The screen turned black.

* * *

Ino almost threw up. The pictures, the memories of Suigetsu were full of blood-lust and cruelty. He loved to kill and shed blood and her mind couldn't handle all these unfamiliar emotions. She was shaking when she stepped back and looked down at the grinning man.

“I'm really sad you don't appreciate how willingly I let you look into my head,” he commented and grinned wider.

“Stop it, Suigetsu,” Juugo, who sat beside him, scolded him. “I apologize for my friend. He doesn't know when to stop.”

“We didn't even get a meal. Where's the hospitality Sasuke talked about? He always said you were so soft.”

She raised her hand and hit Suigetsu's cheek with full force. He looked at her with wide eyes.

“Don't you dare to talk about Sasuke,” she hissed and leaned closer to his face. “I'm a Yamanaka. I can destroy your mind with my jutsu. If you don't cooperate and play according to my rules, you will beg for forgiveness.”

Suigetsu found back to his sarcastic self in seconds. “Oh, that's going to be fun, sweetheart.”

“Morino-sama, I need time alone with the prisoner. Take the other man outside.” Ibiki didn't say a word but followed her words. “Let's play a game, Suigetsu.”

Kiba didn't like the facility of the Torture and Interrogation force. It was cold and lifeless inside the halls and rooms. He knew what they were doing here. Maybe they didn't use the same methods as in Amegakure but being tortured by Morino Ibiki wasn't a pleasant thought. They all had to learn about the different departments of Konoha in the academy and he soon decided he didn't want to be in such a position.

Neji had been here much more often than he. His missions often require to bring back people for interrogations, so Kiba followed him deeper inside the building, hoping he would not hear or smell something that made him even more uncomfortable.

“Do we have to walk much longer?” he asked at some point when they hadn't left a hallway for ten minutes.

“Are you scared?” Neji asked with a smirk.

“More bored. It was a long day and I want to go home to take Akamaru for a walk.”

“How does the hierarchy inside your clan work?” Neji asked all of the sudden and startled him with this question.

“What do you mean?”

Neji shot him a short glance.

“Do you have elders, who decide every step you take? Who will take over as clan head? Are there certain rules?” He blurted out. “I'm just curious.”

Kiba knew that it was difficult for Neji after the death of his uncle and Hinata. His clan was without a leader and they didn't accept him. He had seen first hand that the Hyuuga clan was cruel and unforgiving. Hinata had cried so many times before they had met for training. Even now he wanted to kick their asses for behaving this way.

“First of all we behave like humans,” he said without thinking. The next second Neji pressed him with force into the next wall, face first.

“I just asked you simple questions, Inzuka,” he said close to his ear. “I know that my clan is different from yours. That we are more traditional and have strict rules, but that doesn't give you the permission to drop such a statement.”

He let go of him and Kiba glared angrily in his direction. Kiba realised with a pang inside his mind, that Neji could kill him without much effort. Angering him was a bad idea, but if not him, who should tell Neji, that the Hyuuga clan needed a lot of work to compensate for the things they had done in the past?

Hinata was dead and she would never see the change in her clan. He was so angry about that fact he pushed his fear aside. Neji must know.

“Did you ever think about Hinata? That it was too much for her?” he yelled at him ready to punch Neji. “She may have forgiven you but I still remember how you tried to kill her in the Chuunin exams!”

The fist hit him with precision on his nose. It cracked and blood was dripping in seconds. His hands automatically covered his nose. A few blots of blood landed on Neji’s clothes. A sharp pain let his eyes fill with tears.

_Why had it to be his nose?_

“You broke my nose,” he exclaimed, now more angry than before.

“Don’t play victim,” Neji said coldly. “You deserved it.”

Kiba swallowed the next words that almost fell from his tongue because Neji had not only activated his Byakugan and the veins on his head looked scary, the whole expression shifted to such a level of hatred he didn’t want him to press further.

“Maybe I deserved it,” he answered and fiddled a cloth out of his bag to stop the blood. “But I’m still right. You tried to kill your cousin, your family.”

Neji punched the wall behind Kiba and it shook the hallway they were standing in. Both men looked at each other challenging the other with their looks. The tension was palpable. He had left Akamaru outside, he wasn’t allowed inside the building. By this time his ninken already would have bitten Neji in the leg. Akamaru didn’t like that Kiba got hurt.

“I know you’re right, Kiba,” Neji finally spat out. “And I regret it. But that doesn’t help us now. Hinata is dead and we have to move on.

He turned away and started walking the hallway straight ahead.

Kiba wasn’t sure, but he thought he had seen a hint of tears in Neji’s eyes. He had never seen Neji cry. He clearly remembered his talk with Sakura. He started to worry about his friend.

* * *

She was astonished Suigetsu could stand against her jutsu. He was so full of confidence and biting remarks, still that smile on his face. Ino wanted to whip this grin from his face, throw him around the room and yell at him. But that didn’t work with him.

Since she worked at the T & I for quite some time, she knew how her colleagues worked, but she wanted to establish her own technique, her trademark. Until this point, until Suigetsu challenged her she didn’t quite understand why the work here fulfilled so many shinobi; she understood now.

Ino was angry. She hated that this war had already started without facing the enemy on a battlefield. Iwagakure had attacked three Hidden Villages and had turned their longtime allies against them. Amegakure had tortured one of their best shinobi, the sensei of her best friend. She was so fed up.

She still rummaged through Suigetsu's head and stumbled across a memory.

_“I want you to go to Konoha if I ever die,” Sasuke said in front of a campfire, sharpening his kunai. “All of you. Orochimaru will never leave you alone. But you’re safe inside those walls.”_

_Karin adjusted her glasses and looked at him with a straight face._

_“Why should we?” Suigetsu asked and showed his teeth. “He will find us either way.”_

_Sasuke nodded in Juugo’s direction. “Because of him. Juugo is in the danger of getting hurt. I know you seeked help from Orochimaru, but in Konoha there’s someone who can truly help you.”_

_“Do you mean Senju Tsunade?” asked Karin, curiously and stirred the soup in the pot above the fire._

_“No.” Sasuke shook his head, dropped his kunai in the grass beneath him. “I mean Haruno Sakura. She’s a better medic.”_

_“I still don’t get why you’re so attached to that village and the people.”_

_Sasuke didn’t comment on these words, just shook his head again and a smile raised in the corner of his mouth. Karin watched him closely._

Ino couldn’t stop the sob that escaped her throat as she was back in her own mind again. She hadn’t expected this. She stumbled backwards, away from Suigetsu. It was the first time he didn’t look satisfied. He raised his eyebrows as she fought against her feelings.

She didn’t realise that the door was opened until someone put a hand on her shoulder and called her name. Ibiki shoved her aside and pushed her outside the room. She was pulled into a tight embrace.

Whatever happened in the interrogation room between Ino and Suigetsu Kiba would never know. He had to carry a crying Ino, while Morino Ibiki took over. Curious looks accompanied them as he walked to the next break room, where he prepared some tea for Ino.

She stared at the wall when he handed her the cup and sat beside her. He didn’t want to see her this upset again. Every time it hurt even more. She had cried so many tears in his presence. Why couldn’t she just start living again? He wanted to see her smile.

The short moments he had heard her laugh or see the hint of a grin weren’t enough. She should find her old self, be full of hope again, show into the future with new plans. Kiba knew it took some time and effort. With the war lingering through the world he himself wasn’t convinced that he had a bright, peaceful future ahead.

They drank their tea in nervous silence. He didn't want to pressure her to talk.

"Why don't you ask me, what happened?"

He looked at her face, trying not to follow the traces of exhaustion around her eyes and the greyish skin. Ino had this skin that bruises easily with small veins shimmering underneath the surface. She looked even more fragile than usual.

"I think you already know that I'm here if you want to talk. I don't push you to open up to me. It had done no good in the past."

This was so unbearable true Ino's pupils widened a fraction and went back to their normal size.

"I saw something in Suigetsu's memories that shocked me." She grabbed her skirt with her hands."I don't want to think about it ever again. But I have to tell Sakura."

Kiba took one of Ino's hands in his. It was so cold. He should take her out of this depressing place. He was caught by surprise when Ino buried her head at his chest and hugged him.

He didn't complain. If Ino sought comfort he was willing to follow her wish; after all it was exactly what he wanted. She should feel safe around him. Ino wasn't the person she used to be, also he had promised Shikamaru he would help Ino.

He hoped she didn't recognize how fast his heart was beating as she leaned against him. Kiba was bad at hiding the joy he felt when she all of the sudden touched his face. He gulped as her face came nearer.

"Kiba, you're such a nice guy. Beneath all this dumb jokes you have your heart on the right place."

She smiled - oh, kami this smile made him melt - and then let go of his cheek, her head again resting at the place where his heart beat wildly because of their closeness.

"No problem, Ino. But don't tell anyone. I think I can't handle more beautiful women in my fan club."

He heard and felt her snort. "Your secret is safe with me."

* * *

Sakura was checking on Karin and Kouki when she looked for her. Since that day they brought them to Konoha she hadn’t been in the hospital. She feared to meet the woman, she feared to see the baby, because she knew she couldn’t handle the emotional turmoil in her unstable state. Ibiki wanted to talk to her tomorrow. Ino knew what he wanted to say to her. That she was a burden in her current condition and she should consider leaving the T & I. It was a mistake to pretend everything was fine.

Ino wanted to talk with Sakura, drink a cup of tea or coffee, before she would see her therapist for the first time. After Chouji had found her at the cemetery, he had helped her to overcome her fear to open up to someone with a professional background. She had asked Sakura the same day if she could recommend someone.

Still, she feared their first appointment. She was so scared. Even more than before heading to war. What if that woman would ask her questions she hadn’t answered herself up to now? Or made it worse than before?

Chouji had listened to her, held her in his arms, while she sobbed and screamed about the unfairness of the world. She thought she was better than this; better than this pathetic person she had become over the course of the last months. She had let her friends down, build a place inside her heart and head that nobody was allowed to enter. She regretted her harsh words and ignoring the people important to her, making them worry.

She lingered at the doorstep of the room and watched as Sakura checked on Kouki.

It should have been Sakura’s child.

Yesterday it occurred to her why the sudden appearance of Karin and Sasuke’s child had made her feeling even more depressed than before. She had realised that she never stood a chance against Sakura in their constant, absolute silly competition for Sasuke’s attention. They had acted so unbelievably childish and irrational, like you could win a person’s heart with pressing them into something they didn’t like.

She was reminded of the day back at their Chuunin exams, when Sasuke turned mad because those sound nin had hurt Sakura. She should’ve known at that point loving Sasuke was a lost cause; but she had hoped he would reciprocate her feelings one day. When he would return to Konoha, be the person she had seen behind all that sadness.

“You can come in, Ino,” Sakura said and turned around with Kouki in her arms.

“I didn’t want to disturb you,” Ino gave as a response, “I have my appointment in half an hour and wanted to ask if you’re interested in tea or coffee.”

Karin eyed both women suspiciously and adjusted her glasses. Ino had the feeling as if Karin knew what she had done to Suigetsu and seen in his mind. She still felt so vulnerable, even more than before, and this intense look by that woman didn’t help her. She knew secrets about Sasuke that either Sakura or Ino could know.

_How did it happen? Did she seduce him? Made Sasuke drunk? And why did Sakura treat her like every other patient?_

Ino got so angry imagining the ways Karin could have conceived that child. She knew it bothered her more than it should. It couldn’t be changed and therefore it was even more ridiculous. She just couldn’t help it. The anger and frustration were rising higher.

“Blondie, I can’t read your mind, but I sense what you’re feeling. So do yourself a favour and tell me your problem.”

Her jaw dropped.

“Karin can sense chakra and feelings, because they disrupt the chakra network,” Sakura explained and handed her back Kouki. “He’s fine. Just a few more days and you both can be released out of the hospital.”

“Thanks, Sakura. For everything.” She put a hand over Sakura’s and squeezed it. “Now I owe you two favours.”

Sakura smiled like she always did.

“It’s nothing,” Ino finally answered Karin. The woman snorted.

“You’re such a bad liar. I know you’re angry that I’ve Sasuke’s child. Thinking about the possibilities I trapped him to have sex with me.” Karin looked sad and hurt. “But I can assure you: This just happened without me planning it.”

Sakura seemed to read the room and put herself in front of Karin’s bed.

“We should go for now, Ino.” She grabbed her shoulder and turned her around with a swift motion. “Naruto will check on you later.”

With one last glance Ino left the room. Sakura tried to distract her mind with pointless smalltalk, but Ino was sure Karin meant trouble.

* * *

“I hate this,” Kiba murmured again and looked at the papers Neji had spread on the table.

“Do you think I like this?” he answered and opened another scroll.

This scroll contained more information about the inner buildings of Amegakure. Some Anbu were gathered in the room and looked with observant eyes over the mass of information. He could smell their anticipation and Akamaru showed him with his body language that the men and women were angry. Kiba had a clear hint why.

Kakashi once was in Anbu. He was a skilled shinobi and said to be the next Hokage. They had hurt him in Ame, tortured a man they trusted and thought side by side with. This was personal and Neji knew this too well.

“This mission is off the record.” Neji looked in the eyes of every Anbu member. “I know we don’t have enough people and therefore I want you to be quick. Not more than two weeks and you come back with every information you were able to get.”

“How many people should we take?” a man with a bear mask asked.

“As many as you can spare. And you take Kiba with you.”

Kiba eyed Neji suspiciously. “That’s news to me. Why should I go with them?”

“Because otherwise Naruto will rush to Ame and that’s the last thing you want,” Neji answered.

He didn’t argue. There were things he needed to do and this was his task as a shinobi.

“Tell me what I should do.”

* * *

Ino hadn’t expected her therapist to be just a few years older than her. When she offered her a cup of tea, she tried to gather her composure with holding on to the warm china in her hands and took a few sips.

Kyoko explained to her how they would approach her therapy.

“You decide what you want to tell me, Ino-san,” she said and put her cup down. “I don’t push you if you don’t want to tell me everything. But first tell me why you are here.”  
She swallowed and grabbed her cup harder with shaking hands.

“I can’t cope with the death of my friends and my father,” she whispered. She didn’t dare to look Kyoko in the eyes. “I started drinking alcohol to sleep at night.”

Ino turned her face away from her therapist. Then a gentle hand touched her arm.

“You don’t have to be scared. I’m sure this was hard for you and I’m here to help. Tell me your story.”

She exhaled deeply and with one last look at the ceiling she started to talk. It was about time she got better and faced her inner demons.

* * *

They would start their mission in the middle of the night, so he only had a few hours in advance to prepare and take a short nap. He was walking with Akamaru along the river, making a mental list of things he needed to pack.

His role inside the team with Anbu was an easy one. They needed his jutsu to find the place where they had tortured Kakashi. If there were more prisoners it was compulsive to investigate and warn the other villages in advance. Neji had assumed Konoha wasn’t the only village that had sent spies to Amegakure.

He had visited Kakashi - who was still unconscious - and let Sakura heal his broken nose. Without an intact nose he wasn’t of use for the mission. He maybe was a bit disappointed he didn’t find Ino, but Sakura said she was busy with something.

It had to be something personal because otherwise she would have told him, and it was nagging him. He knew that this was irrational. He wasn’t her boyfriend. Ino didn’t have to tell him what she was doing. It still bothered him.

He didn’t watch his surroundings and therefore almost missed Ino sitting at the riverside, with her legs bent and hugging them. She looked so beautiful with the light of the setting sun illuminating her. Kiba threw all caution to the winds and walked up to her. She would send him away if she didn’t want company.

Akamaru didn’t have any patience and licked Ino’s arm. She lifted her head from her knees. That was the moment realised he had made a mistake. Her eyes were rimmed red and puffed. She had been crying; again.

“Hey, it’s you,” she said weakly.

“I’m sorry, Ino. I didn’t want to disturb you.”

“It’s okay, Kiba. The day can’t get any worse.”

She started to fondle Akamaru behind his ears and a small, slightly visible smile raised at her mouth. He knew how much it helped to have a dog. Without Akamaru his mental health would’ve been in a much worse state.

He placed himself beside Akamaru, in a secure distance, so Ino wouldn’t feel even more uncomfortable. His dog now turned on his back, so Ino could rub his belly. Akamaru loved belly rubs.

“He likes you a lot,” Kiba said as Akamaru now let his tongue slip outside his mouth. “Besides me, only Hinata was allowed to do this.”

Ino continued stroking Akamaru. “Do you miss her? And Shino?”

“Every day,” he answered with a gulp in his throat. “I still can’t believe they’re gone. They didn’t deserve a death like this.”

“I understand your pain.” He heard her choke. “I lost my sensei and my father last year. So many of my friends are gathered at the cemetery and will never talk to me again. I think I don’t treasure my life enough. I tried to lie to myself that I’m okay. And I was very bad at hiding it.”

She grabbed his hand and squeezed it, focusing her look on him. Her expression was so intense and painted with pain. “I know you’re worried about me, Kiba. But you can stop now.”

“I will never stop worrying about you. You’re important to me.” He gave her a short smile.

Ino averted from him and watched the sun dancing on the glittering water.

“I saw a therapist today. I want to get rid of my problems.”

“And did it help you?” he asked, questioning.

“Maybe. We will see.”

Obviously she didn't want to talk further about this topic. He just enjoyed her hand still holding his.

They sat in silence until the sun was completely gone. Akamaru had decided to sleep until his owner decided to go home. He would have loved to sit with Ino forever, but his mission laid ahead.

"I need to go home," he disturbed the peaceful atmosphere. "I've got a mission."

Ino's shoulders sagged.

"You go to Amegakure, aren't you?"

She sounded sad, defeated and angry.

"Yeah. It's a confidential mission."

When she looked back at him, he wasn't expecting her leaning to him and putting her lips on his. He was taken by surprise and forgot to breath till her sweet lips disappeared. They twisted into a smile and her cheeks blushed. 

"Please don't do anything reckless and come back alive."

Kiba was still in shock , when she stood up, ready to leave him. He couldn't pass this opportunity and jumped up. This one kiss wasn't enough. 

"Ino, one moment."

She raised her eyebrows, when he gently touched her by her shoulders and turned her around. Then he cradled her face in his hands and this time he kissed her. If she was surprised by this Ino didn't show, but came nearer. He didn't want to cross more borders, so he pulled her to his chest.

"If you agree I would like to take you on a date, once I'm back."

She sighed. "I don't know why I kissed you, Kiba. And I'm totally confused. Didn't we do this in the wrong order?"

He laughed soundly, relieved she didn't slap or yelled at him.

"I don't want to rush things. We do everything at your own pace." He put a kiss on her head. "Just don't kiss other men while I'm away. That would break my heart."

He didn't intend to make her laugh, but as he heard Ino giggle because of his dumb joke, he was happy and this bubbly feeling in his stomach was omnipresent, rushing through his whole body. 

"I'll do what I can," she answered and didn't mind as he again touched her lips with his.

They stood at the riverside for a long time and didn't care if someone could see them. Kiba hoped this was a good sign and Ino really got better. 

He was looking forward to their first date. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I also recommend the cover of this song by Placebo. 😉
> 
> We finally got some progress between Ino and Kiba! 😁
> 
> Next chapter we will see how things are in the Land of Iron.


	14. A Beautiful Lie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: 30 Seconds To Mars - "A Beautiful Lie"

“We can’t wait any longer,” Tsunade repeated the third day in a row. “The Gokage are all here besides the leader of the Land of Rivers and Kusagakure. Nobody else answered the invitation. We can’t delay the meeting any longer, Mifune.”

Gaara watched as Tsunade clenched her fist. She was angry since they got word from Konoha that Hatake Kakashi had come back from Amegakure barely alive. He knew the details of this because of Shikamaru. She never could find out because it was confidential intel that Konoha nin had shared with him. He knew that his sisters’ boyfriend was full of anger that this happened to one of their most gifted shinobi, one of the heroes of the war and he was sure he heard him curse under his breath. Something he didn't think the man was capable of.

He heard the whispering voices behind the curtains. Their aids sat hidden there, observing the room for potential threats to their respective kage. The voices of his siblings sounded worried, with a hint of frustration in his brothers’ voice. Like the Raikage the Hokage had a short temper. Last time it had been A who had destroyed the table. Maybe this time it would be Lady Tsunade. It was still unsettling to see Darui and Kurotsuchi sitting at this table. The first Five Kage Summit was such a distant memory and still so imprinted in his mind.

He missed Onoki and A.

He spared a glance at Kurotsuchi. She was sitting completely still at the table. He hadn’t seen her since the last time a meeting had been held, shortly after the war. She wasn’t visibly angry, but it felt like she was vibrating, changing the mood in the room with just her presence. Until now nobody had had the audacity to talk about the explosions in Suna, Kumo and Kiri. And he was sure she would deny every involvement with this.

“Gaara,” Kankuro whispered.

“What is it, Kankuro?” he answered with a short movement of his lips.

“Tsunade is right, “ Temari responded. “We can’t wait for something that’s not happening.”

He knew they were right. Still he hoped that the smaller villages had a change of mind and only were late. The Land of Iron was uncommon for the most shinobi. The cold and the snow had the same effect on them like the blazing sun in the Land of Wind.

“I know.” He crossed his arms and cleared his throat. “I just don’t like it.”

He heard an agreeing grumble by Kankuro, while Temari sighed. They would never question his decisions. He trusted their assessment and listened to their suggestions. Without them he wasn’t able to be the Kazekage Suna needed.

“I agree with Lady Tsunade,” he interrupted Mifune, who was arguing they should wait just one more day. “Because we have to discuss some serious issues regarding Iwagakure.”

I went so quiet you could hear a pin drop.

* * *

She was resting beside Kakashi’s bed when suddenly the heart monitor started beeping loud and made her wake up with a start. Her medic instinct kicked in at this very second, reaching for the pulse on Kakashi’s throat as she realised he had his eyes wide open, and his heart was acting up because of a panic attack.

“You’re safe, Kakashi-sensei,” she spoke with a calm voice, grabbing his hand and brushing her thumb over his knuckles. He still was breathing hard and trembled, but his heart rate was getting back to normal. He exhaled and inhaled deeply, trying to get control over his body. His hand grabbed his mask and he pulled it down.

She had seen Kakashi without a mask a few times now. It was inevitable at some point, but she was still amazed he hid his beautiful face behind this layer of fabric. She knew he did this because he felt safe around her.

“Where...where is Lady Tsunade?” he asked with a raspy voice.

“In the Land of Iron.”

“I need to talk to her.”

His voice made clear it was urgent. “You just woke up, Kakashi-sensei. You need rest and -”

“Stop this, Sakura,” he interrupted her. “This is more important than me getting well. The Hokage needs to know that…” he started coughing.

She helped him to lift his upper body up, so he could breathe better. He had several broken ribs, she just had mended. His lungs had collapsed. And she didn’t dare to think about all the other injuries. He had to face a long and hard recovery time.

“If you tell me I can message Tsunade-shishou,” she offered. “You can trust me, Kakashi-sensei.”

She saw the tears in his waterline and had to gulp. She never had seen him cry and it made her so vulnerable. He had been put through so many hardships and still carried on as if it was nothing.

“Call for Naruto and Gai,” he finally squeezed out with difficulties. “And Yamato. Nobody else is allowed to hear what I tell you, Sakura.”

“Of course, Kakashi-sensei.”

* * *

Karui wasn’t surprised that the Kazekage agreed with the Hokage. They shared a deeper bond than the rest of the Five Hidden Villages and she was grateful for their support of the right decision in this case. She had tried to persuade Darui to do something, anything, so they could finally confront Kurotsuchi with her wrong behaviour. All of the attendants of the meeting were dancing around this topic for days. They shared their meals and exchanged pleasantries, while they all knew the leader of Iwagakure was the cause for the explosions in their Villages. Not to speak of the death threat she had sent to Tsunade. The cause for all of this was the unreasonable behaviour of this woman. She didn't dare to think further. She was on the edge of anger since the attack on the school. She shut her eyes, the picture of a sobbing Kairi flooded her mind.

She was fully aware the mood in the room changed after Gaara spoke the words she had been waiting for since their arrival in Tetsu no Kuni.

She couldn’t see the Tsuchikage’s face, when Gaara took out the exploding clay he had found in Sunagakure, but this evidence was the last proof they needed. He talked about Kekkei Genkai and how common users of explosives were in Iwagakure. No one objected. It was common knowledge.

“That doesn’t look good,” Omoi said beside her, nervously fiddling with the stick of his last lollipop. “I don’t like this at all.”

“Me neither,” she mumbled in his direction. “But we need to define the boundaries. She has gone too far with attacking the villages, her allies.”

"A week ago not only Suna, but Kiri and Kumo were hit by explosions," Gaara said and looked into the eyes of the Kage, Yaten and Akira - the leader of Kusa. "Not only did it cost many lives, but destroyed our hospital." His voice was barely audible, but loud enough to catch every word.

"I didn't care who attacked my people," he continued. "But then I found this. In all the shambles."

Karui guessed he pointed at the clay.

"Why do you dance around this, Kazekage? Just spill it. You think it was my village that attacked yours," Kurotsuchi challenged him. "Therefore all this bullshit about Kekkei Genkai. You wanted to point at me and my people. That we did this."

"I didn't say so."

Kurotsuchi laughed without any emotion.

"Isn't it a coincidence that your village wasn't affected?" Darui threw in.

Karui applauded inwardly at her kages' comment. Darui was a lot calmer than A and didn't make valid points with shouting at people; or throwing things around. She bet that Tsunade was that kind of person. She regretted she sat at her place. Omoi at least could see everything.

"And why isn't Konoha in the crossfire?" Kurotsuchi snapped.

"We don't have unresolved anger issues."

Shikamaru flinched slightly as he heard Tsunade striking this tone. He looked at Temari and Kankuro. Both were shaking their heads because of the heated discussion. Shizune put her flat hand at her forehead.

"I told her she should hold back."

"She doesn't listen to us," he murmured.

"She never listens to anyone."

He could only agree. Tsunade wasn't easy to handle. Her intake of sake since the end of the war didn't help either. He thought she was ready to retire and let someone else take over the reins.

Shikamaru knew his father had been in favour for Kakashi to be the Rokudaime Hokage as many other clan leaders and higher ups in Konohagakure. He hoped not only for the sake of Kakashi, but for Sakura and Naruto that the torture in Ame hadn't had any serious after-effects. Naruto wouldn't be ready to be Hokage for years. And he wasn't ready to help him either. Both of them needed to grow more, learn the inner builts of Konoha and slowly form a path for peace.

He craved for a smoke so much. A clear mind would help him to see the connection and the outcome of this meeting. Now it was a blurry picture with little information. Also the thick air made his headache acting up again. He looked back at Temari one more time, saw how her lips curved into an amused smile, while Mifune tried to calm down all the participants.

To his own shame he hadn't listened to the ongoing discussion, so lost in his own thoughts. He couldn't concentrate.

"I need a cigarette," he said to Shizune.

"You really should quit this habit."

He made a hand gesture, taking out the lighter and the box of cigarettes, as he silently left the room. He almost reached the exit of the building when suddenly a man with snow-white skin, long black hair and yellow eyes stood in his way.

He knew this man and the cigarette he wanted to place between his lips dropped to the floor.

"So Tsunade has a new man of the Nara clan at her side," he hissed like a snake. "Nice to meet you."

"I can't say I return the favour."

He let some chakra rush through his body, to alert Tsunade and the others. They didn't invite Otogakure. And they didn't invite Orochimaru.

Shikamaru seldom felt fear, but standing in front of one of the legendary sannin made him shiver. He felt weak. So endlessly weak.

But running away wasn't an option.

* * *

Ino hadn’t slept well in the night. She had been dreaming about war, mixed with the cruel memories of Suigetsu. At four in the morning she decided to give up on sleeping and did some meditation. It helped a bit to ease her mind and distract her from wanting to drink alcohol.

Her therapist had given her the task to write a diary. She wanted her to scribble down some notes how she felt that day and what was upsetting her. Also she should write down three moments of her day that made her happy.

Yesterday had been easy on the latter. She still felt Kiba’s touch on her lips, how he pulled her closer to kiss her properly. She blushed at the thought.

She didn’t know what got into her, because she wasn’t this impulsive and most of all didn’t kiss men out of the blue. Some part of her regretted kissing Kiba. The other part of her wanted more.

This bubbly, warm feeling in her chest and stomach, while she thought about his scent, his touch and the smile he shared with her, when they said goodbye - she never had felt like this before. Ino always had thought she would be Sasuke’s wife or maybe marry Sai, since both of them were very handsome and her type. Kiba was so different. He smiled the whole day and made funny remarks and dumb jokes. He was never without his dog and even talked to him.

She was worried she had thrown herself into something she wasn’t capable of handling in her fragile state. Kiba deserved a woman, who didn’t carry this much of emotional baggage and unpredictable moods. She had lost herself. Didn’t care about her appearance, her friends and not in the slightest for love.

_What if he expected more?_

They hadn’t talked about the kisses, just grinned at each other shyly when they parted. He was gone now, heading to Ame for a mission and she was alone with the battle of mind and heart.

“Yamanaka,” Ibiki greeted her as he entered the room. “Seems we have to talk.”

Ino straightened her shoulders. She had forgotten why she was sitting here in his office.

* * *

He was the first at the scene after he recognised Shikamaru’s chakra. He just formed some chakra threads, attached them to Shikamaru’s limbs and pulled him away from Orochimaru. He heard Temari open her fan and a sand barrier built in front of them. Shikamaru let out a relieved sigh while Kankuro unpacked Sasori from his scroll. He didn’t know why he always had to rescue him out of dangerous situations and hoped this didn’t repeat so soon.

Shikamaru was now kneeling between him and Temari, gathering his shadow.

“Orochimaru,” Tsunade called out and passed the sand after she gave Gaara a sign. “What are you doing here?”

“Isn’t it nice that everyone got an invite to this nice little meeting but not Otogakure?”

The snake man responded with his low, threatening voice.

“We had our reasons,” Mei answered.

“Since when do we work with traitors?” Darui asked with a growl.

“Don’t forget some of you owe me their lives.”

“We owe you nothing.”

Gaara’s voice sounded so angry. He hadn’t heard him using this tone for years. Kankuro was used to this, but it made his hair stand up. His sand was moving to Orochimaru, trying to capture him, while Kurotsuchi ran into his direction.

They knew it was pointless. Orochimaru had snuck into this building unnoticed by some of the most powerful shinobi. The samurai guards hadn’t alerted them. He wasn’t invincible but immortal at least and Kankuro hoped that Orochimaru didn’t crash this meeting to announce a war. He still knew how it ended the first time. He didn’t want a repetition.

As expected Orochimaru jumped out of the way, but Shikamaru sent his shadow in the direction to catch him. Slippery like always he managed to dodge every attack. Finally some Samurai had gathered for reinforcements.

“You’re so impatient. I am here to talk and not to fight.”

“You didn’t come here without an agenda, Orochimaru. What do you want?” Tsunade’s voice was sharp like a knife.

“Help you,” he said with a smug smile. “Because I know you need help to keep Iwagakure at bay. Don’t you want to talk about your preparations for war, Tsuchikage?”

Kurotsuchi turned her head to Orochimaru. “How dare you?”

“I would be really interested to hear more about it,” Mifune commented. “Wasn’t peace the common goal of this alliance?”

“Who cares about peace?” Kurotsuchi spat out. “Lady Tsunade is the reason we lost our leader. I want revenge.”

Kankuro groaned. All the time he hoped they could talk some sense into her, but as he saw her now, her whole body trembling with anger, he knew it was a lost cause.

* * *

The worst enemy wasn’t the shinobi that had attacked him in the Land of Wind months ago, it was rain. The rain surrounding Amegakure washed away every trace of scent and made it difficult for him to find the facilities where they had held Kakashi prisoner and tortured him.

Akamaru whined beside him, complaining he couldn’t smell anything.

“Sorry, buddy. I know this is almost impossible, but we do our best.”

His ninken wagged his tail and continued sniffing.

“Don’t you think it’s time for a break?” Hanabi asked him.

Since Neji couldn’t leave the village himself he had suggested they should take his cousin as support to the mission. Luckily one of the Anbu was from the Aburame clan. He was used to working with both of the clans, even if he wished that they were Hinata and Shino.

“Do your eyes hurt?”

He saw her shaking her head. “No, but I know that you need rest.”

“It’s okay, Hanabi. We shouldn’t stay at this place so long. And head back to the meeting point.”

“I don’t remember you being so stubborn and cautious.”

“You haven’t seen war,” he answered brusquely. “Or else you would know why I insist we head back to Konoha if we don’t find something tomorrow.”

“You sound so much like Neji.” She blew some hair out of her face.

“If you get hurt he will kill me, I hope you know that.”

She snorted. “I’m a Hyuuga. I don’t get killed so easily.”

Kiba almost reached the end of his tether. He didn’t know why she got on his nerves today. Hanabi was a pleasant company and he thought about her like his little sister. Maybe it was because they were in the enemies territory or the fact they didn’t accomplish anything until now. He got the feeling this mission was pointless. Hinata wouldn’t like the fact he had her sister with him.

“We go back to the others and share our observations,” he decided and whistled so Akamaru came back.

Something inside him hoped they could go back soon. He wanted to take Ino on a date and for once forget that war was approaching them at a rapid pace.

* * *

Shikamaru didn’t protest as she wanted to accompany him outside the building. He followed her through the ice and snow into the woods until she grabbed him by his collar and pressed his back into the next tree, kissing him. He gave in, his hands resting on her hips while she continued attacking him with angry kisses. He knew her too well and didn’t stop until she let go of him, turning around to hide the angry tears welling up. He touched her shoulder slightly for comfort.

“I can’t do this any longer,” she uttered. “I’m so done with all these complications and unforeseen visitors. I thought we could get some time to breathe and build peace. Instead the alliance is shattering into pieces with each additional day.”

As usual he sighed. “You’re not alone, Tem.”

“I know, but that doesn’t make it better.”

He hugged her from behind and she felt her tension subsided. Shikamaru had this effect on her. Most times she was the one giving comfort to him, but she treasured the times he helped her with her insecurities and flaws. She almost had lost him. She was still haunted from his sight on that bed after the war had ended.

_“Tem.”_

_As she turned around and saw her brother alive, she just wanted to hug him and never let go. But his face was painted with a deep frown and she knew Kankuro had bad news._

_“What has happened?”_

_“It’s Shikamaru.”_

_She didn’t even listen to him, just followed her brother till they reached the tent where they treated Shikamaru. She scared the medics away with her brash attitude and only Kankuro was allowed to stay on her side, while she was sitting at his bed crying._

_He told her that he was injured badly at one of his eyes. She didn’t need further information since the right side of Shikamaru’s face was covered in bandages._

_“I did everything I could, Tem. But I was too late.”_

_“I know you did,” she answered in between the sobs._

_When Shikamaru reached consciousness again she was so relieved she threw herself at his chest. He hugged her weakly and told her everything is going to be okay._

_She believed him._

“Let’s go back, Tem,” he whispered into her ear, kissing it. “It’s cold and I’m sure they want to continue the meeting.”

“Can you promise me something, Shikamaru?”

“Everything you want.”

“Stop throwing yourself in dangerous situations,” she said and turned around to look at him. Her hand rested at his right side, where the eyepatch covered his blind eye. “I can’t lose you.”

He chuckled. “I don’t look for trouble. It always seems to find me.” He gave her a short kiss. “Like you.”

She noticed her cheeks blushing.

“Stop being so sappy, crybaby.”

* * *

After returning from the bathroom, she threw herself back on the bed and wrapped the blanket tightly around her body. She didn't have the strength for more and closed her eyes, slowly drifting back into a slumber. She was in this stage of not completely awake but not asleep yet, when a loud knock on her door made her jump out of the sheets.

"Tenten!" Neji shouted outside. "I know you're home, so open the door and stop avoiding me!"

She had seen this coming. Neji would be worried if she didn't contact him within a few days when both of them were in Konoha. He knew she wasn't on a mission, since he was involved in the logistics of distributing them. So it was a matter of time when he showed up, not if he would look for her.

Tenten had a simple reason for hiding: She was scared. So scared he would reject her or get angry because she was pregnant with his child. They had talked about this various times and every time he said, he wanted to have a family, but first he needed to get rid of the curse seal of the branch family. Also she didn’t want to burden him with even more bad news. She imagined it to be a happy day. A day Neji and she had waited for after they had married and his clan was able to recognise his full potential. Instead she had to tell him that nothing worked out as planned.

The child, the little bean inside her didn't know yet how much fate already had interefed before he or she was born. Tenten hadn't come to a solution up till now. She didn't even know what she should say to Neji.

_I am sorry I mess your life up even more?_

"Tenten, please. Did something happen? Are you sick?"

He sounded so pleading she had no other choice. Neji wouldn't go away if she ignored him longer.

Either her gut told her to stay put, she raised out of the bed and opened the door. Behind it Neji was standing with dark shades under his eyes. Seemed he hadn't slept well the last few days and it was her fault. She had to tell him.

Neji watched her carefully setting the cups for tea on the table. In all those years he had never seen her thus pale and fragile. He knew something was wrong. He didn't think she was sick. He wanted to ask her, but she put a hand on his and shook her head.

"Please don't ask questions, Neji. I have to tell you something rather important."

He nodded. He had felt so uneasy and completely lost the last days. They hadn't talked in days. Normally she wasn't like this.

Tenten was never afraid to tell him what was bothering her. They were teammates a long, long time before they started dating. He trusted her with his life. So her behaviour made him think it had to be a personal thing. Something that was affecting him. He felt uneasy looking at her, breathing hard, with her lips pressed together they were just a thin line.

"I don't know how to tell you this, without you freaking out," she started her speech.

His heart dropped. He couldn't breathe. She would break up. She was fed up with keeping their relationship a secret. He had feared this day. The day he would lose her. His ears were buzzing. He wasn't able to catch her words.

"...pregnant."

He was sure she hadn't said this.

"What?" he burst out. He felt dizzy.

"Didn't you listen, Neji? I am pregnant."

"You are pregnant?"

He heard how dumb he sounded. Not like him at all. Like a stranger. He saw tears forming in her eyes. He realised he had reacted completely wrong. Her face contorted with pain and fear. Fear he would reject her.

Within seconds she was on her feet, ready to run away. He jumped up, grabbing her, turning her around and pulling her into a tight embrace.

"I'm sorry, Tenten. I didn't react the right way," he said softly in her ear. "I just didn't expect this. I thought you avoided me because you want to break up."

She sniffled and glared at him with wide eyes. "Why should I do this?"

"Because I'm a Hyuuga. My whole clan wants to get rid of me. They hate that I don't act like they expected from me. And because of this we have to have to keep this a secret between us."

She chuckled and giggled. She was relieved.

"Why should I? I love you, Neji. I’ve known you for years and your clan with his antics. You don’t get rid of me so easily.”

He kissed her soundly.

“So you’re not angry?” she asked after he let go of her again.

“There’s no reason,” he said. “We haven’t planned this, but I think we can work things out. We can make it work.”

* * *

“So you’re saying that Orochimaru has teamed up with Amegakure,” Yamato repeated and looked Kakashi dead serious in the eye.

Kakashi nodded and Naruto recognised how he grabbed the sheets of his bed harder. His sensei was still in such a bad state and sweat was gathering on his forehead. Sakura bit her lip.

“We have to tell Lady Tsunade immediately,” Gai suggested. "And it has to be in person. Such news are better not be heard by the Konoha Council."

“I will go to the Land of Iron.”

All heads turned to him.

“You can’t go, Naruto,” Sakura burst out. “We need you inside the village.”

He felt the anger rising in his chest. Why did they always order him to stay put and most of all inside the village? He wasn’t a kid any longer. He could help with all the problems they were facing.

“Sakura is right, Naruto.”

If Kakashi-sensei thought it was right to stay inside the village he better considered to stay, but he didn’t want to. Orochimaru had robbed him of Sasuke and he didn’t want another war starting from two sides this time. Because it would happen. They hadn’t recovered from the last war until now.

It was so warm in this room, so full of stifling air that made him breathe harder.

“But who is going to inform, Granny-Tsunade, dattebayo?” He made a hand gesture. “I know that most of our Anbu and shinobi are helping to keep the village safe. The rest is outside helping the other nations.”

“I will go,” Yamato said and sighed. “Gai can’t go because of his wheelchair. Sakura is needed in the hospital. And you Naruto need to protect the village inside these walls if something happens. You are the most powerful shinobi we have at the moment in Konoha.”

Yamato left the room with Gai and Naruto followed them, waiting for Sakura. She just wanted to check on Kakashi before they would go to Ichiraku.

“I wish we still had Sai,” Sakura muttered with a hurt voice as she entered the hallway. “It would’ve been easier to contact Tsunade-shishou.”

“I know, Sakura-chan.”

He gave her a nudge to the shoulder and hugged her with one arm. Naruto hoped one day she would smile again.

* * *

Ino wasn’t looking good at all when he picked her up at the flower shop. Her eyes were rimmed red and she was paler than usual. So he decided to cheer her up and bought her some ice cream.

They were sitting on a bench at one of the playgrounds, watching the children building sandcastles and jumping up and down the monkey bars. It was so peaceful in this unsteady time. He wanted those carefree days back, when all he wanted to do was watch clouds with Shikamaru while they ate chips.

Ino’s ice was already melting and dropping from her hand, because like him she was looking at the kids.

_Did she think the same?_

“Are you okay, Ino?”

“I can’t tell, Chouji,” she said and licked on her ice cream. “Today was such a rough day. I was fired from the T & I.”

He stopped in his motion and turned his head.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. It really is. I didn’t fit into this place. It was too much for me.”

Chouji put an arm around her shoulders to pull her to his chest. Ino was the type who needed some cuddles to cheer her up. She sniffed as hugged him.

“I didn’t tell my mother yet. I am a total failure. I let my clan down.”

“Don’t say things like these.” He squeezed her arm. “Nobody expects you to be perfect, Ino. You still can work in the Barrier team. I’m sure you’re better suited to work there.”

“But my father did both. He worked in the Torture and Interrogation force and the Barrier Team. He wouldn’t be proud.”

He sighed.

Like Shikamaru she tended to beat herself up about all the clan things. Next year all three of them would take over their responsibilities as heads of their clans. Chouza had made it possible his friends could adjust a bit longer and talked the Yamanaka and Nara clan members out of rushing to inaugurate them this year. But it didn’t stop both of them to act reckless.

“You don’t know, Ino. You must find your own path. Build your own future.”

She wiped the tears from her eyes and sat straight.

“Since when you’re so wise, Chouji? Normally Shikamaru says such things.”

He laughed shortly. “You always underestimate me.”

“Can I ask you something?”

“You can ask me anything.”

“Do you think I am loveable?”

That was the most confusing question she had ever asked him. He wasn’t prepared for such a question. Of course she was loveable. She always protected him and Shikamaru, cared so much for her friends and the wishes of her customers at the flower shop.

She smiled so beautiful, and he didn’t dare to think about her long, blond hair. A blush crept up his cheeks. He once had a crush on her. 

“Chouji?”

“Do you hit me if I say the wrong things?”

Instantly she giggled. “I’m serious. I need a mans’ opinion.”

Now he knew what this was about.

“Who is it?” he asked grinning.

“I-I...I don’t know what you mean.”

He threw his ice cream into the bin. This was more important than food.

“You wouldn’t ask if this was about a guy. You _never_ have asked things like that before. So who is this guy.”

Ino played with her fingers, hemmed and hawed and her head got red like a tomato.

“I may have kissed Kiba.”

“Kissed?” he repeated dumbfounded. “On the cheek?”

She shook her head.

“On the lips?” His voice went a pitch higher.

He hadn’t expected this confession. Chouji liked Kiba a lot and thought he was a good guy. But he wasn’t excactly the kind of guy Ino would be interested in. He saw her eyes glow with happiness, while she still fiddled with her fingers.

“Did it make you feel good?”

Now she nodded.

“And he didn’t pressure you to kiss him?”

“Actually I kissed him first.”

Instead of answering this, he smiled at her.

He hadn’t seen her this happy since months. Chouji was convinced Ino would get better soon.

And he had to talk with Kiba.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since I already introduced Karin, Suigetsu and Juugo it was just a matter of time, when Orochimaru would make his appearance. 😉😁
> 
> My favourite part is the talk between Chouji and Ino, because I need more wholesome Ino-Chouji moments. (Maybe some of you recognized how much I love Ino-Shika-Cho and the Sand Siblings) 
> 
> Next week (yes, the chapter is already written) we will dig deeper into the Hyuuga drama and Neji and Tenten's relationship.


	15. Don't Speak

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: No Doubt - "Don't speak"

He held Tenten close that night, smothering her with kisses, feeling safe and content around her. Neji knew she needed the safety that he would stay at her side no matter what happened. She barely cried or showed weakness, because all of them had a rough, demanding training routine with Gai-sensei. Broken bones, bruises and exhaustion weren't an excuse for dropping out of training or shedding tears. The determination of Lee had shown all of them that it was possible to get better with effort.

At days like this he missed Lee. Their teammate had made him think nothing was impossible. He was in high spirits, never gave up hope and helped to keep them in a good mood. But the war had changed everything.

Every time he met for training now it was only him and Tenten. Gai couldn’t join in with their fights. He still trained, but with just one leg, bound to a wheelchair his movements were restricted. It didn’t bother their sensei so much, but Neji knew that Gai was heartbroken that one of his students died in war.

_Gai decided they should meet in their favourite restaurant after the funeral. Neji knew he should have joined Hanabi and the rest of his clan to mourn for Hinata and Hiashi, but he could not leave his team behind. They were more important to him, than the demanding elders, who pressed to declare a new clan head as soon as possible. Hanabi understood that he didn’t join. She gave him a long hug before she went back to the Hyuuga compound, just asking him to come back later._

_None of them wanted to eat or say a word._

_Tenten was crying silently at his side and Gai looked like he passed out any second. He was just out of the hospital for two days and still couldn’t believe his leg would never be the same again. Maybe it hadn’t been such a good idea to grab a meal together._

_“We should bring out a toast.” Gai looked at them with tears in his eyes. “For Lee and the springtime of youth!”_

_Neji struggled to hold back his own tears but raised his glass._

“You should sleep,” Tenten said with a soft voice. “You don’t sleep enough.”

He kissed her hair. “Don’t worry about me. I get enough sleep.”

She didn’t answer but turned around in his grasp, burying her head at his chest. He held her close and thought about all the things that the future had prepared for him.

* * *

Tenten had been cleared from the mission roster. Neji had insisted she should stop taking missions and she didn’t want him to worry more about her well-being. It was standard protocol for pregnant kunoichi to stop going on missions. The only good thing was that since Neji had control over those things during Tsunade’s absence, she could pretend everything stayed the same as long as possible.

She slipped in the library and gathered some books about pregnancy.

She needed to prepare herself for all the things that were about to come. The decision to keep it a secret made it impossible for her to ask her mother, aunts or grandmother for advice. She would have loved to talk with one of her friends, knowing Sakura or Ino would help her if she asked, but Neji had made it clear, they needed all the time possible, that he could make some arrangements inside the clan.

Hanabi would be the only person they would tell, because she was the official clan head, even if the elders didn’t like it. Tenten sighed as she flipped through the books. Her life had changed so much during the last year and would change even more.

She couldn’t imagine herself as a mother. She never had been the type to woo boys and talk about love with other women. She liked weapons and ninja tools, training and going on missions. There was no time for such trivial things like love, and bearing children.

She dug into the first book that she had taken out the shelf and looked around if somebody she knew was near her. If they saw her reading books about pregnancy she didn’t know how to explain this. Also she didn’t want to lend the books either because it would be too suspicious. Better she left no traces.

* * *

Yamato had left the village early in the morning to leave for Tetsu no Kuni and Neji waited for news from Kiba’s team. Yet he wasn’t convinced it was a good idea he had sent Hanabi with them. He should have gone himself to Amegakure. His cousin was too young to be sent on such dangerous missions, but he had no other choice. Not many other members of his clan trusted him, the other way around he casted doubt on their loyalty and thus this decision needed to be made.

He had instructed Kiba to withdraw from any dangerous situation, hoping he didn’t act reckless if he took care of his former teammates younger sister. A week has passed without a hint of development.

Sitting in a sticky office, waiting for his comrades to come back wasn’t his work of choice. Tracking down nukenin, gathering intel, assassinating missing shinobi was what he wanted and craved for so badly it hurt.

Neji sighed as he closed the door of the office which was usually occupied by Shikamaru. Koharu and Homaru of the Konoha Council had asked for a meeting with him and the clan heads to discuss the next steps. He knew this meeting was just to keep him at bay, asking for information regarding Kakashi and all the other things that made his job - he didn’t want in the first place - even more unnerving.

Hopefully he could eat lunch with Tenten today. And then leaving her to go back to the Hyuuga compound for even more elders, who want to threaten him.

Again it was time he wished he some things were different.

* * *

The morning sickness was bothering her more than every other day and she wondered why it was called ‘morning sickness’ if she wanted to throw up all the time she smelled a spicy dish or other prominent scents. When she walked across the main street in Konoha she had to run into one of the backstreets as scent made her gag, and throw up in one of the bins. The older woman, who was sweeping the path in front of her house, looked at her curious as she wiped her mouth.

“Pregnant women should take it easy,” the little woman with a bun on her head said with a tender smile. “Especially if you’re a kunoichi.”

Tenten stared at her lost for words.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, obasama,” she answered and straightened her back.

The elderly woman chuckled. “Come with me, my girl. I have something that will help you.”

Without further ado the small woman took her hand and led her inside the house.

She was stunned by the various dried herbs and plants hanging from the ceiling and the walls. A soup was cooking on the stove and a red cat was lying on the window sill, obviously slumbering, but shortly opened an eye to observe the new visitor. Tenten hadn’t been in such a cozy place before and sat down as the elderly woman offered her a chair.

She looked around amazed as the woman climbed on a stool and cut herbs from the bundles that were scattered in the room. The smell of lavender and ginger lingered through the air and made her feel dull and content with her life. She could have slept at this very spot and startled, when the woman touched her shoulder.

“You can rest later, girl. Do you want some tea?”

She nodded and the woman turned away, smiling at her again with a knowing smile. Tenten didn’t know this woman, but she was grateful for this sudden unexpected turn of events.

* * *

As expected the Konoha elders didn’t like Neji’s approach of sending a team to Amegakure. He didn’t tell them who he had sent, but Koharu was watching him cautiously, waiting for a hint. If they knew he had Yamato to meet the Hokage, they would have demanded an explanation. One good thing was, he was used to such observations. His grandfather was of the same batch. He didn’t trust the words Neji was speaking and looked for suspicious gestures, face expressions or the use of words, to catch a hidden meaning.

“Kakashi-sensei’s injuries need at least two weeks for healing,” Sakura explained as the higher ups of Konoha had finished grilling him about confidential information. "He will need some time to recover after that. He shouldn't be sent on missions for a month, better would be two."

He had vowed to Lady Tsunade he would not do anything he wasn’t comfortable with during her absence. She had laid the responsibility for the Anbu into his hands. She wanted to test his abilities and trusted his assessment.

“This village is not safe without him,” Homaru said and frowned his eyebrows. “We have not enough shinobi inside the village. We should order back our Anbu and cancel every mission.”

Ino, who sat beside Sakura made a disapproving noise.

“Do you want to say something, Yamanaka-san?” Koharu asked and turned to her.

“I can’t approve of this proposal,” she said, flipping her hair aside and crossing her arms. “The Yamanaka clan will not vote for this approach.”

“Isn’t your mother the official head of the clan till next year, Ino-san?”

One of Neji’s fingers twitched. The elders tried to do everything to suppress the opinions and views of the younger generation. He knew this by heart from his experience inside his clan and he tried not to sigh or express any other emotion. It was time for a change.

Ino’s face didn’t show any emotion either, but as he looked at Sakura he knew that both of them were boiling with anger.

“The Nara clan also votes against this,” Nara Yoshino backed Ino’s position. “There’s no reason for harsh changes until the Godaime is back in Konoha. If we need more protection our clan is happy to help.”

It was amusing to see Homura losing his composure for the fraction of a second as his mouth opened slightly. Yoshino looked very content with her effect on Homaru. Neji didn’t have the chance to work with Nara Shikaku this close before his death, but he saw that Shikamaru’s mother was also blessed with a sharp mind and an even sharper tongue.

“We are very grateful for your help, but I don’t know how the Nara clan can help with the protection, since the Kagemane no Jutsu has its weakness.”

“You forget that the Akimichi clan has abilities that can be helpful to provide additional protection if necessary," Chouza offered.

This time it was Koharu, who hadn’t her emotions under control. “That will not suffice.”

“Good thing we still have the Aburame, Hyuuga and Inuzuka clan,” Inuzuka Tsume said with a grin.

“What are you trying to prove, Koharu-sama?” Aburame Shibi wanted to know. “That we are not able to protect Konoha, when Lady Tsunade is absent? It isn’t the first time that we are without a leader.”

“Iwagakure threatened Konoha. We need to prepare for a counterattack. Since the founding of this village it always has been Iwa, who tried to suppress us.”

Neji was glad they finally showed their true intentions.

“I will not order the Anbu to retreat if there’s no real reason,” he said with a firm voice. “We can wait until Lady Tsunade is back.”

He pushed his chair aside and stood up, like the rest of the clan heads, showing that this meeting was at its end.

He didn’t look back when Koharu and Homaru started to argue with Akimichi Chouza. He had better things to do.

* * *

She stayed for two hours with the old lady and told her everything. Tenten didn’t know why it was so calming to hear the voice of someone much older and wiser than herself. The grandmother wished her luck, when she left with a huge bag filled with different tea, which should help against nausea and morning sickness. Also the woman had given her self-made marmalade with the best wishes for Neji. She hadn’t told who was the father of her child. Even if she trusted that old lady for no other reason than making her feel good, but she wouldn’t take any risks.

She was heading back to her flat and saw Neji standing in the shade of a tree, waiting for her. She smiled as she saw his shoulders sagging. He had been worried.

“I’ve been waiting for you. Where have you been?”

“I met a really nice old lady, who gave me some tea for my morning sickness.”

He raised an eyebrow and walked to her cautiously. “Can I see that tea?”

“Of course, but why are you asking?”

“I’m just curious. It is such a coincidence you ran into someone who gave you tea for your problems.”

He followed her inside her flat and opened the bag with the tea and the marmalade. She yawned and let herself fall on her bed, feeling so tired all of the sudden.

Neji studied the different leaves and other components of the tea. He sniffed like a dog before he put it all back into the jute sack.

“I’m not sure if you should use this tea.”

“And why, Neji?” she asked while she put her legs on her bed and grabbed a pillow.

“I can’t exactly pinpoint why but this makes me nervous.”

“Do you think this cute old lady wants to poison me?”

Tenten let out a laugh, but stopped as she saw Neji’s brows furrow and his face getting harder.

“Did you see what she put inside the bag? This could be anything. I want someone else to check the contents of this.”

She closed her eyes, trying not to fall asleep.

“Why do you think she wants to harm me?”

Neji sighed and came to her bed. He brushed over her hip, stopping with his hand on her stomach. Tenten wondered when her now flat belly would start to show her pregnancy.

“Sorry, Tenten. I’m just worried. Maybe I’m too negative, but this isn’t easy for me.”

She knew all of this and it made her frustrated. From the start she knew that being in a relationship with Neji wasn’t easy and full of secrets. They dated roughly half a year and she wanted to tell the world. But his stupid clan made it all the more difficult.

“And who should look at its contents? Who can we trust to keep our secret?”

“What about Sakura? She is a medic nin and if we ever need help because you don’t feel well she could help.”

Tenten opened her eyes. “I know what you mean. But isn’t she busy with all the stuff in the hospital? She doesn’t have the time to look after me. And didn't you want to keep it a secret?"

“I know. But we need someone with her skills to help us. So do you agree I ask her?”

She nodded because she was giving in to her want of sleep. Being pregnant made her so tired the whole day. She felt his lips touching her temple.

“I come back later and will cook something. Anything you want?”

“A soup would be fine.”

* * *

He bought all the ingredients for a simple vegetable soup and went to the hospital. He was lucky Sakura wasn’t in surgery but doing paperwork in her office. So he entered after being called in, closing the door behind him cautiously. Sakura was scribbling something into a file and made a hand gesture that he should take a seat.

He put down the groceries and waited for Sakura to finish her work. He knew how much he hated interruptions, so his eyes wandered around the room, scanning the shelves, which bent because of the masses of medical books and scrolls. Sakura had stored so much knowledge on them and he asked himself if had read all of them. Being a medic ninja wasn’t earned easy. In addition to exceptional chakra control, someone with this profession also needed a special intellect.

She had accomplished plenty of things during her training under Lady Tsunade and even surpassed her master. Neji was impressed how much she had grown, when he thought back to the times they all had been Genin. She still was an emotional person, but this was her strength.

“Do you want to borrow some books, Neji? Or did you have another purpose to disturb me?”

Her voice brought him out of his thoughts.

“Sorry, Sakura. I was just wondering if you have read all of those books.”

“Most of them. If I can spare the time I study, but I am so busy these days, that I can’t remember when I last had time for my own research.”

“I am impressed. Never would have thought you would be a doctor someday.”

She smiled at his statement. “So, why are you here?”

“I have a favour to ask and hope I can count on your absolute discretion.”

Sakura cocked her head and put down her pen. “Everything we discuss will stay with me, only with me.”

He exhaled loudly. He knew this was a good idea. Sakura was trustworthy and reliable.

“This is about Tenten and me.”

“Do you need contraception?”

Neji gulped and blushed. This was much too late for that.

“Not exactly. We need advice on something else.”

Her eyes changed colour as the truth dawned upon her. She raised from her chair and touched his shoulder.

“Don’t tell me Tenten is pregnant,” she whispered with a moved voice.

He nodded slowly. Her mouth and eyes formed a perfect round shape. He waited to hear her gasping, instead she put a hand on her mouth.

“How did this happen?”

“I hope I don’t have to explain how sex works.”

Now she giggled. “Sorry, Neji. I didn’t expect this. Are you okay?”

“I still need to recover from the shock. We haven’t planned this.”

“But are you happy?”

“Yes.”

“Congratulations.”

As she spoke these words it suddenly felt so real. He was going to be a father, and he never was more scared in his life.

* * *

Neji was holding her up when she vomited because the smell of the aubergine had stroked a nerve. The gentle touch of his fingers on her back made her feel so miserable she pushed him away, gagging over the toilet, wishing her stomach would stop acting up. She felt wrong, completely controlled by her body, all of the sudden so foreign to her.

When she had finished Neji held out a wet towel. She dapped it first on her sweaty forehead and got rid of the traces of vomit on her mouth. He extended his arm to help her into a standing position.

"Can't you stay tonight?"

"If I don't show up tonight I will out on the weekly meeting of my clan. You know about this."

Tears gathered in her eyes. She was much more emotional and she craved for his company more than ever. She wanted to stay in his strong arms, feeling the warmth of his body and inhale his wonderful scent. He made her feel better with his company.

"Please don't cry, Tenten."

"I can't help it. I feel so vulnerable," she said sobbing. "Everything changes and I can't be with you."

"I come back. I try to sneak out when the meeting is over."

"You would do this for me?"

"When you need me I'm here. Always."

With much regret he left a crying Tenten behind. Her hormones had taken over control and it didn't help to make his guilty conscience go away. He tried to do the best for Hanabi, his clan and Konoha, and every time Tenten was left out of the equation. He urgently needed a solution, order his priorities.

As much as he wanted to be head of the clan, he started to think if it wasn't better to cut off himself from the boundaries and antics of the elders and leave everything behind. He could take Hanabi with him.

"Neji," a voice whispered from behind a tree as he activated his Buyakugan.

The voice belonged to Makoto, who was one of the three people he trusted inside his clan.

"Makoto," he greeted him. "Why are you here?"

"I could ask you the same. Since when do you date that girl?"

"She's my teammate," he answered and continued walking , his clansman beside him.

"It isn't the first time I see you together. Stop lying to me. Don't you know that it's dangerous for you to have a relationship with a woman outside the clan? It weakens your position."

"Maybe I give a damn about that."

He gasped at Neji's sharp tone. "Hanabi isn't old enough to take care of all the duties."

"I know," he hissed and clenched his fist. "But am I not allowed to be happy? Is it impossible to be a Hyuuga and be happy?"

As his companion didn't give an answer he knew that happiness wasn't a goal he could achieve.

* * *

Hormones were a stupid thing Tenten thought when she woke up the next morning without Neji slumbering on her side. Instantly the tears were back and she cried while she tried to make tea. She wasn't like this, missing Neji more than ever. He hadn't left the village and wasn't on a dangerous mission, so it was totally pointless to feel this way.

Neji had his reasons he hadn't come back. His duties were more important. And maybe that was the reason she felt so lonely. The Hyuuga clan always came first and she had to stand back, waiting till he had time for her.

A knock on her door announced a visitor and she shuffled to the door, not fully awake. When she opened it a smiling Sakura came into view.

"Good morning, Tenten."

His grandfather was good. He had difficulties dodging his attacks or hit him at all. He was swift as a mantis, bowing down and back as Neji wanted to press his fingers on the Chakra points. In the next second he extended his arm, palm facing the sky and with a quick motion moved the air into Neji's direction.

He tried to find a pattern in his fighting style, there always was a pattern. His uncle had learned from this man, so there had to be a hint. Neji imprinted even the movement of his grandfather's hair into his mind.

_Focus, Neji._

"I never liked that Hiashi trained you in our secret clan techniques," his grandfather said as he jumped forward. Neji turned around, escaping the attack barely and bending down deep to catch some momentum for a counter attack.

"But he did," Neji answered, running fast towards his grandfather, his hands matching the speed of his feet. Of course he avoided every attack.

"I don't complain. You're so much better than Hinata and even Hanabi." Then his grandfather smiled. "You really should be the clan head."

Neji grinned. "And why do you block every attempt? You know Hanabi is still too young." His grandfather wanted to kick his leg, but he jumped up and used this to push his grandfather with his palm on the shoulder. He hit him to his own surprise and blocked the Chakra flow.

"Very good, boy." His grandfather complimented him, grabbing his shoulder. "You should marry Hanabi. That's the best way to secure our future."

Neji crossed his arms, still breathing hard because of the fight that had lasted for three hours.

_Grandfather doesn't look like this fight had bothered him at all._

"We won't marry. We are already one clan and this nonsense with the branch and main family has to end. For our future, the future of Konoha, it is important to get rid of all those antics. And if I have to fight or kill all of you to make this happen, I will do it."

His grandfather squinted his eyes.

"Nothing will ever change. This, our clan, exists longer than Konoha. We don't need those weak people to secure our future. The Hyuuga will never perish."

Neji got nearer his grandfather, looking him directly in the eye. "This arrogance led to the downfall of the Uchiha clan. All other clans inside Konoha work together and live the Will of Fire. Do you know what this clan lacks? Empathy."

He turned around. He was disgusted. Makoto followed him.

* * *

Sakura had come to her because Neji had sent her a message that he still had some business within his clan. Also she had brought back the tea.

"You should tell me where you got this tea. I never have seen those ingredients put together for the purpose to help pregnant women. I need to know this woman."

Tenten nibbled on a dry piece of bread because that was the only thing that didn't make her sick again, and nodded.

"And if you need anything else don't hesitate to call me. I won't tell anyone, but you need a friend. I'm sure you're still very shocked."

Sakura smiled at her again and Tenten wondered how she made her feel so much better by just looking at her.

"I was in the library yesterday and it scared me a lot, what I have been reading in all those books."

"Being pregnant is a hard job for a woman's body. You shouldn't overdo it and rest. And no missions."

Tenten laid down the bread, feeling her stomach contorting. If this was just the beginning, how would she feel, when the baby started kicking? She hoped so much she got used to it at some point.

"I'm more worried about Neji and his clan. They don't accept him as a leader. The only way would be if he marries Hanabi."

Sakura sighed. "Sometimes I'm really glad that I'm not from a clan with such antics. Every time I hear Ino or Shikamaru talk about their clans I am so relieved that I'm just a normal girl."

"I can relate."

Both women laughed.

"So what do you wish for? A girl or a boy?"

"A boy," answered Neji, who suddenly stood at the doorframe of the living room. He wasn't alone. Another Hyuuga was with him and Tenten felt her hair rising.

"I think I should go," Sakura said and wanted to leave, but Neji held her back.

"I hope you are staying a bit longer. Because of Makoto I finally found a solution for the clan's problems."

"What do you mean, Neji?" Tenten asked and gulped.

"I have heard that grandfather is terminally ill. He's the one suppressing me taking over as head of the clan besides Hanabi, splitting our duties. Something that never happened before and would change the clan entirely."

Tenten guessed what he was getting at and gasped. "Don't tell me you want to kill your grandfather."

Sakura looked at Neji and then went back to Tenten.

"If you suggest I'm helping you to murder someone, you don't know me at all, Neji," Sakura said with a fierce voice.

"No, we want to help grandfather," Makoto said, “he isn't ready to die because he thinks that the clan will fall apart. He needs more time."

“They hold his opinion in high regard and listen to his suggestions,” Neji added, ”if he had more time to see how things are under control, he could give his approval. He’s scared that we rush things. I want him to prove we are not compromising the integrity of the Hyuuga, but that we are improving the clan. Secure a stronger bond from the inside and help to set a path that it fruitful for the whole family.”

"And what do you want to do?" Tenten asked surprised.

"Helping him to live long enough that he sees that the clan is in good hands. And I decided the clan needs to know I'm going to be a father. No more hiding and secrets."

"But...but why, Neji?"

He walked to her and grabbed her hand.

"Because I love you, Tenten. I don't care about their opinions. I should finally order my priorities. You're more important than those old men."

She felt again like crying. She threw herself at his chest and sobbed.

* * *

That same evening Neji headed back to the Hyuuga compound. They had made an agreement to wait until Hanabi got back from her mission before they announced Tenten’s pregnancy. Sakura was with him and so was Makoto.

He had just stepped over the threshold of the main house, when he recognized the crying women and the silent murmur of the men.

"Neji," his grandmother addressed him. "It's so good you're back. We couldn't find you. Your grandfather…he's…"

Neji didn't need to hear her words. He knew what this meant. His grandfather was dead. All his plans shattered to pieces. He didn't know if this was a good sign or it would complicate things even more.

He almost had it. Happiness, a future with no uncertainties and the approval of the elders. Now his grandfather, the last strong pillar of his clan, had faded. 

Something hurt in his chest. It was the same pain he had felt when his father, his uncle and his cousin had died.

_Was it grieve?_

As his grandmother hugged him, a sole tear fell down his eye.

The last words they had exchanged were full of anger. He regretted this deeply.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wish all of you a Merry Christmas :)
> 
> This is the last chapter I publish this year for "Torn". I am not finished with the following chapter and during the holidays I will be too busy to sit down and write. We read each other again on the 4th January.


	16. You Don't Know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song: Katelyn Tarver - "You Don't Know"

Karui was so relieved they would finally head back to Kumogakure. Fifteen days away from her home was too much and she couldn’t wait to see her mother and hug her when she would come back.

At times like these, when everything seemed to fall apart she still felt like a little girl. Then she just wanted to watch her mother cooking, sneak into her bed at night and let her stroke her hair until she fell asleep.

It was ridiculous. She was a grown woman. She had fought in a war and survived. She was stronger than this. But maybe that was the reason. She was strong and independent, and therefore she needed the certainty that nothing changed. That she could always come home and her mother would stand in the kitchen, ask about her day and just listen.

She walked to the reception and gave back her key.

As she looked around she could see the leaders of the other villages and their escorts. The Tsuchikage had left yesterday. She still demanded that Tsunade should be killed and since no one of the other kage agreed she had rushed out of the last meeting and left immediately. Mifune had tried to calm them down, to find a solution.

They would meet again in two months and Karui had the feeling that it wouldn’t solve any problems.

The Alliance was the only reason Kurotsuchi hadn’t started a war yet. Orochimaru had refused to give them more information about the war preparations of Iwagakure, because he wanted to be crossed out of the bingo book and be cleared of his crimes. Nobody had agreed upon this and so he disappeared as silent as he had surprised them with his appearance.

Shikamaru came into her view, yawning and one of his arms above his head. She shook her head, confused how he was such a genius and could sleep until the last second before their departure.

She stepped up to him.

“Hey, Shikamaru. You are friends with Chouji, right?”

He blinked and looked at her confused. “Yes...why do you ask?”

“I have a message for him. Could you be so kind and give it to him?”

Karui saw his mouth form into a small smile.

“Sure, Karui. Something else?”

She tried not to blush and looked at her feet embarrassed. She had thought about this for weeks. It wasn’t a love confession or something like that. Just a simple, innocent letter between friends. Asking him if they would go eat dinner once he was in Kumo.

Nothing special or very romantic.

“That’s all. Thanks, Shikamaru. I owe you one.”

He chuckled. “Not for this. When you guys are heading out?”

She wanted to answer, but the door of the accommodation burst open. Karui saw the Leaf symbol on his head band. She had seen him before. The last time he was with Naruto and Kakashi.

“Lady Tsunade!” he exclaimed out of breath. “I need to speak with you.”

“Yamato, what are you doing here?”

* * *

“And this is your new home!” Naruto announced as he opened the door for Karin.

He had worked for three days straight to get the apartment ready for Karin and Kouki. With a little help from his friends, he had made it in time. The apartment still smelled of paint.  
Karin held her boy close and looked around with suspicion. Naruto hoped she liked her new home. She deserved something good after all the things that had happened to her. He had talked a lot with Karin, about her life with Orochimaru and the even darker times of her life before she had met him.

It was a surprise for him to find out she also was from the Uzumaki clan. That made him even more eager to help her. Most people would call him naive for helping her. She was the enemy and was watched by Anbu, every step of her followed. Even if he wanted it otherwise.

Suigetsu and Jugo still were held captive in a hidden place, but Naruto had vouched for them to be set free. Maybe Granny Tsunade would listen to him. He knew difficult times lay ahead of them. He had visited Kakashi in the morning. His sensei was quieter than usual, flinching each time an unfamiliar sound reached his ears. Gai and Kurenai visited him every day, all of his friends who could spare some time, showing that he wasn’t alone and that he was safe inside the walls of Konoha.

Naruto wanted to pay it back to those bastards. They needed Kakashi. He was an important shinobi for the village and should be the next Hokage. He deserved only good things in his life. Seeing him this broken, made Naruto furious.

“It is beautiful, Naruto. Thank you a lot,” Karin whispered, touching the couch he had bought for her.

“You need to see the bedroom!” he announced, pushing all bad thoughts aside.

He grabbed her gently by the wrist and pulled her with him.

As he opened the door to the bedroom, he heard her gasp. This was the first room he had painted and furnished. Ino and Sakura were a great help to find the right colours, pillows and bed sheets for Karin. The details were important. Above the cot was the Uchicha and Uzumaki clan symbol. Karin stood at the door frame, her eyes full of tears.

“You people are all so nice.” She gulped and walked to the bed, sitting down, looking at her son. “I don’t think I deserve being treated this way. I am your enemy.”

Naruto shook his head. “You are family. Not because you were Sasuke’s teammate or you are the mother of his child. Even not because we are from the same clan. You needed help and came to us. So of course we will help you.”

“I will do my best. I said I want to change my path of life and I will not disappoint you.”

* * *

  
Ino was heading back to the flower shop with red rimmed eyes. She had seen her therapist almost each day since her first appointment and today it had been very rough. They had talked about her survivor's guilt, her suicidal thoughts and overall self-destructive behaviour. She was on medication now to stabilize her fragile state and when she took out the pills again, looking at the label, she felt like a complete failure.

Her strength was reading the minds of others. She could see and manipulate the thoughts of others and now her own brain, her own body betrayed her. It should help her to get rid of the anxiety. She should try out if it helped her to sleep better. If not she would also get some sleeping pills.

Ino put back the meds back into her bag and continued her way.

As she looked straight ahead she saw the white, fluffy fur of Akamaru and Kiba right behind him.

All the days she had hoped he would come back soon. Seeing him now was so unexpected for her.

She started running in his direction. He raised his eyebrows surprised, but as she threw herself at his chest and he hugged her she just felt happiness.

“You are back,” she said muffled, pressing her cheek against him, inhaling his scent. “I am so glad.”

He stroked her hair, breathing out loudly.

“Didn’t I say I would be back in two weeks?” he answered with a soft voice.

“You know that our lives are always on the line.”

Reluctantly she parted from him and looked into his face. A huge smile was plastered on his face. The smile that he wore all the time.

“So I guess we are still going on a date?”

“You can bet,” she answered, standing on her toes, touching his cheek with her lips. “I am busy today. I’ll meet with Shikamaru and Chouji later. But how about tomorrow evening?”

“Sounds like a plan to me. I pick you up at around nine.”

As he leaned down to kiss her, Ino didn’t care that they were in the middle of the street where everybody could see them.

* * *

Embarrassment was nothing Kankuro was used to feel. Maybe when he watched his sister kiss Shikamaru in front of everyone, yeah, maybe that was embarrassment. Or the one time he caught both of them naked in the middle of the living room...he shook his head.

He should stop thinking about his sister and her weird boyfriend. This was about him. Not about them, who had no shame in showing everyone how lovey-dovey they were.

He sighed and looked back at the piece of paper on his desk. Around him, on the floor, in the bin lay several crumpled sheets of paper. These were his first attempts to write down what everyone else would call a love letter, and he failed poorly.

Why was this so difficult? He wasn't as good with words like his siblings, but it wasn't the first time he wrote down something. However, it felt like he didn't know what it was like using a pen. He had stored so many words in his mind and even more in his heart. He just needed to find the right tone to express his feelings.

_Dear Sakura,_

_I don't know how I should tell you this._

_I think I want to take you on a date._

He let out a frustrated groan, took the paper, formed a ball and threw it behind him. He waited for a noise that it had landed in the bin, but instead he heard someone open the wadded paper. Kankuro turned around in his chair and saw his sister standing at the door, reading the words he had just written.

“Sakura? Really, Kankuro?”

“If you are starting to mock me I swear to my puppets I will bury you in the desert, Temari.”

Temari shrugged her shoulders and bowed down, to take another sheet of paper that he had tossed aside. With a short flick of his finger he pulled it out of her reach like the rest. Sometimes it was useful he could form chakra threads.

“Don't tell me that all of this are your attempts to ask a girl for a date.”

She made a gesture at the small pile that was gathered around him and cocked her head.

“And if? Because you have a boyfriend it doesn't make you an expert for relationships.”

She raised both her eyebrows and grinned. He wanted to throw her out of his room. Or maybe lock her inside one of his puppets. He had done this before. Even if he had to mend Karasu after that. Hearing her begging to let her go had been a pleasure.

“Why don't you ask me to help you? I know both of my brothers seem to forget this on a regular basis, but I am a woman.”

“I don't need my sister to ask someone on a date.”

Of course Temari rolled her eyes. He knew she would make him feel like an idiot, unable to take a piss without help. He could do this alone. He could figure it out.

“You can stay in this room for another two hours or you let me help you. I won't tell anyone.”

“Not even Shikamaru?”

“This is a deal between siblings. But I want something out of this.”

“I knew it!” he shouted and jumped out of his chair.

She snorted. “Just a chestnut pie, when we are in Konoha. Nothing else.”

He eyed her suspiciously. That was too easy.

“Why are you helping me, Tem?”

“I think you deserve some happiness and Sakura is a good girl. So you should give it a shot.” She opened the door. “I will think of something. But, Kankuro...”

“Yeah?”

“If you mess this up and break her heart...I hope you remember what I told you.”

He nodded and gulped. His sister was terrifying.

* * *

The YakinikuQ was nothing special for most people. It wasn’t the only barbeque place in Konoha and maybe not the best, but Chouji would forever prefer the restaurant he met with his teammates. Good memories were gathered in those four walls. He remembered every occasion with Team 10 not because of the food, but the company.

He watched with delight that Shikamaru and Ino shared his appetite today. They were making jokes and sharing information about the current ongoings. A kind of sadness lingered through the room since this time it could be the last time they were eating together, war still a possibility. But seeing his teammates smile made him feel so much better. He had missed those times when he was in Kumogakure.

“Will you stay longer in Konoha, Chouji?” Ino asked and put more meat on the small fire in the middle of the table.

“I don’t know yet. Lady Tsunade wants to see me tomorrow. I hope I can stay a bit. I really missed you.”

He snatched several pieces of meat with his chopsticks and shoved them into his mouth, enjoying the taste of half-grilled meat tingling on his tongue.

“I think it is better you stay,” Shikamaru said and grabbed himself some meat. He knew that the only chance to get some was when Chouji had grabbed his share. “We need to make the next steps towards Iwagakure and the more shinobi are inside Konoha the better. All other villages had been attacked. It could be we are the next target.”

“This is so depressing,” Ino stated and grabbed a small amount of vegetables for herself. “The rebuilding of Konoha isn’t done yet, we don’t have a plan for all the injured shinobi and now Iwa is threatening and pushing for a new war.”

She sighed and Chouji saw her smile disappear.

“But we have allies,” Shikamaru said. “We are four against one.”

“You forget the smaller villages,” Ino answered. “Kiba told me things in Ame are worse than expected. He couldn’t tell me the details, but he was on a mission to gather some intel.”

“Oh, Kiba told you?” Chouji made this remark on purpose. The last time he had talked with Ino about Kiba was too present in his mind.

Ino was blushing hard and it also got Shikamaru’s attention.

“Did I miss something?”

“Ino has kissed Kiba,” Chouji said and grabbed more meat.

“CHOUJI!”

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow and frowned.

“Wait...you say Ino kissed Kiba? Not the other way around?”

Ino’s face got even redder than before. Shikamaru was grinning like him.

“Yes, I kissed him. Can we please drop the topic?”

“No way,” Shikamaru said and leaned nearer to her. “After you pestered me with Temari, I want all the details.”

“Since when are you interested in my love life, Shikamaru? Don’t you say it is too troublesome talking about that stuff?”

“Maybe I changed my mind,” he answered. “So you kissed Kiba. That’s great, Ino. It really is. Kiba is a nice guy.”

“We are going on a date tomorrow. And that’s everything I tell you two.”

“Don’t be so stiff. You don’t want to tell us what you are wearing?” The teasing tone in Shikamaru’s voice made Chouji laugh and even Ino giggled.

“Please, stop it. This is so weird, Shikamaru.”

The continued teasing Ino during the rest of the meal but Chouji could tell she enjoyed every second.

* * *

  
Tenten sat in front of Neji’s grandmother, who was sharing breakfast with her and Hanabi. Since his grandfather died, she had moved - temporarily - to the Hyuuga compound, helping Neji with all the things regarding the clan, the funeral and all the formalities. He didn’t show weakness in front of his clan, fighting through the day with his stoic character. At night she had held him, when the tears came and they were alone.

They had told Hanabi about her pregnancy and the girl had hugged her long and tightly, tears streaming down her face. Tenten had hoped Neji’s cousin would be happy about the news. She started to get used to the fact that next year she had a small bundle on her arms, that would demand her full attention. She still panicked in some moments, but Neji reassured her, he would always stand at her side, that they could make this work. When he talked to her belly full of love she believed him.

The clan watched every move of her, because they hated the fact Neji had chosen her. She was a danger for the future of the Hyuuga, a nuisance, not planned and therefore most of them showed her a cold shoulder. Makoto Hyuuga wasn’t one of them. He accompanied her even outside of the Hyuuga compound, carrying her bags if she bought groceries, following her like a shadow. Neji had tried to talk him out of this, but Makoto wanted to make sure nothing happened to her or the baby.

She was sipping on her tea and listened to Hanabi and her grandmother. Neji never had talked in a bad way about his grandmother but with deepest respect. She was a person that gave warmth and love unconditionally. She had welcomed Tenten into the family against all odds. If Neji decided to love her, his grandmother supported him. And nobody dared to insult Tenten in front of her.

“Are the other clan members still not accepting you, Tenten-san?”

“They don’t say it out loud, but the looks speak volumes, obasama.”

The elderly woman shook her head. “I understand they don’t want a leader, who is from the branch family. They are not used to it. But they don’t have another plan. It would suit them to get off their high horses and accept Neji and Hanabi as leaders, dividing the duties. Both of them are capable. But Hanabi is lacking the experience.”

Tenten nodded as did Hanabi. It wasn’t the first time they discussed this. She wanted to grab another slice of the apple in front of her, when a sharp pain stabbed her. It was coming from the inside and made her gasp. Her hand grabbed the spot it was hurting.

“What is it, Tenten-neechan?” Hanabi asked, alarmed.

“Call Sakura. I think I need her,” she hissed.

* * *

She had given Kankuro a letter which he could use as a lead for his attempt to ask Sakura on a date. She had to smile thinking about her brother growing up and admitting he had serious, deep feelings for a girl. Whatever the outcome of this was, she hoped both of them would be happy.

Temari knew how good it felt to be loved, truly loved by someone, and she hated to live three days apart from him.

It wasn’t the first time she thought about a future with him. Plans about them moving in together - she didn’t care if it was Suna or Konoha - as long as she could stay by his side. She was ready to marry him, get kids and do all the things just with him. Building permanent peace, growing old, sitting with him on the porch of their house, watching the sunset, holding hands and feeling good without worries or fears.

She had thought until recently she rescued him from the darkness in his heart and soul, but it was the other way around. Being with him made her complete. He was the counterpart of her weaknesses and made her stronger. She wanted to fight against all the bad things in the world with him.

As she stood here on the roof of the Kazekage building, watching a few clouds drifting over the sky, she knew whatever happened, she would marry him. Never in her life she was this sure about her decisions. She had struggled so much and feared to make wrong turns. She regretted things of her past. But she didn’t regret kissing Shikamaru for the first time.

She had shed too many tears in her life, in silence, privately and when she started to cry in front of him she couldn’t back down. He had crept into her heart. She relished this warm feeling in her chest, touching the spot where her heart beat for him.

 _I miss you_ , she thought as one cloud floated over her head.

She didn’t know if she was ready to ask him to make more out of their relationship, making it more official and adding weight to this bond that tied them together, but coming to closure with this realisation made her content, happy and abuzz.

It was maybe the best feeling in the universe.

* * *

Kakashi’s rehabilitation had started with a lot of sweat and tears by her sensei. The wounds of the body had healed completely, only scars and bruises left besides the ribs that needed more time to heal properly. She had used some new techniques on him, to keep his broken bones stable, because Kakashi was so stubborn and couldn’t stand still.

She had forbidden him to start training until she cleared him for this and this time he listened to her advice.

Watching him walking through the room on crutches, slowly and with cautious steps made her heart contract hard. Sakura had seen Kakashi in various states since her genin days. Chakra exhaustion, being trapped in genjutsu that attacked his mind, broken bones. She couldn’t count how often she had treated him, sometimes in the middle of the night, when he stood in front of her apartment.

The moment she became a medic nin she had become the personal doctor of her teammates and she wouldn’t have it otherwise. Treating the people she trusted the most, trusting her the same way, was something she treasured profoundly. She would never let them down.

Kakashi groaned as he made a wrong step and twisted his ankle a bit. She rushed at his side, holding him up, until the pain subsided. He clenched his hand deep into her doctor’s coat, breathing in huffs.

“I need to sit down, Sakura.”

He helped him on the next chair, grabbing a water bottle and giving it to him. Kakashi didn’t wear his mask this time and he hadn’t at every time around her. Sakura knew this was a bad sign. Even if he trusted her enough, he got careless. Giving up on the things that were so linked to his personality, his quirks made her concerned.

Another warning sign was his lack of reading his favourite novels. He had started to make excuses for his friends visiting him. He didn’t even allow Gai to come into his room, pretending to be asleep.

“Kakashi-sensei,” she said with a low voice. “I know I shouldn’t say anything and I may overstep some boundaries, but I am worried.”

She tried to sound gentle. Didn’t want to push Kakashi. He had seen things she didn’t want to imagine. She just couldn’t watch her teacher, the man who showed her the basics of being a shinobi, the importance of teamwork and when to set rules aside to rescue a friend.

As he didn’t say anything she continued.

“I am speaking as your doctor now. As an equal in ranks. You have to talk with someone. Open up about the things that happened to you.”

He jerked his head into her direction and angry expression on his face. Sakura was sure she had never seen him angry. Kakashi didn’t get angry.

“You know nothing,” he whispered, threateningly. “You’re still a child and barely dipped your toes into being a kunoichi. What do you know? Just because you’re a Jounin doesn’t mean you’re allowed to speak like this with me.”

She closed her eyes, couldn’t stand his angry glare. Sakura felt she was about to cry.

“I don’t deserve to be treated this way, Kakashi-sensei. I didn’t do you any harm.”

She exhaled and looked at him, carefully, every move of her watched by him. Sakura knew he didn’t want to be touched. She herself had post traumatic stress. Kakashi’s shoulders were tense, the muscles of his neck so visible, twitching.

“I am sorry, Sakura but I can’t play nice anymore.” He grabbed his crutches and stood up. “I won’t continue today. I am tired.”

She should have followed him, say something, but Sakura knew it was no use. Kakashi decided to stay in his head space, his own mind, giving up the fight.

She started crying as the door closed behind him.

* * *

He had called it a day earlier than usual. He was exhausted. So exhausted considering the happenings around the last Gokage meeting, the first meeting of the Shinobi Alliance.

Again Orochimaru slipped out of their hands and had hid himself in one of his caves. Gaara’s head was full and heavy, not giving out any coherent thought. In this condition he wasn’t able to overview his work.

With Iwagakure so near and Amegakure teaming up with Orochimaru he had a threat from the north of Kaze no Kuni and needed to double the security measures. He didn’t know what to do. He had to rely on the help of the other villages. Konoha would send some help as much shinobi as they could spare and he knew that wasn’t much.

They had to wait for Kurotsuchi’s next move. There hadn’t been a declaration of war yet. The peace - or truce - was crumbling, spiraling down. Talking didn't help. Kurotsuchi was so full of hate for Tsunade. She wanted her dead. She wanted the head of the Hokage and nobody agreed. Because this was the root of all evil, the beginning of another unstable period of time.

He was sitting in the kitchen, watching his siblings joking and exchanging their usual nonsense. At least in their home normalcy was visible. He could come home every day and find them, his brother and sister making this burden of leading a village more bearable.

It was worth fighting for a better future.

Temari seemed to sense his unrest and came to the table, a cup of tea in her hand.

“Kankuro is almost ready with dinner. How was your day?”

He took the cup, while she sat down. She smiled at him with narrow eyes.

“The Council wants to strike against Iwa.”

His sister nodded. “They are so predictable. Thinking a conflict is solved with another conflict.”

Most people believed Temari was a warrior by heart, but she had confessed to him that she was tired of fighting. She had taken the role of an ambassador because of her inner desire to form the shinobi world into a different way, changing the old beliefs and sayings, replacing them with new ones.

It was thanks to his sister they had such strong bonds with other villages.

“I don’t want another war,” he said more to himself than to her, but she heard him.

“I will do everything to prevent this war, but if I am not able I will fight side by side with you.”

* * *

He began to hate hospitals.

Coming home to find Tenten gone and only his grandmother with a sad face sitting on the porch didn’t ease his mind. She explained what happened to his girlfriend and was so sorry she couldn’t do anything. Neji knew he should keep his calm and not jump to conclusions, but in most cases destiny had good intentions for him.

When he reached the building he had to stop abruptly. Tenten and Hanabi came out of the building, both looking relaxed. Neji marvelled at the sun reflecting in Tenten’s hair.

He wasn’t the type to think much about beauty standards and good looks. He was attracted to Tenten. He didn’t doubt that. He just liked her character more, over her looks. She made him a better man. But seeing her this beautiful, glowing from the inside startled him.

“Neji-niisan,” Hanabi greeted him. “You didn’t have to come. I had everything under control.”

Neji walked towards the two women. He hadn’t had the words to tell how much Tenten meant to him. She was dear to him, so precious and he hated that he couldn’t do her justice. The things she did, the lengths she walked. She held his heart and soul; and even more so with their child growing inside of her.

Tenten just opened her arms for him and let him rest his head on her shoulder. Instead of him holding her, she did this for him.

“I am okay,” she whispered.

“I know,” he responded, still holding onto her. “Just wanted to hug you.”

“Maybe we should go back home,” Hanabi suggested. “Grandmother was worried and upset.”

They didn’t listen to her instead Neji rested his forehead on Tenten’s and smiled at her.

“I love you,” he mouthed.

* * *

He had expected to be greeted by a whole group of people when he came home. His mother was surrounded by Ino’s mother, Chouza and his teammates. Shikamaru had the sudden urge to turn around and leave the place for a smoke. He certainly wasn’t ready for an unofficial clan-meeting. Yoshino hasn't informed him about this. So this must be a serious issue.

He greeted all of them and sat down on the last free spot at the table. There was tea and some snacks, also various half-opened scrolls, books and other things he hadn’t seen before. Shikamaru was sure it was about the inauguration ceremony for Ino, Chouji and him. By the end of the year the deadline was set. Then all of them would be declared clan heads.

“It’s good to see you, Shikamaru. I hope you’re well.”

“Thanks, Chouza.” He gestured over the table. “What’s this?”

“Ensui approached me today,” Yoshino said and poured tea into a cup. “And asked me about Temari.”

Shikamaru had expected everything, but not this. The higher ups in the Nara clan loved to nose around in his private life. There had been different clan meetings which circled around the question if Shikamaru was suited at all to be clan head since he hadn’t reached the age of twenty yet. Therefore he hadn’t told them about his relationship with Temari. She had the Council of Suna, who already gave her a hard time. He didn’t need additional complications.

“So he decided to give you a hard time because Temari is from Suna and it’s not suitable for me to be with someone who is not a citizen of Konoha. It would endanger the legacy of the Nara clan,” Shikamaru suggested and drank a sip of his tea. “I guess he wanted to declare someone instead of me as head of the clan.”

“I know I shouldn’t be impressed, but I am,” Ino’s mother said and nodded into Shikamaru’s direction.

“He is Shikaku’s boy after all,” Chouza grinned. “But don’t worry Shikamaru. We have prepared something.”

He pointed at a scroll that had the three clan symbols wrapped around. Shikamaru took it into his hands, opening the string with a swift motion and unrolled it. As he read the contents he started to laugh.

_Hereby we_

**Yamanaka Inoichi Nara Shikaku Akimichi Chouza**

  
_declare our children_

**_Yamanaka Ino_ **

  
**_Nara Shikamaru_ **

  
**_Akimichi Chouji_ **

_clan head of our respective clans from this day on, till they give the reins and their legacy to their children._

_Thus comes into effect immediately and is agreed upon with the Sarutobi clan of Konohagakure._

Effectively he was already head of the clan. Even before the war had started. He handed the scroll to Ino and Chouji, who looked at him confused. Soon his friends joined into his fit of laughter.

“We didn’t want to make this public to give you some time to adjust,” Yoshino explained. “But since Ensui is a pain in the neck, we need to act now.”

“We need to set a date for the official ceremony.”

* * *

Kiba had thought about his date with Ino for the whole time he was on his mission. Thinking about possible ways to give her a wonderful first date.

He wasn’t a dating expert. He had never had a proper date. Just shared drinks with a woman until she took him home.

Ino should have an evening to remember. Nothing too fancy or flamboyant but with a special touch.

And he came up with an idea.

After he had left his house - his sister laughing because he had left Akamaru in her care to go on a date - a basket in his hand and more things in a backpack. He hoped Ino had taken his advice to wear comfy clothes. He didn’t want to spoil the surprise and had only said he had prepared an adventure.

She had cocked her head in disbelief, but promised to do as she was told.

As she opened the door to her house, he saw she had put some effort into her outfit and put on some makeup but her sandals, the short skirt and the blouse were nothing special. Kiba still was amazed how she could look so stunning in such simple clothes.

“Evening, Ino,” he said and grinned. “You look beautiful.”

“Thanks, Kiba,” she answered and blushed.

“Are you ready?” he asked.

She grabbed his hand. “Always.”

They talked a lot while Kiba led her through the streets to the spot he had in mind for the picnic. He wanted to watch the sunset with Ino and eat a nice meal he had prepared beforehand, some candles lit, while the moon and the stars looked down on them.

Kiba had put enough effort into this and would do it again for Ino. In these hard times he wanted to enjoy the simple things. And going on a date with this gorgeous woman was what he needed. If she smiled at him in the end was it worth it.

He stopped when they reached the meadow.

“This is it. We reached our destination, mylady,” he said, turned around and winked at her.

“Do I get to know why you carry around a basket?” she asked, a smile instantly on her face.

“I know this may sound very plain but I prepared a picnic.” He put down his basket and the backpack. “But I wanted to spend time with you. And just you.”

Ino's cheeks got red with his words. 

“This is the sweetest idea you ever had, Kiba,” she said in awe. “But why this late?”

“I am romantic by heart,” he retorted. “Wooing women with sunsets and later watching the stars is my speciality.”

She chuckled and took his hand. “Kiss me, Kiba.”

_Success._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am back! And I am ready to update this story on a regular basis.
> 
> I am very sorry for the delay, but I hope I can update with a new chapter every two weeks from now on. Since I have planned the story ahead and just need the time to write the last chapters. :)
> 
> I really missed writing this story and finally no side-projects are distracting me.
> 
> Thanks to tra_cy for suggesting this song! And also a big thank you to all the people who commented during the break. You may have motivated me to finally finish the draft of this chapter. Hope you like the development. ^^
> 
> I am a sucker for Ino-Shika-Cho moments and I couldn't help myself to write how they eat at YakinikuQ joking. And what do you think about the date with Kiba?


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